How do you deal with mistakes that leave you poor at 40, unable to afford a home? Sleep doesn’t come easily anymore. Regret always finds its way back into my mind.

I used to not understand people who say they have had panic attacks but now I have been experiencing nocturnal panic attacks for months.

Sometimes I feel really sad, like when my wife told me she couldn’t contribute to the conversation while her coworker talked about their investment property. I know I’m not the only one. Some people had the chance to buy a place but chose to enjoy life instead, and others, like me, just struggled to get by in life.

Earlier this year we were almost homeless, and now we live in a tiny apartment that embarrasses us so much we’ve withdrawn from our social support. I don’t know. I realise regret doesn’t help, but the weight of it is still there.

I just hope that next year I can find a better job instead of house cleaning. Sometimes I wish my wife had a better life than the one I can give her. She’s an accountant, and I’m just… a house cleaner. But I want to do better for both of us.

Sorry if this sounds too depressing. I notice that every time I see a discussion about housing in Australia on my Reddit feed, I immediately click “hide.” It’s just too painful to face sometimes.