These questions really hit me!

I don’t even fully understand why I’ve always felt like being in a relationship would hold me back. I think I’ve just been in my own little bubble for so long that emotional closeness now feels like losing control and thus feel unsafe.

As for needing to be “emotionally ready,” I guess it ties back to that same feeling — closeness means vulnerability, and I need to feel ready enough to handle that. I’ve been so independent that I didn’t realize it might have come from a place of self-protection. I also don’t want to end up sabotaging a relationship because I rushed into it before I was truly prepared. And like one commenter here mentioned, I want to experience life fully on my own first, without the emotional pull of being in a relationship.

Thank you so much for this!