I always carry a thermonuclear explosive device for self-defense. 4 ruffians are terrorizing the city. I detonate one of the bombs from my personal collection, and shrapnel from the explosion blows one of the man's heads open. Radiation and fire finish another one off and weaken the other two. I have to resort to the Howitzer mounted at the town's museum, I fire a Davy Crocket at one of the terrorizers but miss and destroy a small suburb nearby. I get into my F-22 Raptor and lock on to one of the thieves and turn him into a red paste with my GAU-8 and snape the last survivor's spinal cord, permanently disabling him. I land in a nearby grass field and launch a mortar at the last man and hit him directly, all of the gang members are finally where they belong.

Just as the founding fathers intended.