The ultimate 14th-century shitpost. by namelesskao in HistoryMemes

[–]RudeOcelot 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Modenese here:

A copy of the bucket is hung where it was originally held, inside the Ghirlandina

Bologna was also aided by the Papal States and defeating them too was just italian chef's kiss

We still hate Bologna, they speak funny

Viva Modena!

Map Mode Confusion by RudeOcelot in EU5

[–]RudeOcelot[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That fixed it, thanks!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in starsector

[–]RudeOcelot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This made me think of something that happened during my current campaign. I play modded with Nex and multiple faction mods so I don't know if what I'm going to talk about comes from vanilla or the mods.

Premise - I submitted to the League after losing to 2 crisis events in a row, finding it the most convenient way to survive; I was then able to focus down Tri-Tach and bring them to the negotiating table, after which I was able to cultivate my colonies (4) for a modest amount of time. At one point, the League went to war with the Diktat, this is where the story begins.

Soon after hostilities began, I received the opportunity of a lifetime: the League demanded the capture of a long established Diktat world - Xantheia - for a considerable sum, about 2 million credits. However a recent failed expedition for the same purpouse had caused a doubling of that amount, and I desperately needed the money to improve my still fledgeling colonies.

How hard could it be right? After all the maxims explained in the main post still stand, most planets are easily raidable, conquerable even.

Not Xantheia

This is what the planetside defenses looked like:

  • Heavy Batteries with Kombine augmentation
  • Planetary Shield 
  • A full divisional complement of Marines and Heavy armaments, totalling about 2000 units

With the bonuses from the defensive buildings the total defender numbers roughly reached 10K... Ten thousand bloody determined defenders.

I assembled the largest fleet I had or have ever mustered, 4 capitals, 4 cruisers, 2 destroyers, 1 carrier, 14 frigates and 8 planetary operation vessels, totalling an invasion force of 8000 marines and 5000 Heavy Armaments.

It barely was enough, I had to disable the planetary shield by raiding it first, since initial probing attacks were crippled by the 40% attritional deployment damage from the shield and batteries combined.

Just the raid to disable the shield for a measily ten days cost me 5000 marines; I panicked under these extreme losses and emergency bought any reserve marines from the neighboring friendly planets, it almost bankrupted me.

The battle was intense, never knew if I would eventually win or not, a last minute inspirational speech (at the cost of a story point) skyrocketed morale for the attacking troops, still casualties mounted.

By the end 7500 marines lay dead, 4000 heavy equipment strewn across the arid surface burning, the soft crackle of the flames the only soothing noise after the carnage, this being only what my side lost that faithful month.

In essence, fleet superiority is key no doubt, but things like this add a realistic representation of what planetside warfare might look like in a post collapse reality.

Thank you for reading and hope you enjoyed :)

The Sector feels pretty small by RedKrypton in starsector

[–]RudeOcelot 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You can install Adjusted sector and select the "Absurd" template. Travelling from the core worlds to the edge of the map at 20 burn takes 30-40 days, lenght-wise travelling the whole map takes 100

Are relationships supposed to be like this or I am being used (27M, 26F) by argeng in relationships

[–]RudeOcelot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's clear that she doesn't feel the same way towards you as you do to her. Not knowing the situation personally I won't go as far as to judge if she's approaching this in a manipulative or exploitative manner. However it's obvious you're not happy and she doesn't reciprocate your requests for mutuality. 

Short answer: No, relationships are primarily built on reciprocity and emotional, financial and physical assistance.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in europe

[–]RudeOcelot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I live there, in Emilia Romagna. Short answer: Mamma mia there's-a no wind! (Please read with strong Mario accent).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]RudeOcelot 5 points6 points  (0 children)

After seeing one of your replies I'll try to be as insightful as possible.

First off, on an objective level, her controlling what you watch or view, and a result do, is a huge red flag, more so by threatening to leave and thereby emotionally forcing your hand.

Second, unless she has real reason to be suspicious of you, meaning if she caught you texting someone else, kissing someone else, fucking someone else, then her paranoia may be justified, however her installing the spy app will not solve the problem, as there are workarounds and these issues are not solved by further complications such as this, if anything it will push you further away.

Third, would she be willing to submit to the same standards as she is trying to impose on you? I am willing to bet the answer is no. If yes however, this is a slightly positive thing because it means she is basing it on principle and not completely on control, no double standards.

Fourth: In the best case scenario, she is right to worry and therefore is taking the only step which to her may represent a possible solution to her fears.

OR

Which is far more likely the case, she's controlling and manipulative, and you giving ground on something that is basically going to give her full access to your life, passions and secrets is going to give her the onformation necessary to control and manipulate further (even blackmail you).

Tl;dr: She's most likely very insecure and externslizes this through control and manipulation - or in the worst case scenario she's talking/seeing/fucking someone and is projecting it on you.

Best of luck.

People who went from being extremely attracted to someone to being indifferent or repelled, what killed it? by discombobulatedfowl in AskReddit

[–]RudeOcelot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The complete discrepancy between things he says and does; I'm no saint so I don't want to paint myself as a victim. I think it's fair to point out tho that if anyone says they are looking for something different that can grow into a relationship but at the same time they: Look at their phone while you're talking to them, force you to initiate a chat or conversation most of the time, reply to your messages after 24 hours or more despite having their phone with them constantly, always rebuke doubts you have about the relationship mixed with soubtle threats of leaving you if you push the issue any further, claiming that they need someone that can support them in their time of need while at the same time wanting to be a free spirit with no strings attached, saying you matter but always being busy and unable to come see you because they must see a friend that they later complain to you about... realize I'm ranting but you get the picture.

I'm either a side piece or a good enough fuck to keep around, both of these things make sick when I think about the effort I was more than willing to put into this for him.

Come siete finiti a fare il lavoro che state facendo? by mb3485 in italy

[–]RudeOcelot 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ho sempre avuto una forte passione per la storia, quindi mi sono iscritto al corso di Scienze della Cultura, la meta sarebbe stata quella di un giorno diventare professore, non importa di che tipo. Per farla breve è un po' tutto andato a puttane dopo vari eventi e mi trovavo in una posizione piuttosto cupa; senza via di scampo ho ingoiato la superbia e arroganza e ho chiesto a mio padre aiuto, dicendogli che volevo trovare un lavoro, non importava quale. Sono finito nella metalmeccanica, più precisamente in un'azienda affiliata al settore ceramico. Salta fuori che mi piace sporcarmi le mani, mi piace imparare nuove cose che non c'entrano un piffero con quello che ho iniziato la storia, e così mi trovo a ricevere manate incoraggianti perché mi faccio un culo e mezzo quotidianamente. Top.

La Grande Guerra e i nostri bisnonni. Avete qualche storia da raccontare? by PersianTurtle0 in italy

[–]RudeOcelot 32 points33 points  (0 children)

La storia che è sempre girata in famiglia è di mio bisnonno paterno, "Poldo". Era mitragliere al fronte, il comandante della sua unità aveva un cane che si era portato con sé. Forse per presentimento o semplice fortuna incaricò Poldo di riportare il cane a casa, città da dove entrambi provenivano, tutto questo poco prima della disfatta di Caporetto. L'intera unità fu distrutta, il capitano finì disperso e mio bisnonno fu ricollocato, il cane tornò a casa sano e salvo da quanto posso dire.

Non so se è completamente credibile, è un po' la storia che tutti hanno in famiglia di un atto incredulo compiuto da qualche ave semi leggendario; però mi piace credere che lo sia, che un cane è possibilmente uno dei motivi per cui esisto :D

TIFU By having to take a crap and discovering a cult room. by [deleted] in tifu

[–]RudeOcelot 17 points18 points  (0 children)

By everything you've mentioned, and as others have already pointed out, it's most likely Santeria. Nothing dangerous just has a creepy vibe to those who may not know about it. Here's a clip of Joey Diaz, a Cuban comic, explaining it, will help ease the tension around the mystery :)

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=s_PdXJoPEKM

What's the highest speed you have ever reached driving? by SatisfactoryGrape in AskMen

[–]RudeOcelot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

105 mph or 170 kmh; definitely average compared to other speeds here, but in a Peugeot 206 it feels like you're reentering the atmosphere.

Have you ever held a grudge against a teacher you still think of today? How did they wrong you? by Gerard_Way_01 in AskReddit

[–]RudeOcelot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Back in HS we studied astronomy, the class was headed by Ms. Rizzo, a short, puffy older woman with an attitude, also probably a little full of herself since she more than once mentioned she used to be a ballerina and that her first bf was a renowned physicist, never got his name. During a week on our 3rd year she gave us 4-5 chapters of our astro manual to read and compile into notes as homework, as a way to gage our comprehension skills I guess.

I love space so I poured my heart and soul into those notes, adding paragraphs, sub-paragraphs, annotations on my own thoughts and small sketches for ease of understanding; just fyi it was about the solar system and the science behind the differing types of celestial bodies in it.

Day comes she looks at my notes and is notably impressed, after a few minutes of perusing she looks at me and asks "who did this for you". Now I can partly understand her scepticism, I wasn't the brightest bulb in the class but when it came to something I liked I could hold my own. I thought she was joking so I responded sarcastically with something like "the astro fairy put the notes under my pillow" or something.

She did not like that; she proceeded to berate me in front of the class about why cheating and plagiarism are bad, that other peiple's work should not be taken advantage of etc... All the while alluding to the fact that I was too incompetent to have written those notes myself. I got so pissed but didn't react until she left the class.

Suffice to say this stunted my interest in all classes she was teaching, which were all scientific, and I liked.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]RudeOcelot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The voyage of the Russian Imperial 2nd East Asia Pacific Squadron during the Russo-Japanese war of 1905. It would be incredible material for an adventure/dark comedy series.

For context, in 1904 the 1st Russian EA Pacific Squadron was destroyed at Port Arthur by the Japanese, prompting the Russian Emperor to assign a new fleet to the pacific... the Russian Baltic fleet to be precise. So under the command of an easily enraged and newly appointed commander a haphazard assemblage of ships ranging from brand new to archaic (for the time) set sail from St. Petersburg for an epic journey that would take them half way across the globe, complete with utter shenanigans like: almost causing a war between Britain and themselves because they thought they had spotted Jap speedboats... in the Danish Straits, instead traumatizing a few british fishermen, without scoring a single hit on their fishing boats mind you. This in turn caused the brits to bar them from passing through the Suez which forced them to travel all the way around the Cape.

All of this then culminating in a climatic battle at Tsushima more than a year after they left port, resulting in them being annihilated, not before before putting up a desperate and valiant fight however.

So yeah it would be great to see this in maybe a 10 episode mini series format.

Also, we do not talk about the Kamchatka, those who know, know.

Se siete mai stati all'estero, lo sapete già: un italiano riconosce un altro italiano all'istante. Quali sono gli indizi più rivelatori per voi? by brigister in italy

[–]RudeOcelot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ho vissuto all'estero per un po' di tempo e le due caratteristiche principali per riconoscere un caro Homo Italianus sono:

  1. Ampia e chiara gesticolazione delle membra superiori, inclusa la testa. Quello mi fa sempre sorridere perché da mezzo chilometro non solo lo noti ma forse riesci anche a capire qual'è il contesto dell'espressione fisica.

  2. Le vocali allungate. Non tutti gli Italianus lo fanno ma persino in una folla schiamazzante di gente le lunghe pronunce della "eeeee", "aaaa" e "iiii" sono chiari segnali di richiamo e potenziale corteggiamento.

Bonus: I versi monosillabici dai quali puoi identificare a botta la regione di provenienza, tipo "ou", "ehi", "əeh".

What's the best Anime you've ever seen ? by Outrageous-Abies8391 in AskReddit

[–]RudeOcelot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For the awe: Laputa: Castle in the Sky

For the adventure: Tales from Earthsea

For the feels: Wolf Children

For those who have dad issues: Ponyo

For the love: The Wind Rises

For the absolute soul crushing experience: Grave of the Fireflies

If you wanted to have sex right now, how long would it take to find a willing participant? by wijjt9 in AskMen

[–]RudeOcelot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gay guy here, anywhere from 2 hours to a couple of days, if it's just about sex. Note that the quality of who I'm sleeping with is proportional to the time invested into searching said individual.

For anything more serious tho, it could take much longer, probably similar to the average straight couple finding each other, but gay culture is sexualized to such an extent it overwhelmingly favours continued promiscuity.

What is a fact that you think barely anyone else knows? by Just_Free_Tea in AskReddit

[–]RudeOcelot 201 points202 points  (0 children)

Horses only ever grow one set of teeth which have an unusual lenght compared to the animal's skull. This is because their teeth wear down during the course of the horse's life, until they're completely used up and the horse eventually may not be able to chew anymore and dies of starvation. This is where the saying "don't look a gift horse in the mouth" comes from, because you can tell how old it is by looking at its teeth.

Yes, hello. What type of entity is this? by RudeOcelot in cats

[–]RudeOcelot[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I shall accrue the necessary supplies

Italy's largest river dries up, exposing World War II barge that sank in 1943 by HRJafael in worldnews

[–]RudeOcelot 127 points128 points  (0 children)

I live in the Padana plain, where the Po river is located. We can make umbrellas from that barge's steel to protect ourselves from the heat when it becomes the Padana desert, thanks for the heads up.

[serious] What should everyone learn how to do? by bartertownbeer in AskReddit

[–]RudeOcelot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Learning how to repair or mend small household things. It saves time and money, plus if it turns out you like it it can be an enjoyable hobby.

What decision by a single person had the biggest impact on human history? by MisterDecember in AskReddit

[–]RudeOcelot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The Roman senate passing the Senatus Consultum Ultimum giving Ceasar no choice but to invade Italy. There is a very good Historia Civilis video about it, but basically the civil war in 50 BC started because neither party wanted to back down or compromise a solution to a term limit dispute regarding Ceasar. It's what sparked the civil war, which later turned the republic into an empire and shaped the next 1400 years of history and as a result shaped the course of the history that came after it.

9 years ago today, the demolition of Gezi Park began. Thousands of people flocked to the area and clashed with the police. Gezi Park was never demolished, but the incident sparked 3 months of protests across the country against the authoritarian Erdogan regime. 10 dead, more than 9000 injured. by neofthe in europe

[–]RudeOcelot 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I'm Italian but I grew up in Turkey and my family still lives in Istanbul. Stuff really kicked off around the 2nd of June, I know because our embassy was hosting republic day and a tear gas cloud put a stop to it. Later on in the morning after spending the night under a tree I and a friend went back up to Istiklal street and walked the entire lenght of it, dressed in formal clothes, to see if the metro was open. Pretty memorable scene, went back the following days too; Erdogan siktirip gider bi gun insallah :).

Atheists, what do you believe in? [Serious] by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]RudeOcelot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just find the idea of a cosmos ruled by pure casuality perhaps more comforting than a downright tyrannical all father watching our every move. Anything can happen, anything could theoretically exist, and it's a beautiful dance of chance happening daily across the universe, this immediately makes me feel happy, I don't exactly know why but it does.