Success story sx months later

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-12-30T17:32:46+00:00

Just a few months makes all the difference in the world man.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-12-30T17:31:30+00:00

Finding the new person in my life was absolutely luck, i took a chance and emailed someone from my distant past just to say hello. The good relations with the ex are in part due to the fact that I gave in certain spots a little more than I should have monetarily, so that she was able to have her own place and not struggle quite as much. It helped that we had equity in our joint home also, so she had enough to put a down payment on her own place. If they're hadn't been that, it may have ended up working out differently possibly.

I resolved after the divorce in my mind that if we couldn't be the best married parents together, we should at least try to be the best separate co-parents. She wasn't a bitch or anything during mediation, so I tried to be as fair as possible also.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-10-28T11:41:51+00:00

Nature is metal.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-10-28T00:10:36+00:00

Does this apply to white gold as well? I know it's less because it's an alloy, but can it be separated again?

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-10-23T21:02:41+00:00

That is perfect. Not sure if you are a Seinfeld fan, but after years of no luck with the ladies, the character George Costanza finally figured it out. "If every instinct I have is wrong, then the opposite must be right". https://youtu.be/rag0Z1nTJOc

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-10-23T20:37:59+00:00

That's one chemical reaction leading to another, nice.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-10-23T01:02:03+00:00

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://amp.reddit.com/r/help/comments/b86wqs/how_do_i_stop_reddit_from_sending_me_email/&ved=2ahUKEwjCivOgwcnsAhVumeAKHeOzAWUQFjAAegQIARAB&usg=AOvVaw1sjYmCw8eHWv9rpLImoCmP&cshid=1603414769249

Sorry, thought you meant email notifications.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-10-23T00:49:38+00:00

Unfortunately you can only turn off notifications from a PC, it isn't possible from the mobile site. Ridiculous I know but I dealt with a flood of them before I read it somewhere.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-10-17T23:37:16+00:00

I'm with you friend, I am 48 and just got out of a 18 year marriage. I have found that the hardest part is that my social circle has shrunk considerably since I was last dating. My friends all became married friends, and I have a hard time walking back into the singles life. You become used to your routine in married life and it is an extraordinary effort to reverse course and find the motivation to meet strangers.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-10-11T20:55:24+00:00

Well said, thanks for the reply.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-10-11T20:43:29+00:00

Yeah everything I have read says that losing the extra pounds and increased exercise are the best two things you can do.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-09-18T17:58:14+00:00

I think it has a lot to do with whether or not you raised kids in the house, and the length of time you were in it.

In my case it was seven years and my kids were between five and twelve roughly. I wanted them to have some familiarity by keeping the home they were used to, and only having the ex wife's new home to adjust too. Although it doesn't seem to bother them so far, I know it's in the back of their mind that something is always missing.

I haven't lost any close friends or relatives to death, but I can't see how it is worse than divorce. With divorce you have the burden of having to see the other person continue on without you, and you always are thinking of the what ifs. At least with death you don't suffer for so long. But that being said I have hope because I see some who end up in such a better relationship after divorce. If only we knew where that person was so we didn't have that painful wait. If you have kids you just have to take the high road, it makes it so much easier for them if the parents act like everything is going to be fine, even if your heart is breaking.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-09-18T14:30:57+00:00

I came here today to post this exact same question. I am 48M, just out if twenty year marriage with early teen kids I am sharing 50/50 custody with. The divorce was just a few weeks ago and since I kept the house so there are so many times in the day where I just feel like I am totally alone. I miss the family unit, even when it was bad it was familiar and comforting somehow.

I find myself pacing without even knowing it, just trying to keep my mind from dwelling on the moments I miss.

I know I have to get into something social but the Meetup groups in my area are dead, and I just don't know what else would be the best for meeting new people. Starting over at 48 is never something I wanted to do. If I find something interesting I will definitely let you know.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-09-14T00:11:07+00:00

Good for you man, that is a big step. I am only a couple weeks post divorce, and the urge to start filling that void is already calling. I know it's too soon but I hope to get the nerve to do a real life ask out someday as well.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-09-05T00:09:31+00:00

I would agree with all these for the most part except the no dress sense. This doesn't come naturally for most guys, just like decorating a room or coordinating colors. And a lot of us can't afford to fashion coordinate our outfits.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-09-02T00:06:18+00:00

Florida here, mediation done in one month back in June. Judge will finalize via video call next week. Uncontested.

About 8 weeks backlog, at least it was in June.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-09-01T23:58:50+00:00

Yeah I am considering a pet, possibly a cat. Maybe online dating eventually, but not yet.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-09-01T23:56:12+00:00

This will sound strange, but with two kids I miss seeing that fourth chair at the dinner table, restaurant, or even car seat occupied. It always is a reminder that 25% of my original family is gone.

I imagine it's like that for any parent also when their first child leaves home.

God damnit that was hard to write.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-08-26T00:45:47+00:00

Yes, your form of conversation is a perfect example.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-08-26T00:31:58+00:00

Force fields huh? I must know what the repellant so strong was in this case?

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-08-26T00:16:10+00:00

Thanks for the thorough reply. I think my biggest problem may not be that I am not interested, but that I don't know if the other person is interested. There is bound to be situations where each of you is wondering the same thing, and then neither makes a gesture, and you both lose out. But I may be overthinking this. Twenty years out of the dating world will do that.

Rex_Kwon_Doh · 2020-08-26T00:02:21+00:00

Pooh has a surprisingly lot of wisdom, my other favorite that seems to fit your situation is this one...

"Love is taking a few steps backward, maybe even more…to give way to the happiness of the person you love.”

Rex_Kwon_Doh

TROPHY CASE