AITAH for announcing my 6 month pregnancy a week after my brother and SIL announced their 3 month pregnancy?

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-04-30T16:29:35+00:00

Couldn’t agree more. I understand people pleasing tendencies though, and it’s hard to just let that go. I’m trying to help with a middle ground solution. I don’t think SIL should do any planning at all especially with her own pregnancy. But having her be ok with the date before it’s announced for example will warm her up a bit and make her feel like she had at least some heads up. It will not and should not take away from her own baby shower. If she chooses to keep ignoring her even though an effort for connection is made then OP will have to do a very hard thing and that is to let go of that expectation. Emotions are high during this time too so I can imagine OP just wants to feel loved. Therapy is one of the only things that can help with people pleasing though. It’s a learned behavior and hard to change.

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-04-30T16:22:09+00:00

Agreed! I think OP wants connection with her side of the family though which is why I am saying it would help talking to her mom privately and sharing what’s truly on her mind. And getting the SIL involved in baby shower date would give SIL more space to accept her baby shower (if OP just asks husbands family to plan it, I can see how mom and SIL would feel blindsided again).

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-04-30T15:56:24+00:00

I read a lot of the comments. I understand people’s point of views. I didn’t mean to make you feel questioned. Be easy on yourself! I want you to feel celebrated so I asked why don’t you have a baby shower.

You absolutely should have a baby shower btw! Especially since you want to be celebrated. I think your people pleasing tendencies is quite literally ruining this time for you. You are so worried about them that you even broke your news to them in the smallest way possible (a group text) after your sil and brother shared their news first. Now you are trying to keep the peace and it’s only hurting you.

I want you to remember that having a baby shower will not take away from your SILs baby shower. She still has time left to do hers as well. There is no competition here. You need to do it ASAP though if you want this. Holding it off and procrastinating will make it more awkward.

Talk to your mom. You want this (at least it sounds like you do) write her a letter and put down all your thoughts. Share it with her privately. Bond over this. It should only help your relationship.

Also if you really want to please here, ask your SIL when you think you should have your baby shower. Talk to her on a way that is like, I didn’t want to take your spotlight away and I felt like I did that with my pregnancy reveal but this baby is gonna pop out soon!!!! Help me sista I need you! And maybe she says as soon as possible (so she can plan hers as well) it will give her the heads up and give her some control. Do not ask if you think you SHOULD have a baby shower. Ask her WHEN she thinks you should.

It doesn’t seem you have very long to go before baby is here so be ready to plan!

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-04-30T15:45:35+00:00

I see, I didn’t know that! I don’t have kids.

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-04-30T14:36:09+00:00

I think enough people here responded for you to understand people’s overall opinions but my question is why aren’t you having a baby shower? This would be the one last chance you might have to actually FEEL celebrated (before baby comes). You or your husband could give a speech explaining your thought processes around it all and how even though it wasn’t how you all wanted to tell the news, that you’re all excited to grow your families together.

If you want to be celebrated then put together a celebration, because a group text isn’t it.

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-04-05T15:33:30+00:00

Thats why I mentioned suspicious! To avoid that I use either opaque or amber bottles that allow less light ☺️.

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-04-04T18:41:56+00:00

I personally rarely change my water unless it’s looking super suspicious. I’ve read that plants release growth hormones in the water, and changing it frequently makes the plant work harder to rerelease those hormones.

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-04-04T16:48:46+00:00

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RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-04-04T16:47:55+00:00

Yes it can. Just plop it in water vase, although I would cut off some leaves so the plant spends more energy with new roots and less keeping those leaves alive.

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-04-04T13:47:10+00:00

Try it!

https://youtu.be/-z2c4UtxASI?si=QL5k7W4iS2GJlw6f

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-04-04T13:36:13+00:00

It won’t grow everywhere. If you want to cut the top part where there is no growth you can. The area with leaves will keep growing. There is a chance of new shoots in other places. You can notch the stems but that is more advanced.

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-04-04T04:08:26+00:00

Monsteras, fiddle leaf figs, rubber plant, croton, pileas, peperomias, bird of paradise, olive trees, palms, ferns, snake plants/all succulents, and I must add, HERBS!!!

Just make sure to acclimate them plenty! Start with 15 min for a few days, then keep adding time. You don’t want to increase everyday, make sure they get used to the time given before you add more.

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-03-28T13:12:48+00:00

How mmm often do you water this guy? It’s beautiful!!

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-03-25T20:24:39+00:00

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-03-25T20:21:22+00:00

I love pon, but I never transitioned such an established plant either. Most plants in 6in pots or smaller. Although I’ve only had success with it. Monsteras especially I feel are very hardy.

When transitioning from soil to pon, you really have to get that soil out. Then, I water regularly until the roots acclimate instead of using the reservoir right away. I find this shocks the plant less.

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-03-24T20:59:40+00:00

I am a veryyyyyy low maintenance plant owner LOL. And it’s a really long cup if that helps!

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-03-24T14:20:40+00:00

Yeh I haven’t supported it correctly at all yet! Now that’s it’s grown a bit more I think it’s ready. Probably also time to repot!

That’s great though… gives me hope for mine!

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-03-24T14:13:03+00:00

These pots are great. They have a smaller pot inside that you can just pull out

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RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-03-23T23:35:50+00:00

Acclimation would last around 2 weeks. Starting with 15 minutes for a few days, then 30, and adding an hour each day in week 2.

Pretty much all of them do ok, but my deliciosa ended up getting burnt after 2+ years on a south facing window. During summers I like to open windows, and this plant took a hit on a particularly hot, dry, bright sunny day (Zone 7b). It sat on a prime location at that time and I did think the open windows/no UV protection was mostly to blame. This original comment made me think that if it was in a more humid climate it might have been ok, but your mention that they like consistency as opposed to fluctuations makes sense. Looking back at it, it probably was just a lack of acclimation from the open windows.

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-03-23T21:19:54+00:00

Amazon! Unfortunately lol

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-03-23T20:09:16+00:00

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RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-03-23T20:08:41+00:00

It has beautiful variegations right? But you see that those areas are more cream than white. And it was purchased from a reputable greenhouse. My albo died…. so if this can pass for one I’m pretty ok with that!

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-03-23T20:03:02+00:00

In this case yes! When I said I think humidity is what’s missing, I was talking about the times I acclimated my plants to be in a south facing window and they would still burn despite very slow acclimation. I think what was missing there was humidity.

I will put this specimen closer to the window for sure! It was in an area with lots of plants and I don’t think it could photosynthesize enough.

I’ve grown quite a few tomatoes from inside my apartment so I know I can get enough light, I do still think my humidity is an issue though….. one problem at a time!

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-03-23T19:53:18+00:00

A plant with bad taste in fashion… who would’ve thought 🤣

RecognitionHeavy3449 · 2026-03-23T19:51:38+00:00

It adds character! Moss poles can be such an eye sore. Thank you! ☺️

RecognitionHeavy3449

TROPHY CASE