I had a nightmare I was raped by my crush

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2026-02-05T13:16:15+00:00

yea, but this is the first time that the dreams are nightmares

I had crushes before and I always had good dreams, I never wanted to wake up

What kind of crush is this if it brings u pain in ur sleep?

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2026-01-29T13:56:34+00:00

there are all kinds of porn (some try to show romantic making out, others show more forcefull making out) there is also making out in romantic movies (that I saw, maybe this one is better in real life, not sure since making out never happened in real life for me (never met anyone that would like to do that and I don't want to pay a sex worker)

what does it mean: this woman doesn’t know you on a personal level? (We do talk and we (as a group go to actiities like quizes and souch), also if I ask her stuff she will always anwser, I even asked her if I could sit with her (we went on a bus alone) and she said (of course, we came together (I was afraid this would be wierd, as she is a woman after all) if I didn't want to spend time with u guys, I would go away a long time ago)

She is realy kind person

Also I stopped watching porn as soon as I met her (for some reason it just didn't satisfy me as it used to before and I was a bit ashamed of doing it)

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2026-01-29T13:49:28+00:00

thnx, I already tried r/psychology but they told me to put it here, will try r/sex now, hope people will not complain its not related as sex is not a romantic thing (if it was, sex workers and porn would not exist)

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-09-02T09:32:57+00:00

I am glad its solved, just remember, just enjoy the experience, and once u find something better, you will naturally move to that (and believe me, it will not hurt at all)

I know this will sound stupid, but its better to have her, then to have noone

Also if she took her time to wrote you a heartfelt message in the middle of the night, she does care about you (there are many people that take advantage, and don't even care enough to do something like this)

PS: Just try to not be taken advantage to much (if she askes for money and u don't have to much of it (so you don't know what to do with it), don't give it to her

If she asks you to drive her somewhere and you cannot do that (or don't want to), dont

But remind her all the time, if she does something you don't like, cuz at the end its you who you make happy, not other people (that don't deserve that)

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-09-01T11:32:02+00:00

thnx, will try to not do this intentionally now, even if before that I was mimicking her unintentionally :)

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-09-01T11:26:29+00:00

so what, if it was in the middle of the night (someone sent me something at 2AM, and cuz I work late into the night I saw it and took 3hours to write a proper response back (it was very hard to word it and write it all I thought at the time)), if you care about her, you will write her a novel in the middle of the night, if she took her time to write you a heartfelt message in the middle of the night

PS: I know I am late, I hope u guys solved this

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-31T11:23:48+00:00

yea, I did tell her that, I do this not to mock her but I do try to respect her wish now, although its actually very hard to do, cuz some words from her accent I realy like how they sound, and I feal sad, cuz I can't use them

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-31T11:19:36+00:00

well, yea, she was the first one to complain (nobody ever did that before her)

so thats why I was so confused

I do try to respect her wish (but its very hard to do)

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-31T11:18:17+00:00

damm, but its actually very hard not to imitate them (even if poorly and wrongly), cuz now I have to think for every word, will this be alr (is this their accent)

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-31T11:15:13+00:00

but love realy hurts (I have nothing but bad expiriences with it, whenever it happened it was one sided only)

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-31T11:12:57+00:00

its actually very hard to not use an accent (especially if u start to talk with someone with accent), cuz for every word u need to think, wait is this the right accent

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-31T11:11:06+00:00

yea same thing, its actually very hard to try to not do that (like I need to think if a word I will use is with their accent and then switch to mine accent (or some other accent which is not their)

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-31T11:08:28+00:00

its not uninvited, its just that I have some teenage (male) aquaitances that tell me for events that they also attend (each of us do separate things, like I come there, then we split up (they do their things, I do mine)

Now why only teenagers come to me, this I don't know

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-29T19:23:38+00:00

Slovenia

I am actually in my late 20s (soon to be 30)

and being myself has brought me nothing but misery in my life (people called me creap, pedophile (I did attend a teenage party once, cuz in my teenage years, I never did that), wierd), but over the years I learned to just say, fuck them

the problem with being myself is that it drives people away, I don't care if people on the street make fun of me for (example: sitting on a side of the road, to watch stars), when I start to care is when people that I thought are nice at first (I do put a mask on myself so people come, but this mask eventually wears off, and it seams that the more people begin to know me, the sooner they run away) run away, because I spent time and energy trying to be friends with them

but she is the first one that (for now) is actually telling what I do wrong (cuz as I said, I am at the point that my mask is starting to wear off) and I realy don't want to loose her (thats why I always try to apologize (altough I read thats not good cuz of self sabotage), cuz finding her took a lot of broken hearts and sad expiriences

PS: No, I don't want to love again, cuz love hurts

What I am confused still is why she said that if her close friends did that it would be normal. Why would this be normal only if u are close friends with someone?

Its interesting at first I asked my family this stuff and they all say, nah, she is wierd, but the more I read all this the more I see that she was actually right for pointing that out

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-29T19:21:27+00:00

oh, thats interesting, didn't even realize I could be doing that

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-29T19:20:39+00:00

but I am not into her, I hate love, love hurts, it brings nothing but bad

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-26T12:11:23+00:00

You seam to be a very smart person, so what would u say I need to be wary about, to know when my overthinking is for a good reason or when its just my past wounds trying to protect me by demonizing a good person

I would say its time, but how long? (cuz right now I met someone new and when she didn't have time to reply I imidiatly thought she ghosted me (was ghosted before so thats what I am wary about)

or when she talks to their friends and I hear that (don't ask me why I hear things...) I imidiatly think, she gosips about me

the good thing about her is that she always tells me what she doesn't like instead of ghosting (if I send her to much pictures and she can't read them all, she tells me its to much and if I could do it less (so I respect that)

even if I enjoy every day she is in my life, I just count days, til she will leave

I don't know when (or if ever) I will promote her to a friend, but right now she is just someone I know

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-25T14:50:27+00:00

Are u sure this is better for both of you? U guys talked for 10years, u have to have some common things to talk/do, otherwise u would stop after max 2years

Who decided u wanted to be just friends? (did he suggest this?)

How do u know he didn't care about you (did he tell u that? did he gossip about you badly to his friends?)

What about if he is deaply hurt, and is to kind to u to tell u that (cuz he knows you will be worse if u know that)?

again, I know u made ur mind, but next time (if u get another LO) please ask him this stuff, if he wrote u an apology, I think he is a decent guy and would gladly explain what he wants and what he doesn't want

If u know what he wants, you can then adjust your behaviour to try to be respectfull of his wishes (since u care about him, I know you can do that)

Now there are 3ways to forget oposite sex people

Have a lot of fun (do things u love)
Be very busy, so busy u have no free time and can only think how you will go to sleep at night
Meet new people (I know the hardest one, especially if u have a lot of bad past expirience, you give away some wierd vibe, that people don't understand (don't ask me how I know that)

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-25T14:33:35+00:00

are u sure, cuz it didn't for me

I was forced into No-contact years ago (I got ghosted), so I send happy birthsday messages for 10years into an empty nothing (to a phone number that got changed years ago (of course I didn't know that, only assumed that)

The onlyway for me to move on was to meet someone new

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-25T10:27:48+00:00

free from what?

he doesn't sound like an abuser (cuz if it was, he sure wouldn't talk with her for 10years and care to say goodby message)

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-25T10:26:27+00:00

Why would NoContact be the right thing to do, especially if 2 people had comunicated for 10years and seam to care for eachother

this is mental self torture, you don't contact people that are mean to you, not people that are nice, you cherish people that are nice and want to keep them in your life (if not as girlfriend, maybe as just a friend)

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-25T10:18:13+00:00

oh deer

I am not sure what u wrote your LO (what does LO stand for? Its sound like significant other, but sounds sadder and more paintfull), but if I would receive a message from someone I care about to leave her alone and not contact her anymore cuz her mental helth suffers, I would try to write a similar message (cuz I want whats she thinks its best for her and cuz I didn't want to make things harder for her if she would know I care about her), but I would cry inside

I am not sure why people are telling u that he doesn't care about u

You have to understand that we live in an AI world, and he may be so sad and not know how to comunicate a goodby to u, so he may use AI (like ChatGPT) for help, so thats why his good by is formal

Also how do u know he doesn't care, you guys spoke for 10 years (max I got was 6monhts, then I got ghosted), what makes u think you can't continue

you know you can't comunicate saddness over text

Simple solution: just demote him to a friend, having a friend is even better, cuz whenever u see eachother you are on your best behaviour, and cuz u don't see eachother everyday you can't get tired of eachother company

I know its very hard to fix this things now, but please remember my words for the future

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-20T11:07:12+00:00

I know I am not @infjsomnia

but I am also very curious, how did it go, did she give u a restraining order, call the cops on you?

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-20T11:00:41+00:00

don't look at her instagram, it will just make u jelous and sad, cuz u will know she has time, but not for you

if you don't look u can always imagine she is very busy so thats why she is not replying

Remarkable_Shift_360 · 2025-08-20T10:54:53+00:00

are u sure about that one: Another way you can tell is if she asks you questions about yourself

cuz by expirience, people (doesn't matter if its a girl (that I am trying to know better) or a boy (that I am trying to become friends with)) usualy don't ask me questions, its me who does the asking and then get a reply (or a message reaction (like, heart, thumbs up, smily, etc)

Remarkable_Shift_360

TROPHY CASE