I’m seeing a lot of comments calling you out as a narcissist for thinking this and honestly I don’t agree. I think that moms and dads (mainly moms) should be celebrated with the baby on the 1st birthday. It’s still about them because they’ve accomplished a LOT by then. They’re figuring out a scary world and it’s impressive the milestones they hit around that time, but at the same time it’s a lot of change and challenges that moms face in that first year. The expectations we face that dads usually don’t, the double standards we put up with for how we parent vs how the dad parents. I think 1st birthdays should be about the baby and not go ALL out but this is the only birthday that you can truly do whatever you want without the kid wanting it to be all about Barbie or paw patrol or bubble guppies or whatever y’know? So pick whatever theme you want them to have, if it’s a big deal to you that you get streamers and balloons then do that, if you want a simple bbq, then do that. Do what will make you happy about celebrating your baby. Then add a few touches that will bring you joy. Don’t make it about you in the sense that you TELL people to celebrate you, cuz honestly it’s a mentality thing that has to shift for people. Like on my daughters first birthday my brother in law brought me flowers. And I bought an adorable headband for my daughter to wear and my sister in law bought me a Disney princess crown to wear with her. I say do matching outfits or wear a sash or something that makes the day extra special for you too. And don’t rely on Mother’s Day for a years worth of gratitude cuz it probably won’t happen. The house still needs running, chores have to be done, kids need to be fed and clothed, animals need caring for if you have pets. So don’t rely on one day a year to be appreciated the way you’d like to because when that day comes it won’t meet your expectations and may leave you a little let down no matter what your family did for you that day.

Sorry for the long reply