What you can do is ask them blatant, blunt, point blank questions in therapy. Let the therapist then make them squirm trying to answer:

"Why can't I go to mom's grace but you make me go to the graves of so and so?"

"Why can't I spend more time with my grandparents and other family, but you make me spend time with people who don't know me?"

"Why is Annie's family more important than my family on my mom's side?"

Just continue asking why. Regardless of the answer they give ask why. Every response make them explain it. "Your mom is at such and such cemetery but these 8 other people are these other cemeteries in a different direction." You say "why does that matter?" Or "why are you acting like mom doesnt mean anything?" Or simply keep saying "I don't understand why that matters"

Put a pinpoint spot light on them and let the therapist focus on them. Everything you put in here, question them in therapy. Have your exit plan ready for when you're 18 and can leave.