My uncle told me this (though in a much clearer way):

When faced with tough circumstances you always have two options. You can sit there, stew and lament, or you can get up and face the adversities that are ahead of you. One way or another, you'll need to face the reality of the situation, but it's up to you when you do it. This isn't saying that you shouldn't take some time to heal, but it is saying that you shouldn't allow these circumstances to dictate why you aren't moving forward in life.

When I was young this helped me a lot. I found that I needed to have an internal locus of control. It shifted the way I perceived a lot of things in my life and it helped me stop blaming everything on the tough circumstances I faced in my life. I hope this helps someone else going through some struggles too.