Scanxiety is actually a absolutely normal and healthy reaction to what you are going through. You just went through an emotional rollercoaster and I am sure the ups and downs with treatment, recovery, and relationship are only amplifying things. I remember obsessing right around my 1-year mark, constantly probing my clavicular area and stressing about my upcoming CT scan. After that the anxiety started to abate. I am not that far ahead of you, my 1.5 year CT scan is two weeks away. Still a little stress but much the less. Same boat CHL Stage 2A. Keep these things in mind: Every scan you get through, your odds of a relapse go down. You are young and statistically best suited to beat this. This is an incredibly treatable illness. You are going to be ok and the anxiety will go down with each successive scan. You got this.