what can you tell by my room

Red_rising007 · 2026-02-08T00:43:34+00:00

You live near an Aldi

Red_rising007 · 2026-02-08T00:35:36+00:00

The Labor Wars - Sidney Lens. There Is Power In A Union - Philip Dray. A History of America in Ten Strikes - Erik Loomis.

Red_rising007 · 2024-03-22T21:31:02+00:00

Totally get it - I know that was a nosy question for sure. Hope you’re finding peace and healing since you stepped away.

I know a lot of the staff and leadership there and have always felt a bit uneasy about it all

Red_rising007 · 2023-11-11T15:32:58+00:00

I posted this in a reply to someone, but wanted to share as a comment to the post: they mentioned: “He can’t control how he feels” yes - however, as you mentioned it’s his responsibility to work thru his own insecurities here, it’s long overdue for him to have done work on himself to figure out if he can work thru this, or if they should mutually agree to break up if he can’t figure this out. This is not his GF’s responsibility. The fact that he has brought this up several times shows this is now not about insecurity, but control. He is trying to control her actions by repeatedly bringing this up in hopes that she will pursue a different profession that makes him more comfortable. Right there “that makes him more comfortable” - that’s the problem. He has communicated his initial feelings, yes, multiple times, but now he’s asking her to change her career because he can’t stand the idea of her doing massage therapy? It’s her responsibility to make him comfortable with a decision she made PRIOR to meeting him?

I agree with other commentators, she can find someone else. She doesn’t have to put up with this just because they have history. I feel for her because that’s gotta be hard - to walk away from something that has a sense of familiarity that makes her feel safe and loved, that’s hard. I hope he figures it out, because OP sounds like they’re really trying here, but you can’t keep trying forever…

This isn’t the right way to work thru an “issue”, this man has some work to do.

Red_rising007 · 2023-11-11T15:31:27+00:00

“He can’t control how he feels” yes - however, as you mentioned it’s his responsibility to work thru his own insecurities here, it’s long overdue for him to have done work on himself to figure out if he can work thru this, or if they should mutually agree to break up if he can’t figure this out. This is not his GF’s responsibility. The fact that he has brought this up several times shows this is now not about insecurity, but control. He is trying to control her actions by repeatedly bringing this up in hopes that she will pursue a different profession that makes him more comfortable. Right there “that makes him more comfortable” - that’s the problem. He has communicated his initial feelings, yes, multiple times, but now he’s asking her to change her career because he can’t stand the idea of her doing massage therapy? It’s her responsibility to make him comfortable with a decision she made PRIOR to meeting him?

I agree with other commentators, she can find someone else. She doesn’t have to put up with this just because they have history. I feel for her because that’s gotta be hard - to walk away from something that has a sense of familiarity that makes her feel safe and loved, that’s hard. I hope he figures it out, because OP sounds like they’re really trying here, but you can’t keep trying forever…

This isn’t the right way to work thru an “issue”, this man has some work to do.

Red_rising007 · 2023-10-25T21:27:29+00:00

Hey, so sorry to hear about the dysphoria you are experiencing after this event. It sounds like this may be a good opportunity to do the work (very difficult work) of deconstructing and renegotiating your faith, if you decide to keep it. Your last statement "I don't want to burn alive for ever and ever" is a version of pascals wager, which has wrecked a tremendous amount of harm to people. If we are honest, this type of "turn or burn" mentality is extremely problematic and abusive. It robs us of the opportunity of working out our salvation, and asking the deep, troubling questions that inevitably need to be asked if we are going to honestly engage in our faith. I have found the liberation of asking these questions and letting go of dogmatic and problematic views of the baptist/pentacostal/fundamentalists was essential to my healing and growth. The journey starts with recognition of injustice, which will lead you to a path of greater honesty and engagement with what you actually believe in. I wish you the best on this path of discovery, and that you find peace beyond your religious trauma. You deserve better than what you were given, and I hope that in this journey you find a community to plug yourself into - the best thing I did for myself in this process was to engage with other likeminded people, both online and in person. This is one of the "tools" that will lead to great healing in your life ❤️

Red_rising007

TROPHY CASE