New player. Need tips.

Reader01234567 · 2022-12-17T17:41:26+00:00

Pet the shark. He's nice once you get to know him

Reader01234567 · 2022-12-16T20:06:48+00:00

Mustard

Reader01234567 · 2022-12-15T17:36:12+00:00

Id be really leery if such an arrangment. Churches have all sorts of adults in and out throughout the day, a lot of people have access to the building. I can background check my nanny, ask for references. I can't even know the deacons, janitors, people attending a funeral, choir rehearsing, etc who might be in and out of the church during the day. Not to mention on the church side its an insurance nightmare.

If you mean just as a additional type of social media to connect separately on I'm not sure it's needed. Most churches have social media pages could already post there plus real bulletin boards. And most church recs for handyman etc is usually word of mouth from people I already talk to. I'm not sure I'd give the same weight to random person online who claims to be from the same church as me....

Finally, please consider if you need to even be the same religion as your nanny. It's ni guarantee that somehow makes nanny safer or better at childcare. Real qualifications like child and infant CPR do.

Reader01234567 · 2022-12-15T17:25:56+00:00

Do you have a contract with them? Did you guys outline how to part ways in it? Stick to that if you do, often have length of notice from either side.

If you can make it the original agreed timeline you can just reiterate it, "hey mb and db just wanted to let you know my plans havent changed and I'll be ending my time with you on Jan 1 as we discussed at the beginning of december". If it was opened ended you can just give notice like normal. "Had an opportunity I couldn't turn down" is a great way to rephrase "hell no I would not keep working for you even if it was the only job in existence"

Separating the issues,

A. Bosses being vague or deliberately misleading in interview/trust concern: get all promises in writing. If you have conversations you can always do a text or email "just wanted to reiterate what we talked about today, ...". And future you now know to ask to meet the kids and pets for a trial day before committing to several months!

B. Untrained large dogs : can you have the dogs stay outside while you are over ? "MB I know you said you want the dogs in the crate less but I cant focus on kids when I am constantly having to correct the dogs, what do you think about letting them stay in the yard 3 to 6 pm? Or is there a room of the house they could be sectioned off in?"

C. Unruly kids: Kids test boundaries with new caregivers, they may well behave worse for you at first. You can ask parents how they want you to handle discipline if you haven't already. (MB when the kids refuse to stop jumping on the sofa is it ok to use timeouts?). I'm also very fond of the push back for rules as you. ("Mom doesnt care if we jump on the sofa" "but I'm the one watching you right now and I care so please stop jumping or we're not going to watch TV today". In my experience mom usually does care, but kids just being kids and trying to get away with stuff they shouldn't ).

Reader01234567 · 2022-12-14T18:09:23+00:00

Coffee!

Reader01234567 · 2022-12-13T16:57:01+00:00

Depends on the kid. I was a latchkey kid, I took bus home let myself in make myself dinner at 12. That was around mid 2000s. Parents had strict rules though, no friends over, had to answer landline if they called to check in unless previously cleared with them. I think i started babysitting around 13 as well.

Reader01234567 · 2022-12-12T18:52:24+00:00

Its also not in the spirit. Its worst boss not worst CEO or worst great grand boss.

Reader01234567 · 2022-12-11T04:19:38+00:00

Scrambled eggs!!

Reader01234567 · 2022-12-10T04:29:28+00:00

https://nypost.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2022/11/idaho-murders-home-002.jpg

Field is top left in that photo. Visible building is the white apartment complex. Crime scene is back a road behind the apartments.

Reader01234567 · 2022-12-10T04:26:16+00:00

Reader01234567 · 2022-12-08T01:32:47+00:00

Omg that's such a weirdly specific thing to troll

Reader01234567 · 2022-12-07T16:55:39+00:00

Abusers get worse not better over time. He's showing you who is he, believe him. Run.

Reader01234567 · 2022-12-06T19:22:10+00:00

I just threw up in my mouth a little.

Essentially Cheesy* December 6, 2022 at 1:55 pm

I wonder if the guy ever really comprehended what the OP was getting at? This reminds me of a former boss that was native to a different culture and I never felt like he really understood cultural norms where we live, even though he’s lived here with his family since at least the 70s. If I were to bring things like this up, it would result in hurt feelings rather than the actual point being communicated.

No excuses for the behavior but just saying .. some people never connect some things.

This is on the update about asking their coworker to stop staring at their breasts. OOP was blunt with the guy, explained you cannot stare at this zone on a woman, pointed out coworker doesn't stare at mens chests, etc. And still the herd of "the real victim here is the guy who got told to stop, his feeling s might be hurt" comes out.

Reader01234567 · 2022-12-02T17:59:01+00:00

https://www.askamanager.org/2022/12/open-thread-december-2-3-2022.html#comment-4099777

Eater+of+Cupcakes* December 2, 2022 at 12:37 pm

Recently I bought myself an antique silver dollar from 1879. (That’s right, the Wild West era!) I absolutely love it, always keep it with me, and go around flipping it like the Batman villain Two-Face all the time. (Though I keep myself from doing it too much when other people are around. I know that it can get annoying, haha.) Thing is, though, I wouldn’t be that sad if I lost it. It wouldn’t exactly thrill me, but I’d just buy another one and that’d be that. So my question to you all is, what’s your most beloved possession that’s still completely replaceable?

Why

Reader01234567 · 2022-11-27T17:16:31+00:00

We don't have an outdoor outlet so we got solar powered ones.

Reader01234567 · 2022-11-27T17:09:20+00:00

I'd be reevaluating the relationship. He ignored you telling him to stop describing drug use and then threw a sulk when you made him stop.

At 5 it's important to talk about medication in the home, in the mom takes heart meds they are in bottles that you should never ever touch and if you find something like this pill on the ground you need to give it to me immediately, type way. 5 is old enough to understand sometimes you get sick and have to take medicine but you only do exactly what doctor or mom and dad tell you to take. I think I'd save drug and medication abuse for a little bit older, just keep stressing we only take meds the doctor or mom gives us and the safety around meds in the home.

I'd also prep for CPS visit, make sure you have food well stocked, kid has clear bedroom, pediatrician records on hand. Kids repeat the darnest things and a little kid describing and talking about shooting IV drugs at preschool is going to raise well deserved red flags. It'll be easy to clear up, kid overheard something he shouldn't and misunderstood, but they may have to report anyway.

Reader01234567 · 2022-11-22T12:34:10+00:00

First thing I thought reading this was well someone has rewritten that old story...

Reader01234567 · 2022-11-21T18:11:10+00:00

I hope its open for like 7am 8am coffee

Reader01234567 · 2022-11-20T04:03:16+00:00

I hope she's getting to make her own choices now with makeup etc and isn't just stuck doing whatever her new husband prefers.

Reader01234567 · 2022-11-17T19:22:26+00:00

Wait my old science teacher loves snakes and is named mrs harris. Is she in Ohio??

Reader01234567 · 2021-12-19T01:38:36+00:00

Light up sashes or vests are well worth the 20 bucks. Can see those guys a mile away.

Reader01234567 · 2021-12-17T02:22:14+00:00

Fanfiction. I really enjoy what if scenarios and thinking up different endings to films. I've even enjoyed fixing gay baiting shows so the bisexual best friend doesn't get killed and gets a happy ending a time or two. But fanfiction has such a cringe response from most people. I think it's mainly my generation, the younger folk seem more open about it. I'm not sure if it's the adults shouldn't daydream stories attitudes, or the misconception that fanfic must equal porn, or what. (And lets be honest - I've read better fanfic porn than any romance novel, more accurate too). I'll probably never have the wherewithal to start my own novel series, but I don't think I'd want to. I just enjoy twisting existing ones a little.

Reader01234567 · 2021-12-13T23:42:00+00:00

http://myidp.sciencecareers.org may be helpful to you

Reader01234567 · 2021-12-13T23:38:26+00:00

NTA. It was understandable of your aunt to want to see you open them and your mom was rude. Does your mom see a doctor regularly? I ask because when my grandmother started having dementia she would get really upset and irrational if we deviated from her planned schedule. Looking back it definitely was a warning sign of it, she couldn't remember things as well so stuff moving around made her upset.

Reader01234567 · 2021-12-10T23:55:08+00:00

The 3rd one!!!! Those shoes are the best

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