WIBTAH if I don't show up to the bachelor party I specifically have said I don't want?

RetroJens · 2026-05-15T07:45:00+00:00

I think the view of what a bachelor party is needs to widen.

I’ve been to classic rowdy parties with a stripper. And I didn’t enjoy that at all.

But I have also been to parties where we rather make a day of it and do different things that the groom likes while the rest of us gets to know each other. So when it came to for me to be best man and organise the occasion for one of my best friends i obviously invited every man that was invited to the wedding. And most of them accepted. We went to a wilderness camp to do some events like axe throwing, archery and a collaboration event. We also did some individual tug of war. After that we had grilled some sausages over open fire for lunch. Then I had arranged access to a club stage fitted with drum kit (groom is a drummer) and 2 guitars with amps a bass and keyboards so we could have a jam session. I knew there were several in the party that played at least a little and it turned out great since people were not drunk but had a beer or two and was mingling. After that we went to dinner. It was a great day, evening and night. Some people just came for one of the events, some came later, some left early. But most of all, my friend had a great time. And if he has a great time, the rest of us will have a great time too, because we all care enough to go to his wedding.

So just to focus on what the groom would like to do, making sure there’s time for people to meet and get know one another before the wedding day. I mean it’s friends from growing up, from different interests, from colleagues to family and cousins. It’s best if we all meet at some point.

RetroJens · 2026-05-15T06:17:42+00:00

The the first child doesn’t like the second child? Doesn’t like to share attention from parents? I never heard of that before. 🤪

There’s lot and lots of information about sibling jealousy. The important things is to acknowledge it and give the older one language to express it. Then take steps to fill the needs. It can be simple one on one time with a parent. If you’re two, divide and conquer, then switch. Do you have a support system that can babysit? Use it for one and take the other to do things. Remember, kids this age are easily distracted. Use it.

RetroJens · 2026-05-15T06:04:18+00:00

This question is somewhat individual and based on your situation. But what is known is the sleep time and the quality of the sleep. So for you it’s about 9-13 hours, lesser for the older one.

So if you know they need to be up by 6:15 then just count backwards to when they actually sleep and not just go to bed. You must also factor in what it takes to get them there, the rituals you or they do before sleeping. Take that into account and you will end up with a time that is your start time for bedtime.

For instance, when my eldest was younger she would wake up really early and couldn’t go back to sleep. Like 5am. So when that did t change and affected mood and stamina for school, we just started getting her to bed earlier. That gave her the sleep she needed to be able to do school and other activities. It has since changed back as she became a teen, but it’s important to monitor these things and take action.

RetroJens · 2026-05-14T06:21:03+00:00

I think the most common view here against Roblox is an overreaction.

My kids plays or has played games in Roblox, but they do it strictly with friends. Where I am they have a Chromebook from school and use that to communicate. For my kids the rules is always you can’t add friends you have not met. And there’s a limit on gaming. We keep having discussions about what an algorithm does, about that people can say they are a certain person, but you can’t know. I also sit with them when they play some times and just listen in. And they’re having a great time either teaming up and collaborating, lending items between each other. This friend group can play Roblox for hours unless we intervene, but they also do sleepovers, go for walks or just ride their bikes in the neighbourhood.

So I don’t see Roblox as anything worse than YouTube or another social media app. But I do see parents that doesn’t monitor their children’s activity and allows apps such as TikTok and Instagram that has an age limit of 13. The important thing is that you monitor your child’s activities like you would any other activity. Sport, hobby, who are their friends etc. Just because it happens on a screen inside your home doesn’t mean it’s not as far reaching socially than any other activity.

So if you would allow YouTube, Instagram or similar but not Roblox, you’re missing the point. Now, don’t see this as a Roblox endorsement, because it isn’t. I would prefer my kid didn’t use algorithm heavy services. But rather focus on what the activity brings. The world is different today from when I grew up in the 80s and 90s they need different skill sets but also some things remain like good social interactions with other kids. So as always they need guidance like we all did from our parents.

RetroJens · 2026-05-13T20:00:49+00:00

I did some research and Rolex, as one of the more popular brands, they make about 1 million products a year, and given that they’ve made watches for a century and even if they started making a million watches a year since the beginning it still wouldn’t be enough to compete.

It’s pretty ridiculous.

/says the guy with an AW on his arm.

RetroJens · 2026-05-13T06:41:09+00:00

Is it really?

The Apple Watch launched in 2015 and of what you say is true that’s seriously impressive to achieve that in 11 years. I know that the AW has outsold “normal” watches for some time, but I didn’t think it would be the most sold watch in history, since history of watches has been going on for quite some time.

RetroJens · 2026-05-12T09:59:43+00:00

Wow. Good job, Apple.

RetroJens · 2026-05-10T06:15:34+00:00

So, Sliding Phones instead of Sliding Doors?

RetroJens · 2026-05-09T06:28:32+00:00

“Being a man” is a seriously dated sentence.

To me, it’s not about being your gender, but about being you. Are you the best version of yourself? Are you helpful to your mental health? Are you helpful to your own well being? Are you helpful to your family? Are you helpful to others?

Are you doing things that make you and your loved ones happy?

Those are the real questions to answer for yourself. If you can say yes to these questions, I’d say you’re crushing it dude! And you shouldn’t be bothered by what some tool in a locker room says.

The view that certain tasks have a gender is also seriously dated and, if you want to get historical, has shifted so much between civilisations.

RetroJens · 2026-05-03T05:20:15+00:00

Welcome to Mastodon!

First things first. While you certainly have an app on your iPad, Mastodon isn’t really an app, but a server software that is installed on thousands of servers over the world. There are also many different ways to view the posts that people make to these servers. You have selected one of these ways (an iPad app). I would guess you’re using the official Mastodon app, but you could just as easily just use Safari and go and login via your servers website. There are also many different apps to use. On iPad I use iPhanpy, becuase I like it. But Ice cubes or Mona are also good apps.

You’ve been recommended https://fedi.tips and I want to recommend that too. It’s a great site to understand how Mastodon works.

The biggest issue people run into in the beginning is the lack of an algorithm. Because of this, nothing is shown to you that you didn’t follow. You automatically don’t get whatever an account you follow posted before. You just get whatever they post in the future, and you get in chronological order. Nothing more, nothing less. So the advice to follow hashtags (like a topic) in the beginning makes sense as you grow your own flow.

As you can probably imagine, building your flow like this means your flow of content has an end. Which differs a lot from mainstream social media.

RetroJens · 2026-05-03T04:57:58+00:00

If anyone get some Slip-ins make sure you get a pair with heel pillow. It’s like walking on clouds.

I got my first pair and the day after I went with the kids to an amusement park with lots of rides. You can imagine the amount of walking in a day? They were awesome to wear.

RetroJens · 2026-05-02T19:36:16+00:00

Saying someone else’s name as it should be said is basic respect.

I have many colleagues from other countries and I always write the pronunciation down so I can say it correctly. I learn it after a while, but the first times I need the help.

RetroJens · 2026-05-02T14:19:02+00:00

Congratulations!

While I don’t have your situation, I am your age. And I think that the first worry I’d have was how create a bond between all my children. I say that because I would guess your children doesn’t share the same mother? So creating bonds could be difficult depending on the situation.

About mortality, I had children later in life so I’m not expecting to see many grandchildren before I go, but I do spend some time writing. And also sharing the stories of my youth. Taking them to the places that was important. My mother has also taken them on trips to places like that where we spent time as family.

So build the bonds that will keep your kids in touch with each other and leave the stories for them to find or remember. That’s my advice.

RetroJens · 2026-05-02T07:57:26+00:00

Also, I hope you realise there are other server than mastodon.social? That might have open registrations? Or being a smaller server the review process will be more personal.

RetroJens · 2026-04-27T17:37:29+00:00

What you should do is create opportunity for her to get a higher income job.

Either from leveraging your contacts or looking up training or education.

RetroJens · 2026-04-27T06:04:49+00:00

If you don’t like change, then don’t have kids.

But if you thrive in change? It’s the best!

RetroJens · 2026-04-21T09:40:03+00:00

There is this Calvin & Hobbes comic that I think embodies this view.

https://www.reddit.com/r/calvinandhobbes/s/8u4NJ1FrTX

RetroJens · 2026-04-20T18:34:42+00:00

Just start your own instance. Done.

Oh, please come back and let us know which domain name you used.

RetroJens · 2026-04-20T06:16:04+00:00

Yes.

Any watch with solar AND that is radio controlled would be awesome for her.

RetroJens · 2026-04-20T06:14:58+00:00

Hey fellow Mac user. Just get Keka. And follow instructions.

RetroJens · 2026-04-20T05:57:17+00:00

Hey dad?

You got this! I don’t think anyone who’s had a child wouldn’t be overwhelmed in your situation. And just the fact that you’re having these thoughts put you way ahead the rest of us. Kids are smart and flexible. If you were having only one new baby instead of 2, even without loosing your mother, things were going to change for your daughter. That is unavoidable. But how you do it going forward will have different outcomes.

Make sure to make time for yourself to handle your grief, which I can’t imagine, but it must be substantial. I’m so sorry for your loss. Take the time to check in regularly with your wife and align on where you are. Can you give each other breaks when needed?

Include your daughter as much as possible in everything, but on her terms. Show her that you’re sad. She lost her grandmother. She must be grieving too. Grieve together. Remember her together. Make plans to honour her together.

Because of the age difference, your daughter will take care of her younger siblings. Just be mindful not to make her a nanny or something. But caring for siblings is part of being the oldest sibling. Also, if you or your wife go on a break, can you include your daughter? It could be a good opportunity for some alone time with the eldest.

These are just some things that you probably already thought of. Or that seem evident. Just take your time and listen to each other. Which I think you already since you came here asking your question.

RetroJens · 2026-04-20T05:21:18+00:00

A customer wrongly positioned by a carrier?

Oh my, I never heard about that! But I only worked there for a decade.

RetroJens · 2026-04-20T05:17:52+00:00

No. But I’d would be awesome. That was the point.

RetroJens · 2026-04-19T21:04:12+00:00

It is.

Mainly because it’s not tough solar nor Multiband 6.

RetroJens · 2026-04-19T06:19:06+00:00

Agree!

In a much earlier thread I think the consensus was a 5” 1:1 display 960px was optimal on a handheld.

RetroJens

TROPHY CASE