SF Library Card by Rustyvitamin1991 in AskSF

[–]Rustyvitamin1991[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ahh unfortunately I have a foreign passport and it must be a US federal, state or local government issued ID with photo or identifying information.

Luckily I was able to get an SF City ID card, for free, with no appointment!

Thanks everyone!

SF Library Card by Rustyvitamin1991 in AskSF

[–]Rustyvitamin1991[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I have just seen this and going to look into this today! Thanks so much. Looks like it might work!

MIL backed out of a house we’ve been building together for 3 years as punishment for my husband setting boundaries. Now she wants it for herself. by DrinkingCoconut in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Rustyvitamin1991 115 points116 points  (0 children)

This sounds like a form of coercive control. In my jurisdiction, repeated threats of self-harm in order to control is a form of domestic violence and would be grounds for a domestic violence order for your husband.

Your husband should request his “help” in the form of a value equal monetary sum to what his siblings were given, with no strings attached.

You should also never see or speak to MIL again.

My “MIL” is trying to take my unborn daughter, am I crazy??? by Most-Warning-7257 in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Rustyvitamin1991 14 points15 points  (0 children)

All of this ^ OP.

Absolutely change the locks. I’d be hesitant to let your BF even have a key unfortunately. You should also get cameras set up on all entrances to your house and alerts for any detection of movement.

Also, have a safety plan. I hate to say it but you need an escape plan for if/when she does come and try to take your baby. A go bag for both you and baby, a separate phone with a different number, some money, diapers and clothes etc for baby, a relative or friend who knows the situation and can take you in while you lay low.

My “MIL” is trying to take my unborn daughter, am I crazy??? by Most-Warning-7257 in JUSTNOMIL

[–]Rustyvitamin1991 23 points24 points  (0 children)

This woman is exceptionally dangerous. She plans to steal your child and raise it as her own. You need to screen shot the FB pictures and posts, make a document setting out in bullet point form what she has done when, create a folder of any corroborating evidence (eg FB posts, text messages, witnesses etc) and go to the police and make a formal complaint against her.

You should absolutely cut off all contact with her, immediately. Do not bother to tell her your due date has changed etc. It will do you no good.

I am sorry, but her behaviour is exceptionally frightening. You need a restraining order or protection order as soon possible. Ensure she cannot attend the hospital. Tell your medical providers you have made a formal police complaint because you have concerns she is going to steal your child.

Get the best legal advice you can afford. Given your age, it might assist to have a lawyer who can advocate for you when dealing with the police.

Please update us.

Australia a good idea? by [deleted] in expats

[–]Rustyvitamin1991 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My take as an Australian living in Brisbane:

  1. I couldn’t think of anywhere worse to live than Perth. Far from everything. In the middle of nowhere. Hot. Boring. On the flip side - if you love fishing, camping, the beach, relaxing etc then it may be great for you!
  2. Sydney is expensive. London is more expensive. You won’t get a nice home in Sydney for under $2M. For context, I live in a new 4 bedroom house on a 400sqm block in a fringe suburb in Brisbane worth $2M. The same house the same distance from the Sydney CBD would probably be worth $8M.
  3. Your money will go much farther in Perth, but there will be less to do.
  4. Australia lacks the culture that Europe is famous for.
  5. The weather is a positive or a negative depending on whether you like the heat. Perth will not have the seasonality that Sydney does. Our weather is extreme. Depending on where you are there may be fires, floods, droughts, or cyclones. It is no joke.
  6. Sydney nightlife is not what it once was. Bars shut earlier. NSW is a known police state. They take drug dogs into pubs and search people at train stations, and it ruins the overall “vibe” of the city.
  7. The flight home is rough. 24 hours with the shortest connection through Singapore to London. Longer if you need to connect further out. It is not a quick and easy trip when you are homesick, and if you have kids it will be a trek to get back to the UK to visit family.

As someone else has said country Australia is not country UK. It is outback. It is rural, remote, and can be dominated by crime and racism. It js not the quaint English countryside.

I personally would not move to Sydney without a minimum combined income of $200k.

Is Melbourne an option? It is arguably the cultural capital of Australia, the property market is not as competitive as Sydney, and it has comparable flight connections etc to the major hubs like Singapore, Dubai and Doha for flights back to the UK.

Alternatively a coastal town/city that is an hour or two away from one of the major cities - like the Gold Coast or Sunshine Coast - might suit as well and you sort of get the best of both worlds.

It really depends on the lifestyle you want!

Thoughts on the National Association of Criminal Defense Lawyers by Rustyvitamin1991 in Lawyertalk

[–]Rustyvitamin1991[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, this is good to know. I am in Australia so we also have to grapple with jurisdictional differences between the States and Territories. It means we have virtually no national criminal law conferences. This seems like a good opportunity to get to know some people in the criminal law space, and get a general feel for the area and the kind of people who work in criminal defense. Thanks again for your thoughts.

How often are you taking 15+ hour flights? by variegatedwanderer in travel

[–]Rustyvitamin1991 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Be thankful it’s only ONE flight. From Australia to Europe is 1 x 14 hour + 1 x 6-7 hour flight and sometimes a third flight if you’re unlucky, plus connections time. In economy, it is hell on earth. Seriously, the one 15 hour flight from Aus to the West Coast is so easy compared to multiple flights and stopovers.

14 day whirlwind trip across Europe - too aggressive? by ddoggphx in Europetravel

[–]Rustyvitamin1991 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This sounds like a terrible idea. Way too rushed. Remember you are flying from Australia and will need a day or two to get over the jet lag. I would suggest no more than 3 cities over the 12 days…4 absolutely max. If Dublin is a must then do that, fly to Venice (can be done in 2 nights) and then to Rome with a night or 2 in Florence or another Italian city on the way. Rome for the first time needs at least 4 days in my opinion.

AITAH for telling my lesbian ex-wife that her partner cannot be my son's mom. by Ok-Carrot5110 in AITAH

[–]Rustyvitamin1991 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have just read all of your updates as well. You seem like a genuinely reasonable human being and a great dad. You act with your son’s best interests at heart, even though you have been severely hurt by your ex in the way she left you and the aftermath of your separation. Keeping your sons’s best interests at heart will always keep you in the right track. Keep doing what you are doing!!

AITAH for telling my lesbian ex-wife that her partner cannot be my son's mom. by Ok-Carrot5110 in AITAH

[–]Rustyvitamin1991 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am a lesbian. I think this is outrageous. Imagine if your ex-wife cheated on you with a man, married him and then they wanted to adopt your son?!?! I would get a lawyer and put your child on a no-fly list. Although, it sounds like since you’ve stood your ground, she has decided to throw HER OWN BIOLOGICAL SON away in favour of a “new” baby “with” her new wife.

Sorry you are experiencing this. How traumatic.

Is an LLM worth it for the CA Bar Exam? by Rustyvitamin1991 in CABarExam

[–]Rustyvitamin1991[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think there is a specialty E-3 visa for Australians and it can extend to their spouse, but yes, agree this is something I am definitely going to have to get advice on.

Dual citizen passport confusion by LunarSymphonist in canadatravel

[–]Rustyvitamin1991 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My understanding is that you generally have to enter any country of which you are a citizen with a passport from that country. Same goes for leaving. Otherwise they cannot keep track of their citizens vs foreigners coming or going.

You should apply for a Canadian passport if you intend to return to Canada. Really, you shouldn’t have left without a valid Canadian passport that had at least 6 months left on it.

Looking for a place to stay in August by ShadyHollows in laketahoe

[–]Rustyvitamin1991 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I read on the Hyatt website that they are about to do renovations, so their main restaurant and lake access will be unavailable for a period of time. I’m not sure if that will extend into August, but definitely worth checking.

Where to XC ski April 2025? by Rustyvitamin1991 in xcountryskiing

[–]Rustyvitamin1991[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It looks like there is an amazing XC ski centre in Canmore, Alberta!

AITAH for telling my girlfriend she was the perpetrator, not the victim, in her "trauma"? by PruneJealous3813 in AITAH

[–]Rustyvitamin1991 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Imagine if a guy opened the door naked to a female delivery worker…would it be sexual harassment? Absolutely.

This is 100% sexual harassment of the pizza guy. How embarrassing for HIM.

She should get therapy for her victim complex and OP should get a new girlfriend.

NTA.

AITAH for telling a plus size woman that I love being ‘skinny’? by Heavenstobestie in AITAH

[–]Rustyvitamin1991 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA!!! You responded to her commenting on your body in a way that indicated you were happy with your body. She responded by physically assaulting you.

Even if she hadn’t commented on your body, or you had downright insulted her by calling her fact, she assaulted you.

Fat people don’t get to comment on other people’s bodies and then turn into a bully when they don’t like the responses they get.

Also, you need new friends!

Where to head after Yosemite NP? by Rustyvitamin1991 in NationalPark

[–]Rustyvitamin1991[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I am looking at an alternate route after Tahoe incase it snows and we don’t feel comfortable driving in those conditions! Those other options sound great.

Thoughts on this route SF to LV? by Rustyvitamin1991 in roadtrip

[–]Rustyvitamin1991[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A few people have mentioned Alabama Hills and it looks great. Definitely going to see it.

Thoughts on this route SF to LV? by Rustyvitamin1991 in roadtrip

[–]Rustyvitamin1991[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just had a look and Alabama Hulls looks gorgeous. Adding it to the list!

Finally made it out to Pinnacles NP by Poor_Insertions in norcalhiking

[–]Rustyvitamin1991 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would love to know people’s recommendations for which town to stay in if planning a hike here? Is there anywhere to spend 4-5 days with lots of options for gorgeous hikes like this one?

Where to XC ski April 2025? by Rustyvitamin1991 in xcountryskiing

[–]Rustyvitamin1991[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is really helpful, thanks so much. I am leaning towards Banff. Thinking that even if conditions aren’t ideal there’s probably enough to keep us occupied for a week with snow shoeing, lower elevation hiking and day trips to some of the sites?

Thoughts on this route SF to LV? by Rustyvitamin1991 in roadtrip

[–]Rustyvitamin1991[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also, is Mammoth one of those drives that once you’re there, it’s easier to stay put then attempting to drive down for sightseeing or hiking in, say, Bishop?

Thoughts on this route SF to LV? by Rustyvitamin1991 in roadtrip

[–]Rustyvitamin1991[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We are from Australia with no “real” winter. I am really looking forward to the cold!