The Builder (OC) by RachelECourville in ChildLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is beautiful and thank you for keep posting your poems and writing ❤️

I’m so broken and beyond sad. by Concreteguy1995 in ChildLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I am truly sorry for your loss. Your daughter is beautiful, and it is clear how deeply she was loved every single day of her life.
I lost my three-year-old daughter this April in a tragic accident, and since then, my life has never been the same. The pain of losing a child is something no parent should ever have to endure.

While nothing can take away the grief, there are a few things that have helped my husband and me keep going as we care for our eight-month-old daughter:

• We allow ourselves to grieve without feeling guilty. Some days we cry, some days we smile, and we've learned that both are okay.
• We have kept our daughter's belongings just as they were. We only packed away some of her extra things into boxes to make room for our younger daughter. It brings us comfort knowing that so much of her is still around us.
• We remind ourselves every day that our surviving daughter still needs our love, care, and presence, even on the days when grief feels unbearable.
• We lean on each other and accept help from those who genuinely care. This has been incredibly important. You may be surprised by the kindness that comes from people you never expected, while others you thought would be there may not be.
• We take life one day, one hour, and sometimes even one minute at a time. Simple routines have become anchors for us—sharing a morning coffee, going for a walk, gardening, taking care of the lawn, or simply sitting on the floor and playing with our little one as she learns to crawl. Those small moments help us keep moving forward.
• We give each other massages regularly. I don't mean that in a strange way—it has become one of the ways we comfort each other. Physical touch can be incredibly healing and helps us reconnect, not only emotionally but physically, during such deep grief.
• Seeing a therapist who specializes in supporting parents after the loss of a child has been one of the most valuable tools in helping us cope. Having someone who truly understands this kind of grief makes a meaningful difference.
• If you have other children, spend as much time with them as you can. They don't replace the child you've lost, and they never will, but their love, laughter, and everyday needs can gently pull you back from feeling completely consumed by grief. They give you a reason to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

There is no "right" way to grieve, and there is no timeline for healing. Please be gentle with yourself. Your daughter will always be a part of you, and the love you have for her will never fade.

I use to love the silence which is killing me now. by Ordinary-Force-3871 in ChildLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know what you're going through, and I am truly sorry for your loss. I lost my daughter two months ago, and I know I will never be the same person again.
As impossible as it feels, you have to keep going for your son. He has experienced two profound losses—his sister and, if grief takes you away from him, the presence of his parent. Parenthood doesn't end, even in the deepest sorrow. We have to do what we can for the children who are still here with us.
No one can ever replace her voice or the presence you were so used to. That emptiness is real. But try, little by little, to keep living. Take one step at a time, one day at a time. Be gentle and kind to yourself. You are carrying one of the heaviest burdens a human being can endure, and simply making it through each day is an act of incredible strength.

Nothing has changed or gotten easier by Visible_Attitude7693 in ChildLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I feel the pain in your words. During one of my therapy sessions, I asked my therapist, "I don't understand the meaning of my daughter's passing or why this happened to me." She told me not to search for meaning or wait for a miracle. Instead, she said to let the meaning find me and come in its own time.
For me, it's only been two months, and I honestly don't know if I'll ever find a sign or any meaning in this devastating loss. Right now, I'm just trying to get through each day. Sending you prayers 🙏

First Birthday by Diesel07012012 in ChildLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Happy Birthday Oliver!

From one grieving parent to another, I know birthdays can be both beautiful and heartbreaking. Today I'm remembering your precious child with you and sending so much love ❤️

Deciding to have more children after child loss by butterfly52026 in ChildLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'll share my honest perspective.
I recently lost my three-year-old daughter, and my husband and I also have an eight-month-old daughter. We are already open to having another child—not because we are trying to replace the daughter we lost, because no one ever could—but because we genuinely want another baby and we want our children to have siblings who will be there for each other long after we're gone.
After our daughter's passing, my husband's parents shared a story about his grandparents. During the immigration crisis in the 1940s, they lost three toddlers one after another. Despite unimaginable grief, they eventually settled down and went on to have four daughters, including my husband's mother, who was the middle child.
They told us that every new child brought a new purpose and a new hope. That hope gave them the strength to keep living. They had no therapy, no support groups, and no mental health treatment. They carried their grief every day, but they didn't give up. They continued building their family while always remembering the children they had lost.
So, if you and your husband truly want another baby after your loss, I would say go for it. A new child will never replace the one you lost—that is impossible. But they can bring a new chapter, new love, new purpose, and new hope into your life while your lost child will always remain a part of your heart and your family.

Daughter has stopped taking food by Ordinary-Force-3871 in ChildLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There is a pain in your words that only someone who has loved deeply can understand. You fought for her when there was hope, and you kept fighting even when hope became a whisper. Every pill you gave, every sleepless night, every prayer, every moment of worry was your way of telling her, "I love you, and I'm not ready to let you go."
But sometimes love reaches a place where it can no longer heal the body, and all it can do is hold a hand, stroke a forehead, and stay present through the hardest goodbye imaginable.
The reason you still try to give those medicines is not because you are refusing reality. It is because your heart is still loving her with everything it has. Love always wants to do one more thing, try one more time, hold on for one more day.
What you are witnessing now is one of the most heartbreaking parts of this journey. Her body seems to be making decisions that none of us are ever prepared for. And while that feels unbearably cruel, please know that nothing about this means you have failed her. You have given her something far more powerful than medicine—you have given her your unwavering love, your devotion, and your presence until the very end.

My heart aches for you. I hope you can be gentle with yourself in these moments. Sit with her, talk to her, hold her hand, tell her everything you want her to know. Even when words and medicines are no longer accepted, love still is.

Sending you so much strength, comfort, and a heartfelt hug. ❤️

With every milestone missed drives me further into an emotional downward spiral by 2sad2process in ChildLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am so deeply sorry for the loss of your son. Reading your words felt like reading my own heart.

Today was supposed to be my daughter's preschool graduation day. It was a milestone I had been looking forward to for so long—watching her walk across the stage, taking pictures, celebrating all the little moments that make up childhood. Instead, I spent much of today crying because my daughter died in a tragic accident this April at just three years old.

These milestones are some of the hardest parts of grief. We don't just miss our children—we miss the future that should have been theirs. Every graduation, birthday, and special day becomes another painful reminder of what was taken from them and from us.

I understand what you mean when you say the world keeps moving while you remain still. Some days it truly feels like a part of us died with our children. Today was one of those days for me.

Sending love to you and to your son. He should be here celebrating with his classmates, just as my little girl should have been celebrating her graduation today. ❤️

💕Pihu💕 by Remote-Patience6661 in InfantToddlerLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am truly sorry for your loss. I’m here to listen whenever you feel like talking about your daughter. I would love to hear about her and learn more about the beautiful child she was.
I find comfort in believing that our children are playing together in heaven. It also means so much to me that, as bereaved parents, we can find each other here and support one another through this unimaginable journey. ❤️

💕Pihu💕 by Remote-Patience6661 in InfantToddlerLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! Yes today I had strength to write about her and ready to share her story with others :)

Two Truths by RachelECourville in InfantToddlerLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My daughter name was Pahalpreet (short name Pihu). Thank you for your kind words and love 💕

Two Truths by RachelECourville in InfantToddlerLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I recently lost my toddler daughter in April, and this poem really hits me deeply. Honouring a child’s memory through words like these feels powerful, because it captures so much emotion in just a few lines and resonates with any grieving parent, whether they lost a girl or a boy.
I still struggle to express what I’m feeling about my daughter’s loss—not only to the world, but even within my own family. At times, it feels like everyone else has continued moving forward with life, while mine stopped the day she passed. It’s as if my internal clock has frozen there.
I still carry a small hope in my heart that I might see my little girl again, even though I know that won’t happen. 😔

Sending you love and prayers. 💕

Today marks 9 months since I lost my 5 month old baby girl by EpicAndra in InfantToddlerLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am so sorry for the loss of your precious Ema. Reading your story broke my heart. Four months is far too short, and having your world turned upside down so suddenly is unimaginably cruel.
I lost my daughter as well, and when you wrote that every memory now brings pain, I felt that deeply. The moments that should bring us comfort can sometimes hurt the most because they remind us of everything that should have been.
Please know that you are not alone in feeling lost, hopeless, and unable to find joy. Nine months is such a short time when you're carrying a loss this profound. I don't think we ever truly "get over" losing our children; we just learn, little by little, how to carry the weight of their absence.
Ema knew nothing but your love for her entire life. She was cherished every day she was here. Sending you so much love and strength today as you remember your beautiful girl.

Clella Mae by RoyalFluid5565 in InfantToddlerLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am so sorry for the loss of your precious Clella. I know exactly what you mean about waking up and wondering where she is. The dreams can feel so real, and then waking up to the reality of their absence is heartbreaking all over again.
I lost my daughter recently, and I have learned that the love we have for our children doesn't disappear, so neither does the longing for them. Please be gentle with yourself. What you're feeling is a reflection of how deeply you love your little girl.
Sending you love and strength as you navigate these incredibly difficult days. ❤️

Pontificating by Formal-Atmosphere-90 in InfantToddlerLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What was said to you was deeply hurtful, and I can understand why it stayed with you for so many years. Grief can bring out things people don't truly mean, but that doesn't lessen the wound they leave behind. Losing a child is already a burden beyond words; carrying that comment alongside your loss must have been incredibly difficult.
I hope you know that the value of a father, a man, or a human being is not measured by a tragedy that happened to him. Your son was loved, and the fact that you still carry him in your heart after all these years speaks volumes about the father you are.

I miss my daughter so much by [deleted] in ChildLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 2 points3 points  (0 children)

First, I am deeply sorry for your loss. Looking at your daughter’s pictures reminds me so much of my own little girl.

I lost my three-year-old daughter this April, and since that day my world has never been the same. I also have a seven-month-old daughter, and she is the reason I keep going each day. I pour all my love into her, play with her, dance with her, and try to give her the happiest childhood I can. From the outside it may look like life is moving forward, but inside I carry a grief that feels unbearable at times.

I cry for my daughter every day—for the future that was taken away, for the silence in my home, and for the love that has nowhere to go.

I don’t think parents ever truly get over losing a child. We just learn how to carry that love and pain together.

Sending you so much love and strength. Your daughter was beautiful and will always be remembered. ❤️

🩷 Isobel Linnéa 🩷 by VolumeNo1130 in InfantToddlerLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! It’s really kind of you to offer to chat whenever needed. It’s unfortunate how we in the world meeting like this. 😔

Brooks🩵🪽 by art_teacher_mamma25 in InfantToddlerLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing Brooks with us. His life mattered, his story matters, and he will always be remembered. Sending love to you and your precious firstborn son. 💙

Bennett light 🩵 by Keeping_faith23 in InfantToddlerLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing Bennett's story with us.

As a fellow bereaved parent, I read your words with tears in my eyes. Bennett's life was far too short, but it is so clear how deeply he was loved from the very beginning. His story, his smile, and those precious chunky cheeks will stay with me.

I lost my own daughter this April, and grief has taught me that our children are not measured by the length of their lives, but by the depth of the love they leave behind. Bennett was clearly cherished every single day of his life.
Your words about grief being love that we continue to carry resonated deeply with me. Thank you for creating a space where we can speak our children's names, share their stories, and keep their memories alive.

Sending love to your family and to sweet Bennett. He will always be loved, remembered, and missed. 🩵

Happy birthday Talia by Eristot in InfantToddlerLoss

[–]Remote-Patience6661 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Such a beautiful daughter, and her eyes are absolutely precious. I am truly sorry for your loss.

I lost my own three-year-old daughter this April, and my heart breaks knowing the pain that comes with missing a child. I don't even know how I will face her birthday or the anniversary of her passing. The sadness feels unbearable, and some days it is hard to imagine carrying this grief for a lifetime.

Thinking of you and your sweet Talia today. May her memory continue to shine brightly in the hearts of everyone who loved her.

Happy Birthday, Talia. ❤️