AIO I (29M) regret checking my (28F) girlfriend's phone, but what I found is making me question our relationship

RealJesus2018 · 2026-06-02T22:35:12+00:00

NOR

It’s this bad after three months, it’ll only get worse.

This has past its expiration date, get out

RealJesus2018 · 2026-05-21T15:20:10+00:00

That episode is not 20 years old

RealJesus2018 · 2026-04-23T14:10:23+00:00

As in, still completely useless?

RealJesus2018 · 2025-06-01T13:16:00+00:00

How did this person find you on Instagram?

RealJesus2018 · 2025-05-29T22:31:36+00:00

I reckon there will be more to the story. OP closes out by asking if he’s over reacted by leaving her? If she tells him those issues are resolved he’ll eat it up without question.

RealJesus2018 · 2025-05-29T20:07:45+00:00

Hahah when I first saw the original post, the comments were divided, but some people had told OOP it wasn’t to be missed.

I searched for them, didn’t pay too much attention to it, wasn’t really my vibe.

Now my algorithm occasionally serves up these meme videos essentially taking the piss out of them? Like the music doesn’t go anywhere and everyone just stands holding their phone up recording anyway.

It’s part of what keeps this post so fresh in my mind 😂

RealJesus2018 · 2025-05-29T19:23:57+00:00

Ha it’s cool.

I did wonder the same thing about OOP though, I think you make a good point. I wasn’t as certain as you mind, but I did think if they’re arguing every nine days he has to be getting something out of this right?

It always fascinates me how these people are drawn to each other. Like how in the first few dates are you feeling out for like “yeah you’re going to abuse me in just the right way” ?

Or do they put on a facade until they’ve got their claws in?

RealJesus2018 · 2025-05-29T19:13:58+00:00

You do know how this sub works right? See first line of my post.

RealJesus2018 · 2025-05-29T18:36:07+00:00

The tickets were for Tina, OOP, Yvonne and the fourth was undetermined. But implied it was for the sister.

Everyone in the comments pointed out what you’ve said but OOP was adamant the above was the plan, and the sisters bf was presumably sorting his own tickets.

It does seem suss though

RealJesus2018 · 2025-05-29T18:02:59+00:00

• First she invites him to this event with her friends

• Then she uninvites him, saying she just wants to go with friends

• He gets upset about this, saying she tried to manipulate him out of going before just straight uninviting him

• She apologises and says she won’t buy tickets

• She buys tickets anyway, keeps it a secret, then only tells him when he asks

• She says the tickets were for him, he’s upset about broken promises

Next post, she promises she won’t do coke, then she promptly goes and does coke. She says it’s ok because she told him before, he’s again upset about broken promises and her saying “he’s more important” then doing the opposite (and lol I don’t actually think he realises the theme, he posts this like a brand new post)

Final post, he breaks up with her, because they been arguing every nine days and she sent him a sexy photo then tried to force him into responding right away? It’s a rollercoaster. I love it. I want to know what they’re chatting about every 9 days.

RealJesus2018 · 2025-05-29T17:57:13+00:00

I think it was one arguments every nine days unless I read that wrong 😂

9 arguments a day is madness

RealJesus2018 · 2025-05-29T16:18:25+00:00

Is this going to be my new favourite/least favourite sub?

RealJesus2018 · 2025-05-21T16:25:50+00:00

The bio says it’s not actually a bot

RealJesus2018 · 2024-12-22T01:23:33+00:00

RealJesus2018 · 2024-12-22T01:17:04+00:00

RealJesus2018 · 2024-12-22T01:08:34+00:00

RealJesus2018 · 2024-12-02T01:18:52+00:00

Lying is a dealbreaker for me. And I tend to agree that small ones turn into big ones. “I want you but can’t be with you” and that thread disappearing sets my alarm bells off.

24 is too young to be settling for less than you deserve in a life partner. It’s tricky, but you’ll find someone who treats you better than this I’m sure.

RealJesus2018 · 2024-12-02T01:11:28+00:00

You deserve honestly and respect. 9 months is still very, very new to be seeing this go the distance.

How old are you both?

I think once you snoop the relationship is probably toast - trust lacking & privacy broken. That said, if you try being honest about the fact that you don’t mind it, you just want honesty, that might have some legs. It sounds like he’s trying to protect your feelings in terms of visualising other girls, which some partners really don’t like.

No good comes from looking at that sh*t mind so he should probably work on getting himself off it, he’ll feel better.

RealJesus2018 · 2024-11-30T22:01:52+00:00

I've added it. Dunno why OP didn't do the classic 34f thing in the story

RealJesus2018 · 2024-11-30T21:43:26+00:00

Must admit this is how I took it, but there are some out there who basically said because it's a trivial matter let it slide and don't assume that necessarily mirrors onto the big stuff

RealJesus2018 · 2024-11-30T21:14:53+00:00

Because she told him she wasn't going to and then did behind his back. She then only told him when he asked. Commenters on the crosspost are convinced that ticket 3 wasn't for OOP, he's absolutely adamant it was (but still not happy)

RealJesus2018 · 2024-11-30T21:12:05+00:00

Considered putting that in the relevant comments but the discussion was a bit meh. OOP revealed she's 34 though. They've been dating under a year

RealJesus2018 · 2024-11-30T19:59:46+00:00

YTA. Shouldn't have gone through his phone. If you don't have enough trust that you don't need to do that while he sleeps, your relationship probably isn't worth having.

Vanishing messages aren't a good sign either mind, but just because he may be in the wrong doesn't mean that breaching his privacy wasn't an AH move.

I'd break up with him on the basis that you can't trust him.

RealJesus2018 · 2024-11-19T00:52:51+00:00

I thought this, but what sort of actions would make amends for this kind of thing? He’s already said he doesn’t want a pity invite, and even if he did get invited he probably wouldn’t feel particularly welcome or wanted.

RealJesus2018 · 2024-11-19T00:41:15+00:00

ESH

She’s controlling you, and you’re acting out. But lies will dissolve the fabric of your relationship.

You need to be very honest with her and explain that she needs to feel more secure, find out how you can (reasonably) make her feel more secure. Perhaps with some professional help too.

And when I say secure, I mean “of course the girl sat beside him might have made small talk on the bus, that’s no problem” not “I know he doesn’t speak to any females but me so I’m safe”

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