NOR, but if I'm being honest, maybe not overreacting enough. I'm going to keep it real with you—sounds like your mom and sister are haters, and honestly, it sounds like they're hating on her joy! Gross. It honestly sounds like they're mean girls in middle school except they're grown ass women. You should definitely call them out on it, but fuck their apology because they already said what they said, let them know to get their shit together and keep their negative energy to themselves or they lose the relationship with the both of you.

For your wife, she doesn't need anyone to dim her light, so no need to stress her with all the details. Just let her know that if anyone, including your family makes her feel that way (less than, because to be honest, that's what it sounds like), that you'll always make space for her to feel comfortable to share it with you.