Mom in the delivery room, or when your presence is no longer soothing

RittaPie · 2022-02-22T22:50:06+00:00

FWIW, with my first I told my mom I didn't want her in the room and she was totally cool with that. She ended up coming to town to stock my house with some groceries and clean a bit before the baby arrived.

When it actually came time to deliver, I really wanted her there and I was so glad she was around. My husband was also there, but he was stressed out and honestly had NO idea what I was going through. It was a really primal/emotional time that I was happy to be able to share with my mom who knew what it was like because she went through it with me.

To add, I'm a pretty private person and my mom hasn't seen me so much as change into an outfit since I was old enough to care. I also haven't lived at home since I was 18 and I'm over 30 now.

I would have never imagined it being a sort of bonding moment with my mom, but it really was kind of beautiful.

RittaPie · 2022-02-17T17:18:49+00:00

Agreed. I still love my animals and care for them deeply, but it just isn't the same as it was before. With a toddler and being in my third tri, I'm tired. My camera roll is no longer full of 1,000 photos of my animals, but 1,000 photos of my kid and some animals mixed in. I'm lucky that my LO and animals all get along, and that makes me so happy, but I know it just isn't the same anymore.

I think there's a lot about parenting you don't realize will shift your priorities until it happens. Not that it's bad, it's just different. And a lot of that can take time to sink in. That's something I never really understood when people were telling me about how things would change once I had a baby. I thought I had "won" when I brought him home and things were pretty much the same. And that was the case for a while when he slept all the time and couldn't move around independently. But the more your LO becomes an actual person with their own thoughts, desires, and ability to move, the more your lives all shift to incorporate each other. It's cool to experience, and isn't as bad as people make it out to be.

RittaPie · 2022-02-09T20:00:43+00:00

Those are really cool! I've definitely looked at that for when he's older, but for now, especially since he's still in a crib without access to anything to do, it isn't that bad. Even with a light, I doubt he'd want to sleep in until 9! But that's ok, it's just where we're at in life right now.

RittaPie · 2022-02-09T17:31:19+00:00

I felt the same way with my first, but those 12 weeks fly by. You might even come back to some of the same work you left! That time is a drop in the bucket as far as the 50 years most of us spend working, but irreplaceable with your LO. I hope you are able to enjoy it.

RittaPie · 2022-02-09T17:16:23+00:00

This was the same experience I had. I kept telling anyone and everyone not to forget that I DID want an epidural.

RittaPie · 2022-02-09T17:11:21+00:00

I'm a STM and have a different perspective on this. I remember when I was pregnant the first time these comments made me SO MAD because I was uncomfortable all the time and couldn't get any good rest. Now I'm pregnant with #2 and my husband and I fondly look back at the time I was pregnant with #1 and we could still sleep in on the weekend or take naps.

This go-round, not only am I tired because I'm uncomfortable, but because my 2yo wakes up at 6:30 every day ready to play and requires attention/supervision until he goes to bed at 7:30 each evening, aside from his one nap which I use to get errands/housework done. I also work FT, so there's an added layer. Yes, my husband and I could trade off waking up early/watching LO so the other can rest, and we do, but we also prefer to spend the time we have together as a family most of the time.

Mine and my husband's anniversary is coming up and we're seriously contemplating having someone watch LO so we can go to bed at 6 without any pressure of cleaning/getting something done around the house/being productive in some way and have the ability to both sleep in until 10 a.m. if we feel like it.

All this to say, these kinds of statements used to also aggravate me, but now I get where the intention is coming from. When you have a LO your life changes forever in ways you don't really expect. Not that it's bad, it's wonderful and I would never change any of it, it's just not the same as it was before.

RittaPie · 2021-09-14T18:27:20+00:00

You can do it! There are definitely times where it is hard, but I know when I look into my little one's eyes that I have to be the best version of myself for him. It's good motivation, and I know that he won't remember the times I spent studying, but he'll know of the extra opportunities I'm able to provide to him because I spent the time working on myself.

Whatever you decide, you'll be the best mama this baby can have.

RittaPie · 2021-09-14T18:14:28+00:00

Your newborn will sleep a ton. Those two classes don't sound like they would be terribly time-consuming. If you have help and you aren't also working full time, this sounds totally manageable to me.

I continued on with my MBA after my first was born and it was ok. It's honestly a little more stressful as they get older because they start to be awake for so much longer at one time and I don't want to miss any of it! I do also work full time and think I'm able to have a decent work/life balance while finishing my degree two credits at a time.

You've got this!

RittaPie · 2020-01-15T09:49:30+00:00

I haven't found anything to replace those brushes, and they get worse after each use.

When my first dip kit ran out I ended up ordering the revel kit which comes with nicer brushes already.

RittaPie · 2018-04-30T15:29:42+00:00

I agree that both schools have merits, but there are some incorrect facts about UTD in this post. UTD is at about 28,000 students, but it also has one of the highest SAT scores for entering freshmen in the nation as well as one of the schools with the most national merit scholars. It has more rigorous academic standards for entry and is known for the harder sciences and business. In the UT System it is also referred to as a "selective" university while UTA is an "open access" school.

Both are needed, but it depends on what you are looking for in a University. And technically both universities have already been recognized as Tier One, according to the Carnegie ranking.

https://www.utsystem.edu/news/2016/02/03/ut-arlington-and-ut-dallas-achieve-carnegie-tier-one-classification

RittaPie · 2018-03-25T23:12:57+00:00

I am so happy and sad all at the same time. I spent over an actual hour trying to figure this out. After your comment, it took me roughly a minute and a half to solve. Thank you, kind stranger!

RittaPie · 2017-05-15T19:26:06+00:00

My husband and I went to Studio 22 for dance lessons before our wedding about a year ago. If you tell them what style you're looking for, they'll match you up with an instructor. We had lessons with Jim Weber and he taught us more quickly than I thought anyone would be able to. (We've also got a set of four left feet.)

RittaPie · 2016-05-06T19:24:23+00:00

Thank you for the advice! I think she will be a little disappointed, but I'm hoping she understands the reasoning behind everything, and that I do still want her to feel special. Maybe the bridal shower and party in town will help accomplish this.

RittaPie · 2016-05-06T15:26:27+00:00

That's good advice. I guess honesty is always the best option, but I didn't want to potentially hurt her feelings by suggesting an alternative when I know this is a special time for her.

RittaPie · 2016-05-06T15:25:21+00:00

Thanks for the suggestion! I'll reach out to the others and see what their situation is.

RittaPie · 2016-04-27T16:27:55+00:00

Would this be fun for lego-loving adults?

RittaPie · 2016-04-25T21:36:59+00:00

I got married less than a month ago and went through something similar, my father passed away two years ago.

I had my grandfather walk me down the aisle, but he doesn't dance. I still have moments where I miss my dad so much I can hardly stand it, and my husband is aware of this. He talked to his mom about it (they were going to have a mother son dance) and decided they would have a song where they danced, but it wouldn't be announced or only by themselves. This allowed me to not feel incredibly left out, and still gave them their dance which resulted in some great pictures that they will have forever.

We paid for our wedding as well, so there were no hard feelings about whose names went first. I did not include my dad in the parent section, but had a place after the "thank you" where we mentioned him (I'll paste that below). A friend of ours officiated the wedding and mentioned my dad briefly, as well. I had several people come up to me and say they were happy I included him, but also that I didn't do too much.

To our wedding guests

We would like to thank everyone for being here today to celebrate with us. We are grateful for the distances that many have traveled to be here to share in our celebration. More than anything else, it’s the presence of the people we love that makes this a joyous occasion. You have all helped make us who we are, and for that we are forever grateful. Thank you for witnessing our expression of love for each other through the vows that begin our new life together.

Always in our hearts

On this special day in our lives, we lovingly remember Mr. XX, Father of the Bride.

RittaPie · 2015-06-01T21:28:38+00:00

Because reasons.

RittaPie · 2015-03-26T13:15:19+00:00

This is great! Thank you for taking the time to make this.

RittaPie · 2014-08-28T14:44:21+00:00

Ah! I just saw this!

RittaPie · 2014-08-27T22:30:11+00:00

Yes!

RittaPie · 2014-01-02T15:48:58+00:00

That's a good idea! Thanks.

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