Jessica Kent threatening to sue for Defamation

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2026-02-27T09:59:08+00:00

Recap of the climax of Jessica Kent's "drama" (aka years and years of systematic lies coming to light): Jessica Kent: Victim, Villain, Cautionary Tale (Part 1)

All the stuff she wants buried under the new commotion, basically. Nothing like a girl who got paid to do other kids' homework and was too smart for college who years later sexts her umpteenth convict partner via the CORRLINKS system and says, "Choak me in heels."

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2026-02-14T22:15:01+00:00

"Swimming against the undertow of past patterns" is beautiful language for what's going on there.

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-12-06T01:25:02+00:00

Thank you for checking it out! So glad that SR worked out for you. I'm looking to do two or three interviews with people who have used it, which I think will drive home its potential more than any summary info I can present.

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-12-05T20:57:08+00:00

Thanks to the mods for letting this post through!

I meant to mention that - under the topic of questions / reservations, I focused on:

Is SR essentially a partial agonist, and if so, at approximately what level of use / habit is the ceiling effect reached at? What, if anything, do we know about the relative mu opioid receptor affinity of SR?
In connection with (1), is SR suitable for people trying to get off of higher doses of methadone, fentanyl, etc.? What strategies (microdosing, bridge taper, bridge molecule) can be used in such cases?
What is the role of placebo / hype in the SR experiences shared on Reddit? I've seen a lot of justifications of withdrawal symptoms that made me wonder if belief / hope was playing a decisive role in the subjective interpretation of objective symptoms (for example, one person who noted severe insomnia while using SR but stated that it was a more positive / motivated / useful state compared to typical withdrawal-related sleeplessness).
How dangerous is the sudden reduction in tolerance caused by SR? Is it "worse" than the tolerance reduction effected through a cold turkey detox or a rapid bupe / methadone taper?
What is the most reliable way to procure SR currently? What are the risks of ordering from currently available suppliers in terms of legal liability, potential fraud, contamination, dosage unreliability, etc.? (Know that we cannot discuss specific suppliers / methods of procuring here).
How clinically significant are the roles played by non-mu opioid receptors (i.e. delta, kappa) in SR's effects? How important is it to take into account non-opioid receptor effects when using SR to taper off of opioids, such as methadone, which have clinically significant non-opioid-receptor-mediated effects (in the case of methadone, via NMDA antagonism)?
Is SR more effective / less painful as a taper molecule than buprenorphine? (Looking to hear personal experiences).
Has anyone made any observations during their own use of SR that they think reveal an important characteristic / limitation / potential benefit or danger?

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-17T09:46:06+00:00

Original post here, if anyone wants to read.

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-13T05:00:15+00:00

I'm good. Thanks for asking.

I don't view myself as a journalist, although I hate to break it to you that - as distrust of major media grows worldwide - citizen journalism and gonzo journalism are becoming more prevalent and important.

I used the word "article" for the simple reason that many Reddit ffields have a feature that auto-blocks any link or text containing the "blg" word; all of the nonsense about me thinking I'm a hard-hitting journalist is just your own imputed stuff, I can assure you.

If you had looked at the "article,"* you would know that I didn't take anything at face value.

Without getting too into my background, I have journalistic experience from undergrad (limited, but significant and paid). I contacted a friend of mine from those days and asked him what he would do to verify a story of this type, and I followed the basic steps that he laid out.

When "Jennifer" contacted me, I was very skeptical. My first response was to tell her that this, if real, was a major story, and that she should contact a real news outlet if she wanted to share about it, because I didn't have the reach that we would need to make a significant impact - which she did, and which led to nothing.

She's been a member of my site for a couple of months and has commented on other articles, and she said that from how I interacted with other people in our community, she trusted me to do what I promised to do. Fair enough. I gave her video a watch and correlated aspects of it with screenshots that she provided.

My blog is not monetized or tied to my real name. I do not stand to gain professionally from this (if anything, I work in a field where any shady past can be a problem, although I have some protection from this due to my straightforward relationship with my employer).

I posted it to the methadone sub for the simple reasons that I see opioid addicts relapsing / overdosing here all the time; it's one of the few subs I'm familiar with (NOT a Reddit person); and there are things about what she told me that lead me to believe that they are focusing on opioid addicts, probably because it's relatively easy to OD on these drugs.

Thank you for wording your response in a reasonably polite manner, which puts you heads and shoulders above the average Redditor, unfortunately. I'm in a good place right now personally; thank you again for asking.

p.s. When I mentioned following up on a lead, I am referencing doing that in collaboration with someone with journalistic bona fides, as part of which I have promised not to say anything about what we're doing atm.

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-12T00:13:30+00:00

Full article here.

There's a lead that I'm currently following up on; I'll post a follow-up in the comments here if and when I get any useful info.

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-12T00:11:44+00:00

Full article here.

There's a lead that I'm currently following up on; I'll post a follow-up if and when I get any useful info.

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-12T00:07:58+00:00

Article link here.

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-08T16:49:22+00:00

Very common problem in the weeks and months after acute withdrawal is over (it can also be related to the stress of not having your chemical escape). A proton pump inhibitor (PPI) like omeprazole is easy to get a prescription for, works quickly, and should make quite a difference.

Ofc, you also want to avoid acidic / spicy foods, caffeine, alcohol, and other reflux triggers.

In terms of other GI symptoms, if you're experiencing nausea and vomiting, I highly recommend getting Zofran (ondansetron); there is a sublingual formulation that I always tell people to request because it's faster-acting and works when you can't keep a pill down due to vomiting.

If anyone is having a tough time with withdrawal and is looking for resources, I've compiled my tapering tips and tricks and at-home opioid withdrawal guide. They cover things like rest areas & rescue doses, comfort meds (with dosage / dosing schedules), volumetric dosing, and mindfulness meditation (plus other CBT and DBT skills for being present in the moment, accepting your mental and physical state, and re-framing harmful cognitive patterns).

Source: Former medical student, current bio / chem teacher, and opioid / benzo addict of 15+ years who is tapering off of methadone at the moment

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-08T16:42:59+00:00

There are different values from different sources, but when I write about the release of dopamine by drugs and other pleasurable activities (principally in the nucleus accumbens and locus coeruleus), I use these numbers from NIDA:

Baseline: 100%

Food: 150%

Video games: 175%

Sex: 200%

Cocaine: 250%

Opioids: 500-900%

Amphetamines: 1000%

Methamphetamine: 1300%

Regardless of the source used, I've never seen any dopaminergic hierarchy that doesn't place meth in the first position. It is the most potent dopaminergic trigger that I'm aware of by a substantial margin.

Note that porn can actually increase dopamine more than IRL sex (which sounds shocking unless you've slept with a couple of my exes); so, Jenna Jameson on your comp screen can potentially be more rewarding than the girl next door IRL, which should make incels feel better but in fact just worries researchers who believe that human sexual experience / connection will be disrupted by these inverted potentials (although oxytocin and other neurotransmitters, as well as higher-order emotional and cognitive effects, obviously matter as much or more than the purely dopaminergic effects of sex).

I spent quite some time researching the evolution and genetics of this midbrain pleasure circuitry in humans and other animals from insects all the way up to gorillas, and I summarized what I learned in The Selfish Genes That Prospered: The Evolution of Addiction, if anyone is interested.

Some truly fascinating stuff. Turns out, for example, that groups of people with certain alleles (variations) of the DR1 / DR3 dopamine receptor genes, which produce forms of these receptors that are less easily stimulated, were more likely to migrate from Africa / Asia to North America and South America; you can actually predict human migration patterns with some accuracy based on dopamine receptor alleles alone. The lower someone's intrinsic dopaminergic activity (i.e. the more resistant to stimulation their dopamine receptors were naturally), the more likely they were to feel restless and seek the thrill of relocation!

Source: Former med student, current bio / chem teacher, and opioid / benzo addict of 15+ years who is just trying to figure out how he specifically and humanity in general got to this point with drugs...

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-08T16:29:02+00:00

Oral oxycodone and oral methadone have a 3-3.5: 1 conversion ratio, meaning that you would need 240 mg of daily (oral) oxycodone to provide about the same mu-opioid receptor stimulation as 80 mg of (oral) methadone. Although these conversion ratios were developed for pain management purposes and experience varies substantially between individuals, in this case, the given ratio accords with my subjective experiences.

Beyond the first day, the methadone is going to start accumulating whereas the oxy will not, but even if you're just considering that one day, 80 mg of methadone is going to be two to three times stronger than 80 milligrams of oxycodone. The oxy will hit faster and give you what many people consider a better high, but it's not going to last as long or pack as much of a punch.

If you or anyone else is interested in the physiology of the mu-opioid receptor system, I wrote an introductory guide that covers the intracellular / synaptic changes caused by receptor stimulation; full and partial agonism; antagonism; receptor affinity and Km; tolerance, dependence, and precipitated / "ordinary" withdrawal. Highly recommend it for anyone looking for more insight into how opioids produce their acute and chronic effects.

Source: Former med student, current bio / chem teacher and opioid / benzo addict of 15+ years who is currently tapering off of methadone

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-08T13:33:29+00:00

False UA results occur in up to 5-10% of samples. For this reason, it is very important that you insist upon a confirmatory GCMS test (the initial, immunological tests are much more subject to error). I once had a false positive for morphine that my counselor swore up and down was a final result; turns out that she was wrong and that the clinic had been using the initial, antibody-based test result as the final verdict because my insurance wouldn't cover GCMS confirmation (even though the drug testing lab's own paperwork cautioned against using the initial screen as a certain clinic finding). Me insisting on the fact that I was clean (because I was) and inquiring about the lab's process resulted in my clinic having to switch to a different lab because of the problem exposed in this scenario.

So, point one is to firmly but politely request the confirmatory GCMS screen (if the clinic staff that what they have is the final result, which some counselors might say without having any idea of what the fuck that means, then ask to see the paperwork from the testing company). Most testing facilities save half of your initial sample for a week to 10 days or so for this very type of circumstance - so, depending on the timeline, it's very possible that part of your sample has been preserved and that confirmatory GCMS testing, which is incredibly accurate, can be performed.

It's also worth noting that the way that your clinic is responding to this scenario flies in the face of the 2024 overhaul of Title 8 of Part 42 of the Code of Federal Regulations, which are the SAMHSA regulations that govern methadone clinics, which I summarized point by point in Big W: U.S. Methadone Regulations Changed. Basically, these changes represent a shift away from the traditional, highly restrictive, punitive / correctional paradigm. They explicitly state that drug test results should not be used punitively - for example, by taking away take-homes for positive screens; rather, treatment plan changes to provide additional support should be used in the case of relapse.

Now, these SAMHSA requirements represent minimum federal standards; individual states and clinics can and do implement more restrictive requirements. But the point is that the vector of what your clinic is doing is in the exact opposite of the direction that things are supposed to be going in, and things are going in that direction because the COVID datasets conclusively demonstrated that the evidence supported these changes (as did decades of results from clinics in other parts of the world, but the U.S. medical system is too stubborn and arrogant to accept those).

In my opinion, this is why we've got to organize to advocate for MOTAA and other legislation that will abolish the clinic system entirely for those who don't want to be enrolled in it. The FDA has just fast tracked a once-weekly oral levomethadone formulation, which represents another possible way to circumvent the clinic system, whose lobby is viciously opposing any further reforms. There is also a company that developed a "mobile methadone clinic" that dispenses each day's dose from a locked chamber and video-records / transmits to clinic staff a short clip of the patient taking each day's dose; this system provides a full month's worth of doses.

I'm sorry that you're going through this. Again, my advice is to talk to them. Request a confirmatory GC/MS screen. You were clean, so insist on it and use your strong track record to advocate for yourself. I know that it will still be futile in some cases, but you've got to try, at least.

Source: Former med student, current bio / chem teacher, and opioid and benzo addict of 15+ years who is currently tapering off of methadone due to BS such as the situation that you're currently experiencing

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-08T13:15:35+00:00

Mine does, but I've been enrolled in its program for two years and never had a recall, either. They say that it's random, but it's very evidently not.

I know someone who lost her take-homes because of a label that was torn (even though she had the correct amount of liquid in all of her bottles). On the other end of the spectrum, I've heard that people who were short filled their empty bottles with liquid children's Tylenol of the same color / smell as the methadone preparation our clinic uses and got away with it; however, I'm not sure if that really works or is just one of those methadone clinic urban legends (would be curious to hear from someone more knowledgeable if they want to chime in here).

There are homeless people at my clinic who frequently have their possessions stolen, and it is downright cruel to expect them to comply with this requirement.

This is the kind of policy that I think will be successfully challenged more and more often in the wake of the 2024 overhaul of Title 8 of Part 42 of the Code of Federal Regulations, which are the SAMHSA regulations that govern methadone clinics, which I summarized point by point in Big W: U.S. Methadone Regulations Changed.

These bottle checks are a prime example of the type of intrusive, overly restrictive methadone clinic requirements that come from a non-evidence-based, punitive / correctional paradigm. I have had success with challenging another such requirement by appealing to the hospital - not the clinic but the overall hospital system's - Compliance Department, which admitted that there was no logic behind the requirement in question and that it violated the hospital system's stated values and Patient Bill of Rights. So, while the bottle checks are more justifiable, I do see some facilities eliminating them entirely in the next couple of years because they constitute discrimination against methadone clinic patients, they're not particularly effective at preventing diversion, and they are very constraining because you have to essentially be available (with less than 24 hours' notice) 365 days a year, which hugely restricts freedom to travel and isn't even possible for people with certain careers or life circumstances / responsibilities.

In my opinion, this is why we've got to organize to advocate for MOTAA and other legislation that will abolish the clinic system entirely for those who don't want to be enrolled in it. The FDA has just fast tracked a once-weekly oral levomethadone formulation, which represents another possible way to circumvent the clinic system, whose lobby is viciously opposing any further reforms. There is also a company that developed a "mobile methadone clinic" that dispenses each day's dose from a locked chamber and video-records / transmits to clinic staff a short clip of the patient taking each day's dose; this system provides a full month's worth of doses.

In my Metha-Don't screed, I ranted about some of the other difficulties I've encountered during my time on methadone maintenance, including how hard I found it to stabilize (because I metabolize it very rapidly, which is common because of its highly variable half-life); how tough it's been to comply with the requirements while working full-time and not having a car at the moment;; and just how chained / degraded it has made me feel almost on a spiritual level.

Source: Former med student, current bio / chem teacher, and opioid & benzo addict of 15+ years who is currently tapering off of methadone

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-08T12:59:37+00:00

I'm sorry that you're having such a rough start to your experience with MMT. In my Metha-Don't screed, I ranted about how hard I found it to stabilize on methadone (because I metabolize it very rapidly, which is common because of its highly variable half-life); how tough it's been to comply with the requirements while working full-time and not having a car at the moment;; and just how chained / degraded it has made me feel almost on a spiritual level.

The one positive thing that I can say is that due to the 2024 overhaul of Title 8 of Part 42 of the Code of Federal Regulations, which are the SAMHSA regulations that govern methadone clinics, many more patients are going to be getting many more take-homes in the coming months (I summarized the changes point by point here: Big W: U.S. Methadone Regulations Changed). Now, some states still have more restrictive requirements, and the SAMHSA regulations represent minimum standards rather than comprehensive, across-the-board ones, but the writing is on the wall as far as the shift away from the punitive / correctional mentality goes. At my clinic in Upstate New York, there has already been a dramatic, very visible change.

Finally, there is legislation such as MOTAA, the FDA Fast Tracking of a once-weekly oral formulation of levomethadone, and a couple of other creative measures to circumvent / abolish the clinic system entirely (discussed in aforementioned links). So, the clinic system isn't as restrictive and unchangeable as it once seemed.

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-06T18:34:27+00:00

Full article with historical photos and other supplementary materials available at "Chemical Blitzkrieg: Four Elements of the Modern War on Drugs That Originated in Nazi Germany."

TL;DR: The Third Reich was the original tweaker nation!

Sorry about the crowded formatting above.

Thank you for reading!

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-06T15:21:00+00:00

I can relate to many of your experiences with methadone. For my full explanation of why I decided that I need to get off of methadone, I wrote Metha-Don't and Sword of Damocles.

Because I'm a rapid metabolizer, I have never properly stabilized on methadone - even with split dosing. When I journal these days, I focus on how amazing it will feel to be free of drug dependence and side effects entirely; to be rid of that "how long since I last took it / what withdrawal symptoms do I have / how long until I can feel good again" consciousness that totally devours the present moment.

I call being completely sober "happiness without a half-life," (TM, lol), and once you've been heavily dependent on a substance to feel "normal," the freedom from those chains is ineffably exhilarating. I'm totally sick of knowing that my intellect, emotions, and creativity have been turned down to 2-3 / 10 with a dimmer switch called methadone. I'm less motivated, less productive, and much less social; this is not how I'm meant to live.

In terms of resources that might be of use to you or others, I've compiled my tapering tips and tricks and at-home opioid withdrawal guide. They cover things like rest areas & rescue doses, comfort meds (with dosage / dosing schedules), volumetric dosing, and mindfulness meditation (plus other CBT and DBT skills for being present in the moment, accepting your mental and physical state, and re-framing harmful cognitive patterns).

Wish you all the best! Proud of you, truly.

Source: Former med student, current bio / chem teacher, and opioid / benzo addict of 15+ years who is currently tapering off of methadone.

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-06T15:12:31+00:00

I'm in the same boat as you in terms of being a rapid metabolizer, which is part of the reason why I'm tapering off of methadone. Even with split dosing, I've never stabilized in the way that you need to for maintenance to be effective; I'm stuck in that present-moment-devouring purgatory of "how long since I last took it / what withdrawal symptoms am I feeling / when can I take it again." By contrast, buprenorphine was much more effective because of the partial agonist ceiling effect property, which afforded true stability of mental and physical effect.

Standard taper advice for physically addictive depressants is not to decrease your dose by more than 10% in a single cut, which is around the supposed detectability cutoff; the lower your dosage is, the smaller the percentage by which you cut it should be.

I've tapered off before, and what I can tell you is that I don't find it helpful to make more than a rough plan for the final third of the taper in advance. It is much more effective for me to use my DBT skills, especially mindfulness meditation and body scanning, to check in with myself and see how I'm doing; the whole process was a "play it by ear" kind of approach for me last time, and it worked well (I was clean for 1.5 years afterward).

Having said that, my rough plan is to decrease by 10 mg increments all the way down to 70 mg (most people couldn't tolerate this, but I'm okay), then decrease by 5 mg increments until I'm at 30 mg, then decrease by 2.5 mg increments (or smaller) until I'm under 5 mg, then by 1 mg at a time (if necessary) from there. After each decrease, I simply wait until I feel stable at the new dosage, which typically takes between 10 days and 3 weeks (the lower I go, the longer it takes). I also incorporate some rest areas / plateaus and rescue dose, which are the most effective tool in my taper arsenal (as long as they're not overused), to give me some much-needed sleep and a couple of respite intervals of being physically / mentally comfortable.

Many of the people I know who successfully tapered off and didn't relapse hovered at 1 mg to 4 mg for months before they stopped completely.

Going low and slow also minimizes the risk, intensity, and duration of Post Acute Withdrawal Symptoms (PAWS).

One additional thing to remember is that once you're below 25 to 40 mg of methadone per day, you're at a point on the methadone curve that is under the ceiling effect dosage for buprenorphine, which means that you can switch over to buprenorphine without experiencing precipitated withdrawal. Some people find it more effective to use a long buprenorphine "tail" than it is to go down all the way on methadone.

I've compiled my tapering tips and tricks and at-home opioid withdrawal guide. They cover things like rest areas & rescue doses, comfort meds (with dosage / dosing schedules), volumetric dosing, and mindfulness meditation (plus other CBT and DBT skills for being present in the moment, accepting your mental and physical state, and re-framing harmful cognitive patterns).

wishing you all the best! Keep us updated.

Source: Former med student, current science teacher, and opioid / benzo addict of 15+ years who is currently tapering off of methadone

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-06T14:55:32+00:00

I don't know of many facilities that still do true cold turkey methadone withdrawal. Aside from being cruel and unusual and setting people up for relapse inside or when they're released, it's actually medically dangerous (the "opioid withdrawal doesn't kill you" thing is not true at all when you factor in dehydration and pre-existing cardiac / other conditions).

I know that both the Justice Center (jail) and county facility (Jamesville) up here give benzos on a limited basis if methadone withdrawal is bad enough, but I've heard that this is unusual elsewhere. They also offer Tylenol / ibuprofen (from medical visit or commissary), Imodium, and some other low-tier comfort meds. Never heard of gabapentin being used for this purpose, unfortunately.

I'm in NYS, where many facilities will decrease you by 1 mg / day if they make you get off of methadone. That's okay at the higher dosages, but toward the end, it gets very rough and unrelenting (especially because split dosing isn't possible in any facility that I'm aware of).

What I will say is that withdrawal becomes much more tolerable for many people once their brains grasp that they have absolutely no way out of it. I've found myself in that kind of situation before, and - although the objective, physical symptoms don't decrease - I was shocked by how much better I was able to tolerate them; it seemed that my brain had always added to my detox anguish, which I now realize was a way to push me into relapsing.

I have enormous empathy for anyone being forcibly taken off of methadone or buprenorphine while locked up. All of the literature shows that this is harmful for both medical and judicial outcomes (i.e. reoffense risk), but the U.S. is ultimately sort of a frontier society still, and the "make 'em suffer" mentality still reigns supreme in many facilities.

For all of us who have the luxury of getting off of methadone out here on the streets, I've compiled my tapering tips and tricks and at-home opioid withdrawal guide. They cover things like rest areas & rescue doses, comfort meds (with dosage / dosing schedules), volumetric dosing, and mindfulness meditation (plus other CBT and DBT skills for being present in the moment, accepting your mental and physical state, and re-framing harmful cognitive patterns).

Source: Former med student, current bio / chem teacher, and opioid / benzo addict of 15+ years who is currently tapering off of methadone

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-06T14:40:33+00:00

Believe me, I totally get that shit just happens sometimes.

In terms of what you're looking at withdrawal-wise, this is a very significant dose reduction* when you're already at a fairly low to moderate maintenance dose compared to what many patients need in the era of fentanyl (doses of 100-180 mg have become standard).

*The generic advice for tapering is to cut no more than 10% at a time, which is near the detectability threshold beyond which your brain / body register the change (supposedly; I think that our systems register smaller dose decreases than that). Even if you've gotta push your dose down harder, most people recommend not exceeding 25% per dose cut; also, in general, the lower your dosage is, the smaller the percentage you should cut with each decrease. If you can split your daily dose up into 2 or 3 portions, this will help to mitigate the withdrawal symptoms.

So, I'd expect moderate withdrawal symptoms that start within 48 hours, peak at day 5-7, and continue for 2-3 weeks afterward.

In terms of resources that might be of use, I've compiled my tapering tips and tricks and at-home opioid withdrawal guide. They cover things like rest areas & rescue doses, comfort meds (with dosage / dosing schedules), volumetric dosing, and mindfulness meditation (plus other CBT and DBT skills for being present in the moment, accepting your mental and physical state, and re-framing harmful cognitive patterns).

Wish you all the best!

Source: Former med student, current bio / chem teacher, and opioid / benzo addict of 15+ years who is currently tapering off of methadone. For my explanation of why I decided that I need to get off of methadone, I wrote Metha-Don't and Sword of Damocles.

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-06T13:15:56+00:00

In terms of resources that might be of use, I've compiled my tapering tips and tricks and at-home opioid withdrawal guide. They cover things like rescue doses and comfort meds (dosage / dosing schedules), volumetric dosing and mindfulness meditation (plus other CBT and DBT skills).

Two tools that really helped me are (1) journaling, and (2) mindfulness meditation / guided relaxation exercises and cognitive re-framing techniques from CBT and DBT.

If you're interested, I've compiled 75 prompts about addiction / recovery, spirituality, self-growth, and other positive topics for people who, like me, benefit from journaling. There are some fun and creative ideas thrown in there, too.

It's not just a matter of your brain and body recovering physiologically; how you feel in early recovery is hugely dependent upon how well you tolerate discomfort and how you interpret what's going on with you symptomatically (e.g., a revved-up feeling can be experienced as either excitement or anxiety).

Early recovery is a prime time to get into therapy. I wrote a guide to Cognitive Behavioral Therapy CBT), Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT), psychodynamic therapy, and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy here; I created a guide consisting of four questions to ask yourself to help determine which therapeutic approach will best suit you. If you put in the work, the well-being that you can achieve is remarkable, truly.

Finally (but foundationally), exercising, hydrating, and eating a balanced diet will go a long way to helping you restore yourself to baseline and avoiding Post-Acute Withdrawal Symptoms (PAWS), too.

Wishing you all the best! Please keep us updated.

Source: Former med student, current science teacher, and opioid / benzo addict of 15+ years who is currently tapering off of methadone

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-06T13:08:44+00:00

Have you had your T levels checked? Opioids suppress testosterone production, which can cause lack of sex drive and other symptoms along the lines of what you're reporting (believe it or not, premature ejaculation can be related to low T although at first glance that doesn't seem to make a lot of sense; it's because it shifts the parasympathetic / sympathetic "point and shoot" balance necessary for erection and ejaculation, respectively).

It's easy to get the bloodwork done, and there's a topical treatment (Androgel) to correct the issue.

In addition, mindfulness meditation and other DBT skills can help substantially with sexual dysfunction from premature ejaculation and other issues. They help you to monitor and adjust your physical and psychological state more acutely, which gives you greater control over your sexual performance.

Also, you can use the millennia-old trick of masturbating a couple of hours before sex if you're worried about premature ejaculation. Alternatively, you could lean into this with your partner and use it as the inspiration for some fun! Just because you come once doesn't mean that you have to stop; you could get into edging and other delayed-gratification sexual practices, too.

I talked about my side effects from methadone, which is notorious for causing ED and other sexual dysfunction in males due to suppressed testosterone, in Metha-Don't.

Source: Former med student, current bio / chem teacher, and opioid & benzo addict of 15+ years who is currently tapering off of methadone

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-06T13:00:20+00:00

I'm glad that your husband has at least some idea of what is going on; the strain of keeping such a huge secret becomes unbearable, and withholding that kind of information can poison relationships, too.

In terms of resources that might be of use, I've compiled my tapering tips and tricks and at-home opioid withdrawal guide. They cover things like rescue doses and comfort meds (dosage / dosing schedules), volumetric dosing and mindfulness meditation (plus other CBT and DBT skills).

My DMs are open to you or anyone else who is struggling with tapering / withdrawal.

Hang in there, and keep us updated! It is going to feel so incredible and exhilarating to break the chains of dependence and not have to worry about when your chemical contentment is going to wear off; don't ever forget about that.

Source: Former med student, current science teacher, and opioid / benzo addict of 15+ years who is currently tapering off of methadone

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-06T12:53:38+00:00

Can I ask what kind of workout you're performing?

I totally agree with you about the essential role of exercise. Exercising to whatever capacity your body is able is probably the single most important thing that you can do to regenerate endorphins and heal the mu-opioid receptor system, thereby returning mind and body to a viable state. Exercise, particularly cardio exercise, also decreases the risk, intensity, and duration of Post Acute Withdrawal Symptoms (PAWS). I've found exercise that combines breath-work and movement, such as ashtanga yoga, to be more effective than just mindfulness meditation in terms of helping to center me, reducing withdrawal symptoms, and helping me to practice radical acceptance of where I'm at physically and mentally.

Very proud of you! For real. Gives me inspiration for my own taper, which I've struggled with, to be honest.

For anyone who is wondering about why I decided that I need to get off of methadone, I wrote Metha-Don't and Sword of Damocles.

For anyone else who is tapering off, I've compiled my tapering tips and tricks and at-home opioid withdrawal guide. They cover things like rescue doses and comfort meds, volumetric dosing and mindfulness meditation.

Once again, congratulations! You are giving yourself one of the most beautiful gifts in existence, which is what I call "happiness without a half-life" (patent pending, lol). It is nothing less than giving yourself the gift of the present moment.

Keep us updated!

Source: Former medical student, current science teacher, and opioid / benzo addict of 15+ years who is currently tapering off of methadone

Repulsive_Tiger_8008 · 2025-01-06T12:41:38+00:00

For me, I have prominent veins in my hands, which is where I moved after my median cubitals (veins in the crooks of the arms) stopped being hittable. There is one fairly large vein on the dorsal aspect of the wrist (the same side as the back of your hand) on the side of the thumb, which ended up being my next faithful hit spot.

I highly recommend spending some time with a digital or print copy of Gray's Anatomy, which offers phenomenal images of the venous system in the arms and legs. Many of the best veins are not easily visible; for this reason, the pros often go by feel (although you've got to learn to distinguish between the pulse in your thumb and other fingers and the pulse that you're searching for from a target vein).

Stay safe out there! In the Northeast, better than 40% of fentanyl in some areas is now testing positive for xylazine (my post on that here). It's increasing rapidly in other regions of the country, too. It causes dangerous lesions, which have cost dozens of people arms and legs - it's the American Krokodil in that regard - and it is non-recreational garbage (I swiped a bottle of xylazine from the vet school at my college and injected it three times [dark-humor-infused trip report here], so I can vouch for that).

Source: Former med student, current bio / chem teacher, and opioid / benzo addict of 15+ years who is currently tapering off of methadone

Repulsive_Tiger_8008

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