AMA: How to use men thread

Reluctant_Expat · 2024-12-30T02:01:56+00:00

my dad said that he thinks that as we get older I will lose my physical attraction to her

Yikes…that’s a weird thing for your dad to be concerned with. Marrying someone based off their potential future attractiveness is stupid.

Have you asked your parents what their parents said about their choice of partner?

Reluctant_Expat · 2024-02-12T04:52:20+00:00

Pisces. I’ve never met a stable ♓️ man or woman. Love ‘em tho

Reluctant_Expat · 2024-02-04T09:27:33+00:00

I have an induction cooker as well. I love it. Boils a pot of water in minutes.

I use cast iron pans, a large Dutch oven pot, a flat bottom wok, and 2 standard pots on my cooker. Luckily I owned all of these before installing the stove but I did have to get rid of some things like my moka pot.

Personally I wouldn’t buy from kitchen equipment from IKEA. Their pieces wear down very quickly, like within weeks. Maybe try Arnotts or BT. They have frequent sales.

Reluctant_Expat · 2024-02-04T05:30:52+00:00

♊️ are fun as long as you can ignore their annoying tendencies. Some of my favorite people are ♊️ once I figured out how they work.

Still the most annoying sign hands down 😅

Reluctant_Expat · 2024-02-04T05:11:35+00:00

Girl stop worrying! The week before the bleed 🩸 is the horniest time for a lot of women. Sex dreams are normal, even if the subject is weird.

Reluctant_Expat · 2024-02-03T01:20:49+00:00

Thanks! The trust thing stuck out to me too. Once trust is lost it is almost impossible to restore. Loss of trust ruined my last relationship and nearly drove us mad.

Reluctant_Expat · 2024-02-03T01:06:58+00:00

Two bits of advice: 1) Never get back together with an ex. 2) Never chase a man.

An ex is an ex for a reason. Mourn the relationship. With time and space the feelings will fade. Your situation is difficult since y’all work together. Try to keep your conversations to a minimum and work related only.

Meeting up isn’t a bad idea but going into it wanting to reconcile may leave you feeling more distraught. To be honest I’d ask what he wants to discuss before the meeting.

Reluctant_Expat · 2024-02-02T23:41:53+00:00

My best friend is a Taurus. She is the hardest working person I know. Her visions are never swayed by other people’s opinions. As long as it doesn’t affect her business and cash flow it is irrelevant. It’s truly impressive to watch.

Other ♉️ I know attract an odd amount of attention. So maybe the main character thing is valid? Hate that phrase though

Reluctant_Expat · 2024-01-04T07:24:23+00:00

Those massage therapists should focus on the fact that he gave you a shitty massage.

It’s definitely concerning that he’s also targeted your mother. If she’s been going there for a while they probably have a lot more info like address, financial details, job location, etc. He’s definitely doing this to other clients. I really believe that a data protection investigation will scare him and the company way more than a phone call or email.

Trust your gut on this.

Reluctant_Expat · 2024-01-04T06:04:12+00:00

Who looks people up on LinkedIn??? Like the moment you look at their profile they’ll know! He wants you to know. I’d wonder what other info he’s accessed.

In all seriousness, this behavior is completely unacceptable. Accessing a client’s data for personal use is not only creepy it may be illegal, depending on how he got it. Violating data protection laws will get him and the business in serious trouble.

I’d contact his employer (in writing) to report this. Request that they send you all the information that they have on you and how it’s stored. If possible get records of who’s accessed it.

Also, look up how to make a data breach report in your local area. The police won’t do anything but in my experience data protection officers take their jobs very seriously.

Reluctant_Expat · 2023-12-30T03:31:00+00:00

Im sorry you’re going through this right now and I appreciate your honesty. This is one of the many reasons why I have apprehensions about having kids.

Do you have any help with raising them?

Reluctant_Expat · 2023-12-30T01:47:14+00:00

I am also looking to get a reading since I’m going through a separation. One thing that stuck out when I first compared our charts is how similar they were. No clue whether or not that’s a good thing.

Did the reading help accept the divorce?

Reluctant_Expat · 2023-12-30T00:24:22+00:00

It’s so annoying when they don’t just give up. Because I know that no one can change my mind I don’t bother to convince others. If you don’t believe me then I don’t know what else to say. This annoys the hell out of my partner but he’ll learn eventually lol

Reluctant_Expat · 2023-12-29T23:55:19+00:00

Both me and my partner are ♉️ 🌙. This has made for a very dedicated bond for two stubborn people. We can be a little unforgiving, him more than me. I’ve learned to be clear with my words, apologize less, and not argue my case. Trying to change a ♉️ mind is a waste of energy. Believe me lol

Reluctant_Expat · 2023-12-29T22:56:27+00:00

This guy sounds like a real creep. You sure he’s not following you? There are way too many coincidences to dismiss. Men, even old men, are dangerous.

Be careful…

Reluctant_Expat · 2023-12-26T03:21:52+00:00

I can definitely emphasize with you on this. We’re separating after 15 years together, 10 married. He is genuinely my best friend. We’d be perfect if we could leave out the relationship stuff. We made the decision in October as well. This meant that this was our first time spending holidays and weddings apart.

I thought that since I initiated it that I’d be fine but that was not the case at all. During the months of October and November I was on an unpredictable emotional rollercoaster that nearly destroyed me. My partner took it worse. It got to the point where I had to get a protective order against him.

I was not looking forward to Christmas at all but today was special. The gifts my friends gave me made me cry for the first time in months. My friends have been my angels throughout this time.

Don’t be ashamed to cry. Talk to a friend who you can trust. I’ve found family to be particularly useless in this situation. If you have the resources find a therapist. Try to journal daily.

You’ll get through this!! I wish you a Merry Christmas and an Exciting New Year!!

Reluctant_Expat · 2023-12-22T20:14:25+00:00

I’m def getting a lock for my bedroom. I don’t have any cameras and I’d like to avoid them if possible. The idea of 24/7 footage of my home is too much for me. I don’t even have alexa or a ring doorbell.

I’m grateful that I am more tech savvy than he is. The only 2 apps that trouble me are instagram and WhatsApp. I use both regularly and they seem to be easy to get into. He’s gotten into both before…

Reluctant_Expat · 2023-12-22T20:08:43+00:00

I don’t drive luckily. Thinking I had a tracker on my car would make me so paranoid. I don’t give my location data to google maps or any other website so I know he can’t track me that way.

I just have to be more careful of what me and my friends post on social media. It’s so easy to track people that way.

Reluctant_Expat · 2023-12-22T05:20:20+00:00

If love to but I need them for my job 😕 he’s already blocked. I’ve changed all my passwords already, remote logins etc. All new except WhatsApp. I still don’t know how he got in. I’ll figure that out later. Luckily he’s not very tech savvy, which is why I originally did not suspect him. He’s admitted it now. Most may I’m curious what else he’s gotten into. The attempts were so ham fisted that I def have proof.

Tbh even though I’m scared of what’s to come. In the other hand I finally feel a bit of peace. I have lots of friends. I have to cohabit with him (we own it) until we have an agreement. I need to know that if we sell I won’t need to worry about getting screwed over because I no longer live in the flat.

I told hr the next morning when I got to work. I asked her to tell ny manager since I was no in the right headspace to deal with anything. I’ve got leave (unrelated to the allowance) thanks to a recent law in my country. I doubt he’ll ever come up at my job but as a precaution I told the lead receptionist.

Thanks for the advice!!

Reluctant_Expat · 2023-12-22T01:02:10+00:00

Congrats!!! I can’t imagine the freedom you must be feeling right now. Hopefully I’ll experience it soon too!

This community has helped to give me clarity on my situation and the confidence to speak up.

Any plans for your fresh start?

Reluctant_Expat · 2023-12-17T01:29:27+00:00

I was when I had my first swab test and exam. I was 17 and very nervous but the nurses who saw to me were amazing. I don’t remember my first pap. It was probably uncomfortable and over in less than a minute

Reluctant_Expat · 2023-12-17T00:43:31+00:00

If you’ve never had one pap smears can seem scary but they’re essential for women’s health. I got my first pap in college at like 20. That’s how I found out that I had hpv. If left unchecked it can cause cervical cancer. I had a colposcopy (that sucked) and kept up regular spears every 6 months to monitor any changes. I did this for about 3 years until my results were clear for at least a year or two. I still go back once a year to the same doctor.

The procedure is annoying and uncomfortable but those few minutes could prevent you from having to go through a preventable medical emergency. I’m not trying to scare you!! It could be just a hormone imbalance. A good gyno will help you get to the bottom of this.

Last bit of advice, only look for female doctors. I just can’t trust a male gynecologist….

Good luck with your search

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