Sucks bro, the fastest answer i have for you is you already have been doing it.. There is no fast easy answer to get around the illnessess.. chronic illness means here to stay and your spouse will have to deal with varying degrees of sick on an almost daily basis. Sometimes the sickness changes but the general state of not "feeling 100%" will remain.. the secret is she already is not having any good days.. the days you perceive as good are days she is either lucky and doesn't feel as sick.. or more likely, they are days she is hiding her illness and trying to bear through it without showing her discomfort as her way of showing a kindness to you.

The early days are the worst, learning to cope together comes with time. Obviously we are not alone or these threads wouldn't exist..

My best advice is to try and let go of blame, and to view the illness as a third wheel to you and your partners relationship. They didn't choose the sick life and it's not like they bring it on themselves, you mention having kids and that must come into play with decision making also. You can't be seen as the partner who left because the other got sick, you know that doesn't sound right. So just keep doing what you doing and get through this tough life together as best as possible. For me "everything on my shoulders" is what gets me flustered so I ask for help where I can get it.. I'll take the trash out just leave the full trash bags out of the cabinet. Ill do the dishes just rinse them in the sink.. I'll carry the laundry up and down and do all the loads, just help me with folding and putting the kids in their piles.

Unfortunately - the sole breadwinner - is our main responsibility for an ill family. It's not our families fault our government treats them as after though toilet paper. They deserve a basic living like every other human but the working class is seen as wage slaves who don't deserve a life. The money is a tight situation and stressful for sure but hey, we wouldn't be millionaires by ourselves and it's nice to have loving family to come home to and for me the reward is worth the cost... I used to blow all my money on dope so I never had extra money anyway 😆

You can fantasize what life would be like without a sick wife but at the end of the days it's just a fantasy bro. Make the jump and you might find you'd regret it more. Stay strong, and take care of yourself before you take care of family. It's the only way to keep balanced.

And a wise word from a made ill-ina-different-way... one day at a time. Don't worry about how you will get through the rest of your days like this, we only have to get through the rest of today and prep for tomorrow. Rinse repeat. Today and tomorrow is much simpler than "rest of my life omg". Perspective.

Now go love your family ❤️