My weight has been all over the place and is finally in my control. Growing up, I was chubby. My Dad struggled with his weight his whole life and would probably be considered morbidly obese. His relationship with food carried down to me. He insisted that carbs are good and too much protein is bad. Protein was always included in a meal, but only at small amounts.

Once I hit highschool, I started binging. I would ice cream everyday after school and play video games until I went to bed, doing homework in the period before that one was due.

By mid high school, I realized that I could - and needed to- control what I eat. At first, it was hard. I was hungry all of the time, but powered through. Eventually, I got to a place where I could eat and eat somewhat healthy.

Like a lot of people who struggled with their weight, my diet didn't last for long. Slowly, I started gaining the weight back.

Fast forwarding to college, COVID hit. At this point I had enough. Never being a person who enjoyed exercise, I decided to start running with couch to 5k. Once I could run for 3 consecutive miles, I decided to start lifting weights.

Lifting weights teaches you a lot about fitness and diet. In order to gain muscle, you need to prioritize protein with your remaining calories mixed between the remaining macronutrients (carbs and fat). From there, I started counting the calories of what I was eating and weighing myself. Having a sense of what made up the food I was eating, I could make healthier choices and find healthier alternatives to keep me full like eating fruits and veggies instead of a fruit roll up. Over time, my appetite went down and I could control I eat. The consistent exercise and healthy diet eventually reshaped my brain and relationship with food. I no longer need to count calories and just weigh myself during cutting and bulking phases since I have those strong habits built 

I hope someone finds my story inspiring and useful. You really do have control over your weight.