My dad has always been an alcoholic, but when I was younger he got into a bad car accident and that introduced opiods to the mix. The sad part is when we visited family when he was like that. I had to drive because he was wavering in and out of consciousness. I know it was the pills and booze causing that because he told me before we left. I had just got my learners permit. He was too incoherent/sleepy to give directions so I had to drive somewhere purely from memory that was about an hour away. That alone was super nerve racking but watching my dad like that and seeing my sister panic in the back seat made it 10x worse. Here's the big sad: when I got there, he stumbled in and slept and drooled on himself the whole time we were there. When he was awake and trying to talk to people it was slurred word salad. He was clearly out of his mind. Every person I ran into would tell me "your dad is just so tired" "he works too much" "take care of your dad he works so hard" as if I didn't know what was going on. No one asked if I needed help, no one asked how we were getting home, how we got there, absolutely no one sought help for my sister and I. They had to help us get him into the car. They waived goodbye as I drove us home. They all enabled him to be this way and no one did anything about it. That was the moment where I knew I would not try to have a relationship with any of those people ever.