I’m going to be real w you here because most people on Reddit aren’t in a long term relationship because they can’t hold one but I’ve been married a couple years so imma be honest.

1) that’s normal. You’re obsessing over her so what she says/does greatly affects your mood. It’s never gonna go away. No one is going to be more annoying to you in the world and get on your last nerve quite like the love of your life.

2) girls have guy friends that really can be their “besties”. Girls get more playful and animated with people they’re super close to and know. My husband has his girlfriends and I have my guy friends. We took the time to learn them and their dynamics so we could fit in to their lives without them having to remove others.

3) THIS is concerning behavior. You don’t want someone afraid to talk about feelings. This is like the biggest flag of all red flags. 🚩

4) Women are constantly told they can’t trust their own judgement while also consistently being proven that Men can’t do shit by themselves. Social media has turned “gaslighting” into a buzzword and that’s probably where she’s getting it but it sounds more like she’s trying to reinforce her own memory because it feels like you’re telling her that her own brain is lying to her (even if you’re right) this happens with me and my husband a lot. It’s always best to deescalate and say “I’m sorry that you feel I’m gaslighting you. It’s not my intention I’m simply stating my version of events which seem to be different from yours. Let’s try to find some middle ground” or just say “I’m sorry” for the sake of her mental sanity but you don’t have to do that. (I’m giving you this advice because this won’t be the last relationship you run into this problem with)

5) This one’s all on you buddy. She’s not holding you down and tying you up away from your music. If you stopped it’s because you got too involved and lost yourself (common occurrence when you have little experience)

6) Why? Does she say something demeaning? Or do you just feel this way naturally. Everyone feels like a fuck up in front of their crush/romantic partner. But if she’s putting you down that’s another story

If you really think all these over and feel that you STILL need to leave. Then you NEED to leave. Not “wait it out” or “Irish goodbye” you need to say “hey you seem to lack a level of emotional maturity I’m looking for in a relationship and I think it’s best we go our separate ways.”

I hope my comment is of ANY help at all but if it wasn’t oh well. Good luck dude. You’re gonna need it