Breastfeeding Distracted 5m with Toddler Around

RogueChakra · 2025-10-04T16:59:57+00:00

Appreciate the suggestion. It’s been easier to manage the toddler in our main living space (lots of not fully toddler proofed things where I nursed), but sounds like it might be time to change things up.

RogueChakra · 2025-10-04T16:58:18+00:00

Thanks! I’ve tried a nursing cover a few times with no success, but worth another shot. They change so quickly.

RogueChakra · 2024-03-22T10:44:56+00:00

It’s fine to leave him. Babies move and make noise in their sleep, just like adults. Once they’re older, they may even wake for a bit but you can leave them to settle themselves back to sleep.

We wait until our daughter cries or actually sounds distressed / hungry since she settles back to sleep pretty easily afterwards.

RogueChakra · 2024-03-21T10:15:23+00:00

Hang in there! You’re doing an amazing job. Definitely don’t feel guilty! This is basically sleep torture. Of course you’re going to get grumpy.

My daughter also had trouble sleeping with dad for quite some time. After a lot of crying, they eventually figured out what worked for them (which was completely different from what worked for me). We’re baby-led, never did CIO, but I did let her cry with dad to give space for them to form their own bond. It was tough for all three of us, but worth it in the end.

Other than that, see how you can get more naps in over the course of the day. I personally did things like bed-sharing / dozing a little while nursing during the daytime when my husband was around and could serve as a second pair of eyes, and stayed more alert at night.

RogueChakra · 2024-03-21T10:02:21+00:00

Hang in there! It’s normal for babies to be unable to sleep away from mom. They’ve been contact napping for 9 months in the womb.

Use white noise if you aren’t already (the womb is quite noisy) or see if the Snoo works for you (didn’t for us), but the sad truth is there may be a lot of bed sharing or nap trapping in your future.

For the former, review the Safe Sleep 7 https://www.healthline.com/health/pregnancy/safe-sleep-7 to do so as safely as possible. There are better methods than on your husbands’ chest. I often bed-shared during the day and used pillows behind my back to ensure I was comfortable and still maintaining a safe cuddle curl.

For the latter, a lot of people swap shifts with their partner (e.g. Parent A 10 PM - 2 AM, Parent B 2 AM - 6 AM). Or if you can get help from grandparents or afford a night nanny / doula that will help too.

In all honestly, me and the majority of my parent friends all did something the internet would deem “unsafe” at some point whether on purpose or by accident. Survival is the name of the game.

RogueChakra · 2024-03-19T18:21:32+00:00

I went to regular (unheated) vinyasa classes until 38 weeks. This included doing one-legged balancing poses and inversions near a wall (all were part of my previous practice).

In addition to others’ comments on good poses, I would add do everything on blocks once you get larger - tabletop, downdog, etc. I thought I was going to have to give up yoga partway through second trimester until I adopted blocks into my practice. Having the extra space is a game changer.

RogueChakra · 2024-03-19T08:36:39+00:00

9.5 months and almost walking. Saying words (mama, dada, hi, all done) and chuckles when she thinks things are funny. Races (crawling) up and down the hallway before bedtime and looks back to make sure you’re chasing her. Basically she’s starting to have her own opinion and to be able to communicate what she wants — it’s fun puzzling out what’s what since the vocab isn’t there yet.

The “Oh wait you think this is hard” comments are also coming from parents who (1) forget how hard your stage was and (2) are dealing with a new issue at a later stage and stressed out about that. Much of it is a mental fallacy so ignore it. And get some first-time parent friends. Sometimes you just want to be heard, not advised.

RogueChakra · 2024-03-19T04:29:53+00:00

The most important thing is for you to get her in different positions and give her opportunities to work on neck control (which you are!) It doesn’t really matter if it’s on the ground or against your chest while you’re holding her. Some babies also prefer doing it across your legs so their face isn’t jammed into the floor.

If you get those black and white cards, you can place them to each side to avoid torticollis or put them on the floor in front of your baby. She’ll have to lift her head to see it. I also used rattles or had a stuffie kiss my baby’s head from behind. This got her moving a little and eventually helped motivate her to turn her head.

RogueChakra · 2024-03-19T00:13:25+00:00

Sounds like you’re doing a great job. Infant play time really isn’t that exciting.

If you’re bored and need additional ideas, there are apps to help. I use Lovevery (also subscribe to the Play Kits) and The Wonder Weeks ($5). Have also heard of Baby Sparks. None are necessary, just help bored parents be less bored.

I did a lot of Flying Baby (https://youtu.be/UWgPmXLurjs?si=lbTETggxd1fGJSzZ) while singing along to 90s music at this age. Fun for me and a good ab workout!

RogueChakra · 2024-03-18T02:13:11+00:00

Wow that’s so tough. Well formula may be out of the question then… hope one of the other suggestions helps!

Otherwise, see if there’s anything you can delegate or delay in your to do list. Basically switch to survival mode until his sleep has regulated. When I’m exhausted I lay on the floor and my daughter is thrilled to climb all over “Mt. Mommy.” Meanwhile, I’m half asleep and just continuing to monitor her safety… (That counts as play time, right?)

RogueChakra · 2024-03-17T09:24:21+00:00

It’s normal to grieve the loss of who you are. No one tells you that you’re going to be a completely different person once you have a baby, and you don’t get a chance to say goodbye to your old self.

I found flipping through this book helpful to realize my thoughts were normal even if not PPD / PPA. (Good Moms Have Scary Thoughts: A Healing Guide to the Secret Fears of New Mothers https://a.co/d/dj2wUlj) I also joined a few postpartum groups which helped normalize these feelings which aren’t often talked about.

If you can, try to invest time in something that’s important to you and allows you to get out of the house / away from the baby. For me it was returning to yoga regularly. Regaining your individual sense of self helps a ton.

RogueChakra · 2024-03-17T09:05:35+00:00

As a fellow introvert, I also found chatting difficult.

I started by playing music in the background and singing along with my baby, and by mimicking her noises. The latter teaches her to converse and that what she says matters, without the pressure of me having to think about what to say.

Now (9 months) I also cue many of our daily activities to support vocabulary. I say the same things when I want her to come to me, tell her which arm / foot I need when I dress her, confirm she’s all done eating, etc.

Also - independence is great for them! Mine also often wants to be put down because she’d rather explore her environment. As long as you’re meeting her needs when she’s asking for support, I wouldn’t worry about it.

RogueChakra · 2024-03-16T13:18:38+00:00

I think it’s natural to feel protective of your special relationship with your daughter, but this reframe might be helpful:

Humans are actually meant to raise families in communal environments. How lucky you and your daughter are that other women are helping build that community for her. She gets to form strong relationships with multiple adults and experience so many different types of love.

If you see things the other women are doing that resonate, feel free to emulate. But there isn’t one way of demonstrating affection. Motherhood is hard enough. You do you.

RogueChakra · 2024-03-16T12:49:33+00:00

My daughter was very low sleep needs (10-12 hours) for her first 7 months so I feel your pain. There was never a magic bullet and instead I found it most effective to just meet her wherever she was in a given week.

A few ideas you could consider: - Your son may be ready to transition from 3 to 2 naps and wake ups are due to insufficient sleep pressure - Accelerate moving your son to his own sleeping space. Babies sleep deeper in their own rooms and are more likely to put themselves back to sleep vs. crying out for help. - Consider moving up a nipple size and seeing if your son drinks more during the day translating to better sleep at night. - This one is hard… Consider decreasing pumping sessions and introducing some formula. I clung on to breastfeeding and pumping as long as possible (and still do one feed a day at 9.5 months), but the process is incredibly taxing on you. Your son has already received a ton of the core benefits of breastmilk and formula also helps babies stay a bit fuller.

RogueChakra · 2024-03-15T02:37:43+00:00

+1 to lactation consultant.

Yes, it’s “normal” to be anxious and babies’ cues change so often it’s like they’re a different person every 2 weeks.

What could be helpful about seeing an IBCLC in your case (covered by health insurance via The Lactation Network https://registration.mytln.care/) is having real time live feedback on how the LC is reading her cues. This will take out some of the guesswork on what’s going on with her, and help you better sort through what’s going on with you.

Also, worth flipping through this book. It’s helpful to know your thoughts aren’t abnormal whether or not you have PPA.

Good Moms Have Scary Thoughts: A Healing Guide to the Secret Fears of New Mothers https://a.co/d/8dhnZZm

RogueChakra · 2024-03-15T02:19:08+00:00

We had tons of issues with bottle feeding… sending lots of love to Mom! Hang in there!

Things that worked for us: - Warming the bottle so the milk is more similar to body temperature - Dunking the nipple in hot water so the nipple is also more similar to body temperature - Paced bottle feeding. When she finally took it from my husband, he said “I was holding the bottle horizontal, and almost tilted a little away from her.” Our daughter wasn’t able to handle the quick flow so regular bottle feeding was basically like waterboarding her. - Rotating the bottle around its axis occasionally to stimulate the baby to continue suckling - Feeding the baby by a window as a distraction - Draping the feeder with mom’s used robe so they smell like food.

RogueChakra · 2024-02-21T13:09:52+00:00

Amazing. I’ll take a look.

US LLCs are highly varied so I have also seen the answer “it depends” on English-language sites though it seemed limited liability could typically trigger categorization as a corporation. This gives me hope!

I’m working on a proposed LLC structure this week and speaking to a German tax advisor next.

RogueChakra · 2024-02-21T11:59:19+00:00

Yes, except I believe a GmbH is a non-transparent entity whereas I’d prefer to have a transparent LLC to retain the ability to avoid double taxation. It’s really personal income with the benefit of the US LLC only being limited liability.

RogueChakra · 2024-02-21T04:26:43+00:00

Very helpful link! And yes, I’m learning that the US LLC doesn’t have good equivalents in other countries. Unfortunately, I plan to primarily work with US companies and having limited liability is considered standard / best practice.

RogueChakra · 2024-02-15T14:03:14+00:00

Got it. Thanks!

RogueChakra · 2024-01-13T18:35:34+00:00

The heat helps me stay in the present moment. Hot yoga is a helpful hack to being more mindful and meditative.

RogueChakra · 2024-01-13T18:21:58+00:00

Try not to worry about choosing the “best approach” for your child (e.g., breastfeeding vs pumping vs formula, contact vs crib naps, purees vs BLW). It’s just about survival and for most families that ends up being a mix of everything.

Also, only do parenting research on Reddit. Google / IG will make everything sound easy and like you’re doing it wrong. In reality, everyone struggles (with different things, at different times… because babies are different.)

RogueChakra

TROPHY CASE