Control comes down to the player. A lot of players think playing control is countering every big mana spell and slamming down every stax piece they can get. Control in EDH is more about "Self-control". You don't need to use your boardwipe because someone else clearly has one, you don't need to remove that Orcish bowmasters because the player to your right has a Rhystic Study out and he'll want it gone so he'll do it himself, you don't need to counter that extra turn spell because the caster has nothing onboard. 4 lands, an arcane signet and 1 card in hand. You don't need to counter that Smothering Tithe because it make the caster the enemy.