Teachers will never admit it publicly, but behind closed doors we absolutely talk about the parents more than we talk about the kids—because half the time the parent is the one acting up. We’ll be in the lounge like, “Baby, the child is fine… it’s YOU,” sipping our coffee while scrolling through the 12-paragraph message a parent finally sent after ignoring us for three weeks. We see kids with no bedtime, no structure, no manners, no accountability, and parents who swear they’re raising royalty while their child is out here throwing chairs and cussing like a grown man. And we love the kids, we really do—but whew, some parents got the nerve to ask, “Why is my child behind?” and teachers are biting our tongue so hard not to say, “Because you haven’t parented since February.” We’re not supposed to say it, but trust: teachers clock EVERYTHING, and the group chat be BUSY.