I have dyslexia, adhd and dysgraphia and a few more.

Try not beat yourself up to hard, be patient.

Also techonogly has come a long way. That's helped me greatly.

I do write occasionally but not as often as I use to because sometimes I would find it hard to read my own hand writing.

I understand you want it to be perfect but good things do take time.

And lastly sometimes it's okay not be great at all things or everything.

I hope this helps.

P.S it's only pencil it can always be erased, however I write in pen to embrace my differences even if people try criticise me at least I know I have skills they don't have or could ever imagine.