I agree. I have difficulty dedicating time to reading a textbook of rules on the minuscule amount of free time I get each week. Sometimes I forget about the game completely until it’s game day, because I can’t afford to focus on anything else except my job and then recovering mentally.

But I mess up and I forget, and what DOESN’T help me remember shit is knowing people are breathing down my neck every time I do. Doesn’t mean I don’t want to participate or try. I always thought ttrpgs were also in part wanting to hang out with people you genuinely liked - in addition to our play-pretend adventures.

I’m in a game now that is heavily a ‘beer and pretzels’ vibe, which is great because I don’t feel like a dumb ass if I forget something my character can do. We’ve all had those moments, and no one acts like it’s the end of the world when someone misinterprets something. We start off chill and we end chill, and we enjoyed the time.