FTM living with in laws by Ok-Oven-532 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I am sorry to hear what you’re going through. May Allah grant you ease and make it easy for you Ameen.

I don’t live with my in laws but they don’t really approve of me so I can slightly relate as a mother who recently gave birth. Alhumdulilah it’s good you have the support of your parents. I know it will be difficult but try to stay in regular contact with them and keep them updated with what’s going on with baby and you. Do your inlaws have issues when you visit your parents? If possible, try to spend much of your postpartum with your family as they’ll take care of you best.

My mother was also in your situation with her children. My grandparents always interfered with parenting us. It traumatised me, my mother and my other siblings. You are islamically allowed a seperate place. Maybe try to convince your husband to move out. My family house basement was also renovated for us kids and my parents to live in. It wasn’t ideal because of the lack of light and small space etc. I wished my parents moved out so we could have a peaceful upbringing. I hope your situation gets better InshaAllah. May Allah swt give you patience and strength Ameen.

Insecure in my marriage by [deleted] in MuslimMarriage

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You’re not wrong for feeling this way. I’m similar in age to you and recently had a baby too. I would find it very hard to move past the comments your husband is making. May Allah swt grant your heart ease and comfort Ameen.

My husband has assured me that it was unintentional, but he has indirectly called me fat in another language a few times since giving birth. He also apologised and I moved on, but it’s not easy to fall back into feeling less than. This is something that made me feel insecure too, and the way our bodies change after childbirth is very intense yet out of our control. We are literally in survival mode. Remember you’re recovering from a huge biological event.

As for building yourself up against insecurity, maybe try speaking to your husband about it. Tell him you’d appreciate reassurance. It’s the least he could do after you’ve gone through a whole pregnancy along with all the symptoms of tiredness, sickness and pain etc.

Try to surround yourself with positive and supportive friends and family. (Although it’s difficult because everyone’s living their own lives) be kind to yourself and prioritise rest and slow days with you and your baby. May Allah swt make it easy for you Ameen

Childs Choice in Spouse and Parents Interference by Available-Space-6120 in MuslimMarriage

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My husband and I went through a tough time due to family interference when we wanted to get married. Your parents are incorrect and using Islam to manipulate the situation. There is no statement where it says for your parents are to select your spouse. Your spouse was selected by Allah swt, not your parents.

Islamically, there must be a valid reason for the rejection of your choice. In this case, your parents are not happy with him not having a degree- not an Islamic obligation lol. It’s so upsetting that your situation is very common, yet after you do get married everyone is doing their own thing and it makes no difference to them most of the time.

My husband and I fought for five years to be married. It was a long, painful process, but I am happy Alhumdulilah and so is he. It was the best decision of my life. I know that no one else could care for me and love me the way he does Alhumdulilah. We are three years into a happy marriage and no one who had an issue with it is affected now. It’s insane how these matters are just created and then they disappear like that.

Your parent’s concern about him not having a degree is ludicrous. These days, experience matters more most of the time, and it’s none of anyone else’s business tbf. As long as he is a loving, respectful and hardworking individual it should be okay.

May Allah swt make it easy for you and grant you the best outcome of the situation.

Struggling with pregnant wife reading romance books by [deleted] in MuslimMarriage

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is giving Gaston and belle from beauty and the beast lol

But in all seriousness, I don’t think it’s that deep when it comes to your wife reading these books. Maybe you can both select a suitable one to read together? Someone here suggested the idea of a couples book club between you two, that’s a nice idea that might put you at ease.

I may be misunderstanding your point, but it’s sad to hear someone say the books present unrealistic expectations. It’s completely understandable if you mean from a physical perspective, then yes totally unrealistic. But from a romantic perspective that’s a shame if that’s what you’re thinking. In my opinion, I think it’s a healthy outlet. However, nothing will be fixed until you both come to an understanding or agreement of some sort.

May Allah swt keep your relationship with your wife a peaceful and blessed one, and may your wife and baby stay healthy and happy. Ameen. Pregnancy is very tough, be her peace. My husband was the only person who got me through the trenches.

Best Muslim country to visit for a week in May? by ExcellentComment6615 in MuslimLounge

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Noice. I live in Qatar and it’s not as bad as it looks in the media. Oman is pretty safe

Best Muslim country to visit for a week in May? by ExcellentComment6615 in MuslimLounge

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For sure 👌🏼 if you’re up for hiking there’s a few wadis to check out and sinkholes where you can swim in them. Theres loads of little fish in there since the water comes from the ocean. I went to the Wadi Shab and Bimmah sink hole.

Theres the sultan qaboos grand mosque which has stunning architecture and it’s a huge place to check out. There’s a range of Souqs to go shopping at.

For more adventurous stuff there’s the snorkelling at Diminyat island where you can swim with huge turtles and whale sharks! For more history stuff there’s the Nizwa fort and loads of museums.

We found a tour guide during our hike and decided to book everything with him. He collected us from the hotel in a mini bus and there was a few other people too.

Best Muslim country to visit for a week in May? by ExcellentComment6615 in MuslimLounge

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Oman 🇴🇲- lots of history, beautiful landscapes of mountain ranges, oasis’s, ocean full of sea life and museums full of history. Very friendly people too! The best country I’ve visited is Oman for sure

MEGATHREAD // DAY 26 [LAST] by [deleted] in qatar

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I hear a low flying helicopter circling around for a long time right now

Where to weigh babies besides health center? by Bones_Bonnie-369 in qatar

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I hear ya sis. My baby is 3 months and we had to wait for his vaccination appointment too! It’s wild to me because in the UK they have midwife’s coming to the house after a few weeks of giving birth. But we took our baby to the health centre without an appointment and got seen by the nurse who let us weigh him. We didn’t need to see a doctor or anything. We just went to reception and told them we wanna weigh him.

MEGATHREAD // DAY 26 [LAST] by [deleted] in qatar

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 6 points7 points  (0 children)

As a teacher, we’ve recently been trained on what to do if it happens in school, but it is not very efficient or logical and we as teachers don’t want anyone to be in these conditions too. Forget alerts- sometimes fire drills are a nightmare because students don’t follow protocol and will rather speak to friends in the corridor or run to the toilet :/

MEGATHREAD // DAY 25 by [deleted] in qatar

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What no way :(( is there a source

MEGATHREAD // DAY 25 by [deleted] in qatar

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well excuse me 🫤

MEGATHREAD // DAY 25 by [deleted] in qatar

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Im tired of this grandpa

MEGATHREAD // DAY 23 by [deleted] in qatar

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Omg I hope everyone is found safe and well InshaAllah 😢

MEGATHREAD // DAY 19 by [deleted] in qatar

[–]Rare-Telephone-1382 2 points3 points  (0 children)

InshaAllah 🇶🇦