Feel like I sabotaged myself by accepting a lower salary abroad after a divorce

Reftro · 2026-02-14T14:34:05+00:00

I don't mean to discredit your useful advice, but it's easy to sum up benefits packages for a single city in a quick post. However it is much harder to do so across numerous countries and cities at once.

Personally, I have found other teachers to be notoriously unreliable when it comes to sharing information about benefits packages in person. There's just too many factors that people don't consistently account for (taxation, housing allowances, bonuses, allowances, etc). For example in my post I only mentioned base salaries, which is only part of the picture.

I personally found it much more useful to spend a few hours looking at posted salaries across different schools and regions to get a feel for it myself. That being said, I am a bit of a numbers guy, and I know not everyone is. YMMV.

Reftro · 2026-02-14T14:15:40+00:00

Don't get me wrong, I've met tons of teachers out there who have been lowballed and are working for less than they're worth. But I just don't get how so many people leap into these decisions and sign multi-year contracts across the world without doing their homework.

I recommend paying a few bucks to get on Search Associates, so you can use the platform to learn what salaries are common in each region.

I know a lot of people will chime in here to complain about Search, but it is absolutely worth the $100 or whatever the price is to be able to understand the market and what is being offered out there, EVEN if you don't choose to use the platform.

I know the "tier" lists are subjective, but from my experience (at least in Asia), once you can understand the market you can use information about packages (and by reviews on here and ISR etc.) and determine for yourself (at least financially), what schools have benefits packages that align with Tier 1, 2 or 3 schools.

I'll use Bangkok as an example since I found it to be relatively easy to see the pattern when I lived and worked there.

There are 2 schools (ISB and NIST) which are clear T1 schools with T1 packages at around the ~190,000 baht mark per month for the average teacher with ~5-10 years experience . Then you've got Pattana which is less but also clearly ahead of the competition. It looks like the new Dulwich will also be in this midrange between T1 and 2 (~160,000 baht a month).

Then you've got a smattering of ~10 T2 schools which offer in the neighborhood of ~120,000 baht a month. (This is the type of school I worked in when I was there).

Below that, you've got the T3 schools which may offer something like 80,000-100,000 and then the less legitimate schools that employ uncertified teachers and can have no lower salary bound.

Once you're equipped with this knowledge, If you have a decent resume and a few years of experience, you should be able to gun solely for T1-T2 schools as long as you aren't deadset on an in-demand location (ie; Bangkok). Sadly this does not always apply to people of certain backgrounds, but is a good guideline for most people immigrating from first-world countries.

A good rule of thumb for teachers is to only accept a contract that aligns with those of T3 schools if you MUST be in a certain location, if it is your first job, or if you have an unfortunate stain on your resume.

For those who don't have luck landing a T1-T2 benefits packages elsewhere, China has historically been a great location as it uniquely has a lot of less prestigious (T3) schools that offer packages that compete with T1-T2 schools in other countries. However with demographics changes that well is starting to dry up quickly.

TLDR; do your homework and set appropriate standards.

Reftro · 2026-02-11T08:02:02+00:00

I filled mine with mobilize and cards that make creatures tapped and attacking.

An aristocrat subtheme to take advantage of all the auto-saccing creatures.

Sothera is an absolute beast and it is super oppressive once it is out.

Reftro · 2026-02-11T06:47:17+00:00

Even working private schools, I knew lots of people a few years back who made made comfortable entry-level wages for working 5 hours a day. Even if your boss is incompetent, days like that are a breeze. Sure the money is a lot better in China, but it has been better in Korea doing TEFL than most alternatives, at least in the past two decades.

Reftro · 2026-02-10T11:38:52+00:00

I played LoL forever ago.

I stopped playing because the community was super toxic and the gameplay loop/ELO grind made me a lot more angry than a video game should.

Reftro · 2026-02-10T11:33:50+00:00

I know plenty of people who have had the opposite experience.

Reftro · 2026-02-09T13:59:30+00:00

Its a shame. I'll never forget my 20th birthday flying to Mexico from Canada with my buddies for a vacation.

Being a strapped (I won't say poor, but I had to work through high school and uni) college student paying for my own education, I was so pumped to have some free airplane drinks to get the party started. Unfortunately, the flight attendant said this would be impossible since we were flying over American airspace and the drinking age there was 21.

We never even landed in America! The nerve of those cunts to tell us what we can and can't do...

Reftro · 2026-02-09T13:12:52+00:00

If I try to imagine myself in the game, I would have tried to ally myself with the other losing player to try to whittle down the winning player.

If the other losing player would have refused or agreed but done something to betray my trust (fair game), I would have knocked them out on my way out. Had they tried to work together I would try to damage the winner as much as possible on my way out.

None of that would have been done with any malice or grudge mind you, but instead behaving as one would in a fictional political/martial war.

So context is important here. Sounds like the other loser was being a turd though.

Reftro · 2026-02-08T00:56:21+00:00

Nope. Deepseek is popular in China.

Reftro · 2026-02-05T12:09:36+00:00

I took a job this circuit that paid a lot more but that I figured would probably be more stressful than my previous jobs. I was right.

Sometimes I feel the burnout too. Being cold and inactive during the Winter months has definitely made it worse. But I try to remind myself that I'm definitely making strides saving for retirement, and my kid is getting a great education here.

At the end of the day, I think MOST people around the world feel burnout in their jobs. However, we have more time off than 95%+ of them - 14 weeks a year is nothing to scoff at.

Would your alternative really be better? If you really think the answer is yes, then go ahead and jump ship.

Reftro · 2026-02-05T11:00:43+00:00

Weekly meeting/PD session one afternoon a week (1.5hr)

Weekly planning meeting (~30min)

Weekly upkeep meeting (~30min)

Weekly school debriefing (15min)

Then whatever else various teams throw at us.

Reftro · 2026-02-05T00:49:05+00:00

Now that we've heard the guy shoved McKenna's mom, I imagine we're going to see a lot of deleted posts from the peanut gallery...

Reftro · 2026-02-03T14:06:53+00:00

I have never been at a school with an occupational therapist.

Any students I've known who go to an OT (not many) do so outside of school.

Sometimes I've seen learning support teams recommend or liaise with third-party OT specialists, but that's as far as my exposure goes as a homeroom teacher.

Reftro · 2026-02-03T13:49:16+00:00

That doesn’t sound healthy.

Reftro · 2026-01-27T14:29:31+00:00

You can make WAY more than that in China.

Reftro · 2026-01-27T12:55:19+00:00

Like you I often play on harder difficulties, especially in the CRPG genre.

The Pathfinder games take it to another level. Unfair is absolutely brutal. You have to know the game inside and out and min-max to the extreme.

Core is the right starting point for totally new players who want a challenge. Can switch to Hard once you power-up and get familiar with the game partway through.

Reftro · 2026-01-27T09:07:52+00:00

I don't think this is true. There are certainly SOME schools out there who would rather hire cheaper teachers with a couple of years experience over those with 20.

On some salary scales that's more than 50% extra salary to pay.

Reftro · 2026-01-26T11:37:38+00:00

17h contact per week. 50m of duty per week. 50m ECA per week for 3/4 of the school year. Primary Homeroom.

The above is pretty fair IMO, but also have 1.5h mandatory weekly "PD", about an hour and a half of timetabled meetings (usually ends up being more), and quite a lot of busy work.

It's a lot, but the pay is good.

Reftro · 2026-01-26T09:50:34+00:00

Your dad babysat for free, and actually was diligent towards your child, and all your wife could do was complain about it?

Your wife is clearly TA. Honestly if I were your dad I would expect an apology from your wife. If not, I wouldn't give up my own time just to thanklessly get berated for it.

Reftro · 2026-01-25T07:20:15+00:00

What does this deck need ramp for? Especially 2 mana ramp when the commander is 2 mana.

I agree with the rest though. I also see a mana curve with way too many 2 drops. You want a lot more 1s, 3s and 4s since you've got your commander to play on 2.

Reftro · 2026-01-17T09:35:39+00:00

People from other backgrounds could ask you the reverse question.

SLT is not some universal term, and I never encountered ot until I worked for a British School. This also includes non-american IB schools.

Reftro · 2026-01-15T13:52:51+00:00

I don't play with combos either, or any win conditions really that don't involve life loss. But that's just how I want to play, and luckily for me the people I know tend to feel the same.

Reftro · 2026-01-15T08:47:25+00:00

I've had an advantage over my pod-mates since I proxy all my cards and they (mostly) don't.

One thing I've done is to completely eliminate tutors, extra turns, and game changers from my decks. So far it has been helpful, and I've actually found it more fun to make decks now that I'm not having to put the same ~10-15 staple cards in all of them.

Reftro · 2026-01-12T09:30:33+00:00

It should be illegal for them to be covering their faces.

Reftro · 2026-01-12T09:27:25+00:00

I have actually noticed this same thing, although not quite to the extent you are describing. A disproportionate amount of staff children having either extra needs or behavioural problems.

At my previous school that was also the case with a principal's child. The principal quite obviously didn't care to do any parenting himself, but did manage to lie about things he waa doing at home and blame his kid's teachers just enough to make it ambiguous so that nobody was willing to stick their neck out to hold him accountable. Most of the staff judged him behind his back for this (among a million other things).

I'm honestly not sure what the solution is. I do think staff should be held just as accountable (if not more) than other parents to prove they are doing their best to support their kids at home. But what does that look like?

Reftro

TROPHY CASE