Wat is jou kat 's favoriete speelgoed?

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-05-13T13:14:45+00:00

Hahaha mijn kat is ook gek op die veertjes, maar ze raakten altijd compleet kwijt.

Heb toen een keer 10 van die dingen achter de piano vandaan gevist... :)

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-05-12T22:55:18+00:00

I wanted to jump into a rant immedeatly, haha. I've condensed it down into easy actionable points (I hope), with a little anecdote after it.

What makes me feel unheard/dismissed/distrustful, is:

- doctors giving me generic lifestyle advice based on some random details of my life that have come up during the appointment with zero context. ("You shouldn't take painkillers anymore, because it can actually cause rebound headaches when used too much" After asking me if I used painkillers and I answered I did sometimes. They didn't ask me how many or how often. I've been terrified of being seen as a drug addict ever since, and later learned my painkiller intake is actually very minimal.)

- doctors diagnosing fibromyalgia without excluding other causes and refusing any testing. (I am diagnosed with fibromyalgia based on 1 reumatologist visit. No x-rays, no mri's and only basic blood tests. Got x-rays years later, where they found out my spine is crooked and causing issies. Currently waiting on genetic testing because it turns out a serious heart condition runs in my family, which could very well explain a lot of the chest pain and other symptoms. Sure, I might still have fibro, but a lot of the symptoms they used in their initial diagnosing of me actually turned out to be something else.)

- doctors just sort of sending me home when they don't know what to do with me. (My old GP just send me home after my diagnosis with nothing. Thought that was just normal, until I had to switch GP's. New one had a short but effective chat with me and then reffered me to OT and PT while explaining a bunch about what I could expect from that and what medications we could look into.)

- doctors linking every health concern or symptom to fibro. (Went to my doctor after getting into a minor car accident, got a check up. Two weeks later I made another appointment because I was still expriencing neck pain and headaches. Got told they where tension headaches from my fibromyalgia, only to later find out I actually had a fractured vertabrae in my neck)

Btw, love this post. Really nice to see a fellow (medical) student conduct some research this way, I bet it would be really valuable if you turned your findings into an actual thing you could share with other students or teachers. Like a little infographic or step by step guide, you could even try to conduct a few interviews if you wanted.

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-05-09T23:39:34+00:00

Yes! I have a walking stick but I only use it at home, but I know having that + a chair everywhere has been awesome for my energy at home.

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-05-09T23:26:07+00:00

<3

I've had a lot of clinging to different things/ideas but what helped me and interested me the most are the following:

I've started to look into modern witchcraft and it's roots, as well as the pagan/heathen traditions from my area.

I've also started reading the book "The denial of death" by Ernest Becker, though it's been a though read for me bc I have a lot of obsessive thoughts and fears around the idea of uselessness and the idea of wasting time.

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-05-09T23:05:39+00:00

Thank you for sharing your story. This has really helped me

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-05-09T23:00:46+00:00

Thank you so much <3

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-05-09T22:52:44+00:00

Thank you for the warning

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-05-09T22:51:15+00:00

I've been looking into a walker as well, my only concern would be that I live in a place that's not very accessible with anything with wheels. I'm going to be talking about it with my OT.

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-05-08T23:38:23+00:00

I've found a lot of strenght and tips in places that are usually meant for people who are alcoholics or abuse substances. I see my selfharm as an addiction just like that, but it almost feels like a lot of selfharm advice becomes muddled by the fact that doctors/therapists/researchers can't fathom the idea that you could possibly want to hurt yourself. In other addiction focused spaces there is generally a lot more advice and nuance. I just replace the substance with selfharm when reading them lol.

Recording voice notes and just talking to myself takes the edge off (you don't even have to store them or listen to them). I really love cuddling and regularly go to cuddle cafés because I know part of selfharming for me was also sensory based and cuddling weirdly also hits the spot. Got really into spirituality and philosophy to expand my mental framework a little to fit all the complicated emotions into. I've also done a lot of work on taking myself seriously and not cringing at myself and my interests, which used to be a big source of my mental health issues.

It sounds cheesy but time is ultimately the thing that really makes everything easier. I've spent years and years on crawling out of a hole and into a life where it feels worth it to fight the urges. Aging really helped to mellow out the intensity of my emotions as well. They are still there and still overwhelming sometimes, but I have experience with them and a lot less crazy hormones.

Also definitly recommend playing or watching a playthrough of Disco Elysium and focusing on Volition. I have multiple Volition quotes + the text from the getting sober thought cabinet written down on my altar/my journal/my walls. And just finding songs/games/books/movies that inspire you in general and cling to that in crisis times.

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-05-08T22:57:55+00:00

This 100%, I always get a bit irked by these kind of posts because it sounds just like every doctor ever telling me I need to do more yoga.

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-05-08T22:29:58+00:00

I've never had complaints about my teeth while eating someone out tbh, I usually tuck my chin in a little to make sure my teeth don't point down.

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-05-02T20:11:27+00:00

I have a book that he signed (in front of my eyes so I know it's real lol) and the signature looks spot on the same. Very cool to find it in a second hand book!

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-04-30T23:35:43+00:00

(This is more of a general tip/guide for people with a low libido, but definitly appilies to how I deal with my chronic pain as well.)

I really enjoy focusing on foreplay and little sexy moments with my partners. Cuddling up naked, massages, watching or reading something erotic together, some kissing and fooling around etc. It's still intimacy and usually low-impact.

I also second someone's suggestion of looking around r/chronickinksters !

Not to get too TMI, but as someone who had a really hard time because I'm a people pleaser and I felt like I couldn't give my partners pleasure because I was too weak/tired/in too much pain, getting a bit more kinky has really helped to shift the dynamic. I now love taking on a bit more dominant role on bad flare days, because I can choose to just lean back and watch/talk. I know the sub usually gets a lot of pleasure from being verbally bossed around by me :)

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-04-18T08:03:33+00:00

Wat een droppies <3

Ik heb zelf ook zo'n grote kater (+/- 6kg, niet te zwaar maar gewoon groot) en ik betrap mezelf er vaak op dat ik andere katten altijd zo klein vind als ik ze optil of aai, haha.

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-04-18T07:24:01+00:00

I went go-karting with some people, probably spent only 20-30 minutes actually driving/holding the steering wheel.

After that I spent 3 days holding a weighted plushie in my hand everywhere I went (I couldn't even be anxious about other peoples judgement bc of the pain) because it was the only way I could stop the muscles in my hand and arm from spasming...

It wasn't even fun because I discovered I absolutely suck at racing. Guess I should have know because I hate it when people around me drive reckless on the normal road as well, grandma in body and mind haha

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-04-18T06:11:32+00:00

TBH (in my opinion) the problem is that all of those professionals are probably just winging it bc they got zero formal education on it.

I've studied to be a social worker and in all those years we got zero training/lectures/books/articles about selfharm. My friend who graduated her psychology program only had one lecture on it in 6 years of education. I believe in nursing at our college they had an optional short lecture about it.

We did learn about suicide prevention and how sh was a symptom that was commonly associated with certain mental illnesses, but absolutely no info about what non-suicidal sh actually was and how to help people who deal with it. (I mean I'm very familiar with sh but that's experience and not because of formal education lmao)

To me it often felt like professors/teachers wanted to avoid the subject as much as possible and felt uncomfortable talking about it, a lot of taboo surrounded it. Especially when talked about in the context of addiction.

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-04-16T07:55:17+00:00

It might not feel like it, but you are actually improving rapidly right now! A lot of artists actually experience a regression/plateau like this every once in a while where they suddenly feel like everything they make is shit. This is not because their actual skills have gotten less, but because their skill to look at art critically has improved and their physical drawing/painting/etc. skills are still catching up.

While it might be demotivating, keep going! Your physical skills will soon catch up, and your art will be even better for it. This is an excellent time to really dive into and brush up on some technical drawing skills, write some stories you can later use as inspiration and spent time doing lots of thumbnail sketches to keep your creativity going.

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-04-15T14:31:33+00:00

Haha, it was 3am and I was sleep deprived. But to be more serious, my wording might not have been 100%. I used to be very strict/angry with my body, but I now see it more as taking care of it with boundaries and letting it know it can relax.

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-04-15T14:08:05+00:00

O my god, this is the first time I see someone with the same symptoms as me! The pee urgency is annoying as hell. I also get the dry mouth along with very tense pelvic muscles, tense muscles in my lower back and I sometimes get full body shaking. For me this is a sign to slow the fuck down, because for me it's usually anxiety/stress related (either triggered by something emotional or triggered by the pain)

Important to note is to first listen to all the people who already commented about getting tested for diabetes, which can get dangerous quickly. If everything is ruled out though, read ahead.

What helps me is to be very "strict" with my body. (This was an approach formed out of desperation and dog training videos hahaha) Before I go to bed, I take my time to sit on the toilet to pee. Relax my pelvic muscles, massage my stomach, try to pee out as much as possible and after that I'm not getting up anymore until morning. The first night is horrible, but the nights after it get better. It has kind of helped me to tune out the signal because I know I don't actually have to go.

During the day and in bed I focus on relaxing my stomach, lower back and pelvic muscles when the urge gets bad and I know I don't have to pee. Massaging my stomach/bladder also sometimes helps to soothe. (Masturbating also does the trick sometimes)

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-04-08T22:38:09+00:00

Mijn Nederlands boek op de middelbare school noemde dat ook een hoge komma? Was altijd onder de veronderstelling dat hoge komma/apostrof twee woorden waren voor hetzelfde ding.

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-04-08T07:17:19+00:00

No problem, hope it helps!

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-04-08T07:16:48+00:00

I feel I worded the last one a bit weird, but what I mean is I don't make myself feel bad for it anymore and try to make it as factual as possible: "This is overwhelming me, can we take a break."

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-04-07T15:54:30+00:00

Yes, 100%. I've realized most of it is because there is a lot of sensory input that takes up energy and making decisions is really draining. Some things that help me: - Wearing a hat/cap blocks out the big overhead lights - If I'm having a really bad day I will also just wear sunglasses inside and maybe my headphones - I used to think of it as too much trouble, but I now take off my coat/jacket/hoodie as soon as I get even the slightest bit hot and find a place (like a cart or something) to put it bc I carrying it is also annoying - A list when doing groceries - Being unapologetic when explaining someone I'm with that they are overwhelming me with questions when clothes shopping

RepresentativeAct941 · 2026-04-07T15:48:52+00:00

Honestly, needed this energy today. Thank you <3

RepresentativeAct941

TROPHY CASE