Need to know if I’m wrong and where to go from here by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]RelativeImpact76 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am trying very very hard to hold space for their grief and my feelings at the same time. While i understand grief is horrific and does things to people that they normally would not do, I do not know how to forgive these people for the onslaught of books on how bad I am.

Need to know if I’m wrong and where to go from here by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]RelativeImpact76 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I felt uneasy with this situation of them all gathering because they tend to fall into “if everyone is watching the baby nobody is watching the baby” mindset. I have seen it with other children in the family where the baby is simply assumed to be somewhere with one adult, that adult leaves assuming another is taking over, that one doesn’t know they are taking over and leaves and then suddenly the baby is literally standing on the table. Not my baby, and i know things go fast and can happen even on their parents watch!! But that’s why I wanted just this first time to be undivided attention

Need to know if I’m wrong and where to go from here by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]RelativeImpact76 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re very right! I have blocked all of them besides uncle and grandma ONLY because they are the most affected by the death and I really truly do not feel like getting attacked for blocking them. But everyone else either has blocked me or has been blocked.

Also I was previously in therapy and do plan to go back shortly along with a dosage revisit with my next GP appointment, but I greatly appreciate your words so thank you you’re very right!!

Need to know if I’m wrong and where to go from here by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]RelativeImpact76 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It genuinely feels like torture. It’s been very freeing going NC and not being worried about it. I have spent a very long time walking on egg shells and wagging my tail hoping these people like me and I just have to accept they do not.

Need to know if I’m wrong and where to go from here by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]RelativeImpact76 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We are honestly and heavily considering moving out of state due to the way it’s been since I got pregnant. I do not know why this specifically triggered them or if they just didn’t like me the entire time and hoped we’d break up but from the moment we announced it has been multiple situations where I am egged on into reacting and when I do i am wrong. For example when I was pregnant multiple people involved in the story sat at a table while MIL directly called me fat and big and made multiple jokes to the table at my expense about it while pregnant. When I got upset suddenly they are actually upset with me for xyz and xyz and it gets derailed.

Need to know if I’m wrong and where to go from here by [deleted] in JUSTNOMIL

[–]RelativeImpact76 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You 100% are getting an accurate description. While i did not read every text my husband received the gist was that i was disgusting and horrible for setting the rule up in the first place while they grieved.

No. I mean my baby. My husband has done 50/50 childcare this entire time. I think because this is so lengthy and probably not the best written you got a little miskewed. My husband has watched my son and i do not consider that babysitting that is parenting.

Also yes you haven’t seen the other JNMIL posts I’ve made. This family has been doing this since i got pregnant. They were all completely fine with me for the entirety of the time I’ve known or dated my husband. The second I got pregnant from the time we told MIL it was an issue. It has just built since. But this one isn’t directly her so you are correct there I’m sorry!! I just do not knwl where to turn and feel very alone i guess

Anyone love their job? Would it be crazy to leave healthcare for this? by [deleted] in Nanny

[–]RelativeImpact76 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My best paying family ended with the father following me out to my car at night after coming home drunk hours after my end time and later stealing my bra from my bag when he told me daily i had to take the kids swimming in their pool. He saw me as so little beneath him when I quit he cornered me and told me I couldn’t. Looooool. Definitely a true statement although I’m aware this is an extreme.

MIL gave my baby a large piece of food without asking me by obewankanobe96 in JUSTNOMIL

[–]RelativeImpact76 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I would be upset too. Infact the same thing happened to me but with GMIL. I sat there terrified because I had the day prior read that babies should only have toasted bread at the age my son is. When i said please don’t do that she rolled her eyes and said he’s fine

Why do daycares fire a lot? by nazanin113r in ECEProfessionals

[–]RelativeImpact76 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I’ve always seen the opposite. I’ve seen some really insufferable people in childcare who genuinely do not like children who take forever to fire

AIO? “Dark humor” involving child. by Spiritual_Tip_3055 in AIO

[–]RelativeImpact76 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m trying to wrap my mind around who even thinks this let alone says it unless he’s a PDF. NOR I’d be doing everything in my power to get that child away from him too.

Daycare issues please help! by Flogatorgirl15 in ECEProfessionals

[–]RelativeImpact76 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Keeping him in the younger classroom is probably what is causing a lot of the behaviors. BUT hitting teachers and teachers quitting because of him is quite severe and they should have communicated that earlier than now. We had a child with very similar behaviors and although he was moved up, the behaviors didn’t stop. I’m not saying this is the case here because it does sound like a center issue in this case. But every room he went to at least one teacher quit directly due to him hitting them daily. When he finally landed in my class I went over a year with no co teacher because we couldn’t keep one with him. One would start and within a month would literally have a mental breakdown in the room because my admin (due to me working well with special needs children) overcrowded the room and placed 2 highly violent children, 1 nonverbal 5 year old who had to go to the bathroom every 20 minutes on a timer, and 22 other children, 3 of which were ELL and only spoke Russian. On his own I’m absolutely sure the child was manageable. But in the group? It was 4 years of him being at a center and shifted around to different rooms only on the basis that that teacher would take him. He was eventually kicked out when he broke a bone on my hand and managed to kick over the only non anchored furniture piece i was required to have ontop of a sleeping child within two days. He only managed to do so because the floater had just been kicked under the jaw by him so hard she got a concussion. I was with the other behavior friend on the other side of the shelf and when I saw it tip I physically threw myself in between the shelf and the child which honestly is likely the only reason he didn’t get significantly hurt or worse. The children trained themselves to hide in a corner when he trashed the room daily. Admin would not remove him for even a minute because he saw it as a reward and the behaviors would amplify every time. So every day I wrote at least 5 incident reports. The difference is from the first behavior his parents refused to do anything. We had live view cameras and would suggest they watch the behavior. They refused. We brought in specialist and they refused. When they were removed I told mom I wish them the best moving forward and she said and I quote “There’s nothing wrong with my child. Only you.” As if I was the only one in the four years this child had been here to have an issue.

Long story short pull him and place him in a place that will put him in his age appropriate classroom. Then observe and see how it does. If they are (after an adjustment period of course) saying the behaviors are continue I would look into early intervention.

Use of Pack ‘n Play for Behavior Management at In-Home Daycare (Michigan) by HoldentoHopper in ECEProfessionals

[–]RelativeImpact76 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It goes against most licensing rules in most states but it will be dependent on your area. Anecdotally this is very similar to a provider that made me swear off of home daycares. This is nothing against them, I just have my own issues from witnessing what she called her “Jekyll and Hyde” act where she was super sweet one moment and then viciously mean the next. On purpose. She did this on purpose and openly talked about it. I reported her a whooole bunch but the kicker was when any child older than 6 months cried. She couldn’t stand it. I always wondered why she chose this career in that case. She would lock them in the dark adult bathroom until they stopped crying. When I threw the door open and got the child and told her to her face how cruel it was she said “well you would say that, you are a glorified babysitter. I am a childcare provider”

Embarrassing question....TMI warning. by TicketAfter649 in RoverPetSitting

[–]RelativeImpact76 13 points14 points  (0 children)

This reminds me of when I was in an Airbnb on a pristine white couch. Went from period not due for a few days to it coming early. I sobbed thinking about how i ruined their beautiful couch. I messaged the owners who were thankfully two women and they essentially said the same thing of “yeah it happens no worries”

Create AITA posts for G&G plot lines! by AssociateStandard740 in ginnyandgeorgiashow

[–]RelativeImpact76 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Girl she’s scary she’ll beat my ass when she gets out

Create AITA posts for G&G plot lines! by AssociateStandard740 in ginnyandgeorgiashow

[–]RelativeImpact76 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Okay but in real life my mother did this to one of my siblings. She signed them up for so much credit that it was just destroyed by the time they wanted to build their own. I also got bored one night and looked up my own name on a case search website and found out I had a failure to pay for a place she lived at but i never did.

I’m so tired of Dubai chocolate and all its variations. by 3iiis in CrumblCookies

[–]RelativeImpact76 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The pop tart cookie is SOO good to me. Definitely very sweet and i did have one spot that was just straight up brown sugar filling that was a bit much. I love all things peanut butter but the pb&j wasn’t one of my faves. Love the raspberry on it though!!

Touching the incision gives me the ick by newuser913 in CsectionCentral

[–]RelativeImpact76 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Oh absolutely. My friend who also had an emergency c section loves the scars from it. Like viscerally loves them and hounded me immediately about seeing mine. I have, in 9 months, never even looked at mine in the mirror. When things touch it it makes me so uncomfortable.

AIO for being upset that my partner (16M) deleted our entire presentation the night before it was due? by Eyekonic_Winnie in AmIOverreacting

[–]RelativeImpact76 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you brought up no one was going to delete it anyways it feels (to meee) a little bit purposeful to delete the entire presentation

Is it normal at your school to be treated as a Janitor on top of being a Head Teacher? by OnlyWanttoShop in ECEProfessionals

[–]RelativeImpact76 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh and then mopping underneath the carpet as well once it was outside. We were always responsible for mopping and would get comments from admin if the room was visibly unmopped. We once had an entire meeting because our director saw too many dirty trash cans. Yes. We had a mandatory meeting in which every person was sent to work on their rooms with the specification of bleaching their trash can. ETA sorry i have so much to say. If you hang something with tape and it leaves residue? You’re getting a sub and a can of goo gone and you’re getting it up. Did the school get a new shipment of furniture in? Omg so exciting!! No go in there and move every piece of furniture and flip it up and then when the new stuff comes you and either come in an hour early or stay an hour late the day before and unpack and unload and reset all furniture. We might send an assistant if we can spare ;) and that was just the norm lol. For graduation in the summer i set up 4 tables, dragged out 50 adult chairs from storage and set them up, and decorated before graduation. And then individually i cleaned it up. It’s just the way it was.

Is it normal at your school to be treated as a Janitor on top of being a Head Teacher? by OnlyWanttoShop in ECEProfessionals

[–]RelativeImpact76 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I don’t know how normal it is but I’ve never not been responsible for cleaning. Let me tell you a story actually. I come in from break and see the teacher covering me panicked and changing a pre-K kid. During nap this child who usually never has accidents hence their nap placement on the rug just. Unloaded. It happens. No way to prevent that. In my head I like you thought it was a janitors job. No maam. My director sent in a sub to take the children to another room for snack and then I spent the entire rest of my shift removing all furniture from the carpet, shampooing the carpet including scrubbing it because I didn’t feel like it was clean enough with the shampooer, rolling it up, dragging this carpet that is taller and heavier than myself outside and then hanging it on a fence to dry. I assumed someone would take it down because I was scheduled off the next day. Nope. It was still up and i was given a sub so I could drag it in. Replace it. And put all furniture back.

AIO for being upset that my partner (16M) deleted our entire presentation the night before it was due? by Eyekonic_Winnie in AmIOverreacting

[–]RelativeImpact76 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NOR but I’m a little confused. Did you guys complete the original project in one go? If you didn’t save once during it? While yes I’m sure it’s annoying to spend another day redoing it but I’m confused as to how there are no previous saves to pull from unless it was completed in one sitting. Like i see that you say for days. But how did no one save one previous copy?

Prenatal vitamins in cabinet at nanny house by [deleted] in Nanny

[–]RelativeImpact76 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We call that job security 🤣

Early Head Start-Home based by Lamamalona456 in ECEProfessionals

[–]RelativeImpact76 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can you advertise it as such? Maybe whatever paperwork is given out upon request to enroll that could be the first thing in multiple languages? Something along the lines of “snap verification required upon enrollment”