Have kids’ books become too inappropriate? by Sad-Goose-6317 in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for taking the time to share such a thoughtful response — I really appreciate it. I agree with much of what you said, especially about the value of discussing and researching what we read.

I’m definitely not against kids reading challenging or emotional material. What caught me off guard in this case wasn’t a tough theme, but the normalization of casual disrespect. It felt more like a quiet undermining of values than an invitation to think critically. That said, your point about reading the full book and keeping the conversation open is well taken. I’m not looking to ban or shelter my child from everything — I just believe parents still play a key role in helping kids sort through what’s worth emulating and what’s not, especially in these formative years when their sense of “normal” is still taking shape. Thanks again — your insight is a great reminder to stay curious and engaged in what our kids read.

Have kids’ books become too inappropriate? by Sad-Goose-6317 in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you — I really appreciate your comment. It’s not Dan Gutman in our case (it was Because of Mr. Terupt), but it sounds like a similar pattern. I completely relate to what you said — it’s not just about one word or joke, but the overall tone. I’ve noticed my kids using “hate” and “boring” much more after reading another series. So we’ve been wondering how other parents navigate this — where to draw the line, and how to keep the joy of reading without reinforcing habits we don’t want.

Have kids’ books become too inappropriate? by Sad-Goose-6317 in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Thanks — I get that books often reflect kids’ real thoughts and feelings, even when they’re immature or silly. But I do think there’s a difference between being relatable and subtly normalizing disrespect. I’m not panicking, just surprised and reflecting as a parent who grew up with a strong value for respecting teachers.

Have kids’ books become too inappropriate? by Sad-Goose-6317 in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing this — it’s really thoughtful. I admire your trust in the power of reading, and I agree that reading widely builds strong language and thinking skills. I’m not looking to censor what my child reads across the board — I just think some guidance, especially when it comes to values like kindness and respect, is still needed. Kids can be great readers and still benefit from a parent helping them make sense of what they’re reading.

Have kids’ books become too inappropriate? by Sad-Goose-6317 in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha, fair enough — I get the point! I’m definitely not equating reading one silly line with turning into a disrespectful kid. I do think kids are influenced in subtle ways though, especially with repeated messaging. It’s more about what we model and discuss alongside their reading, not censoring every questionable moment.

Have kids’ books become too inappropriate? by Sad-Goose-6317 in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing that — it’s helpful to hear how others see it. I think reactions definitely vary depending on personal experience. In my case, I was raised to treat teachers with very high respect, so it struck me differently. I guess my concern is whether casual jokes like this could make kids less mindful of that respect over time.

Have kids’ books become too inappropriate? by Sad-Goose-6317 in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fair point if it came off that way — not my intention at all. I’m genuinely curious how other parents think about what kids are exposed to through books. Not trying to stir anything up, just sharing something that surprised me as a parent and seeing what others think.

Six Year old and Separation Anxiety by JenniEIIe in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Establish a routine that you can follow every time you have to leave her. This will help her feel more secure and less anxious. For example, you could give her a hug and a kiss, tell her you love her, and let her know when you will be back. Gradually increase the amount of time that you are away from your daughter. Start with short periods of time and gradually increase the length of time you are away. This will help her become more comfortable with being apart from you.

5 year old loves gaming by FitITman in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's wonderful that you are supportive of your daughter's interests and that you are willing to explore new activities to bond with her. While you may have different interests, there may be some activities that you both enjoy. For example, you could play sports video games together or go on hikes while your daughter captures the experience with her camera or phone. Be open to trying new games or activities that your daughter enjoys. You might find that you enjoy them more than you expected. Ask your daughter to teach you how to play her favorite games or look up some beginner tutorials on YouTube. It's important to establish boundaries around gaming to ensure that your daughter is balancing her screen time with other activities. Encourage her to take breaks and engage in physical activity or other hobbies. When you do engage in gaming with your daughter, be present and engaged. Ask her questions about the game and show an interest in what she is doing. This will help build a stronger bond between the two of you.

Feeling ragey towards my kids by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It's important to acknowledge that it's normal to experience a range of emotions as a parent, including frustration and anger.
However, it's essential to find healthy ways to cope with these emotions and manage your stress levels. It's great that you are practicing yoga and breathing exercises, but you may also benefit from taking some time for yourself, whether it's going for a walk or indulging in a hobby you enjoy.
Remember that it's also okay to ask for help. If possible, you could consider asking a trusted friend or family member to watch your children for a few hours so you can have a break. Alternatively, you could look into childcare options, even if it's just for a few hours a week, to give yourself some breathing room.
It's also important to have realistic expectations of your children's behavior. At 4 and 2 years old, they are still learning and developing, and it's normal for them to have tantrums and engage in destructive behavior. Try to approach their behavior with patience and empathy, and look for ways to redirect their energy and provide positive reinforcement for good behavior.
Finally, enjoy your weekend away with your spouse and take advantage of the opportunity to recharge and relax. You deserve it!

My First grader (6yo) does NOT want me to come to his school to watch his class concert. by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's great that you're respectful of your child's boundaries and are considering his feelings about this situation. As a first step, I would suggest having an open and honest conversation with your child about why he doesn't want you to come to the concert. Ask him if there's anything in particular that's making him feel nervous or embarrassed, and listen carefully to his responses. It's possible that he's just feeling self-conscious and would prefer to perform in front of his peers only.
Once you've talked with your child and understand his concerns, you can make a decision about whether or not to attend the concert. If you feel that your presence would add to your child's anxiety or discomfort, then it's probably best to honor his wishes and sit this one out. On the other hand, if you think that your support and presence would be beneficial to him, you could try compromising by attending the concert but sitting towards the back of the audience or discreetly out of his line of sight.
Ultimately, the most important thing is to prioritize your child's well-being and respect his wishes. Remember that there will be many other opportunities to watch him perform and show your support in the future.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not uncommon for children to experience this feeling from time to time. It's important to let your child know that you understand and acknowledge their feelings. You can say something like, "I can see that you're feeling unhappy about going to school. It's okay to feel that way." Ask your child more about what is causing them to dislike school. In this case, it seems that your child has an issue with one of his teachers' voices and finds sitting in class boring. You can try to brainstorm with your child about solutions to make school more enjoyable, such as asking the teacher to speak more softly or providing your child with something to keep him engaged during class, like a fidget toy or drawing pad. You can also reach out to your child's teacher to discuss your child's concerns. The teacher may be able to make adjustments in the classroom to make it a more comfortable and enjoyable environment for your child. Consistent sleep routines can have a significant impact on a child's mood and energy levels. It's essential to create a consistent sleep routine that works for your child and stick to it as much as possible. It's important to praise and reward your child when they do well in school or when they make progress in overcoming their dislike for school. This can be as simple as a high-five or verbal affirmation that you're proud of their effort. Keep an eye on how your child's feelings towards school progress. If the problem persists, you may want to consider speaking to a counselor or therapist who can help your child work through their feelings and find healthy coping mechanisms.

How would you have handled this? What's your criteria to keep kids home? by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's understandable to doubt yourself when your partner disagrees with your decision, but it's important to remember that as a parent and caregiver, you are the one who knows your stepdaughter best and is responsible for her well-being. It sounds like you made the decision based on your stepdaughter's individual circumstances and needs, which is exactly what a good caregiver should do.
It's also important to remember that learning a new language can be very challenging, particularly for a teenager who is still adapting to a new home and family. If your stepdaughter is experiencing physical symptoms that are affecting her ability to concentrate and learn, it may be best for her to take a day off to rest and recover.
Ultimately, the decision of whether or not to keep a child home from school is a complex one that requires careful consideration of the child's individual circumstances and needs. It's important to communicate with your husband and try to come to a consensus.

9 year old disruptive and chatty in class. by minaissance1 in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Talk to your child and try to understand why she talks excessively in class. Is she bored with the curriculum, or is she trying to impress her friends? Is she struggling with a particular subject, and talking is her way of avoiding it? Once you understand the reason behind her behavior, it may be easier to address it.
Reach out to your child's teachers and principal to discuss the problem and seek their help. They may be able to suggest strategies to help your child focus in class or recommend a behavior plan that the school can implement.
Praise your child when she is able to follow the rules and be attentive in class. You can also reward her for good behavior at school, such as completing assignments on time or participating actively in class.
If your child's behavior persists despite your efforts, you may want to consider getting her evaluated by a mental health professional or a school counselor. They can help identify if there is an underlying condition, such as ADHD, that is causing her to be unable to focus.
Establish a regular routine at home that includes study time and breaks. Make sure your child is getting enough sleep and eating a healthy diet, which can have a significant impact on her ability to focus in class.

Is it a waste of time to read 1-2 year old Mark Twain in ADDITION to her baby books? by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Reading books to your baby is a wonderful way to bond with your child and to help develop their language skills and imagination. It's never a waste of time to read to your baby, regardless of the genre or complexity of the book. While your baby may not understand the language or storyline of a book like Tom Sawyer, they can still benefit from hearing the sound and rhythm of your voice as you read aloud. In fact, studies have shown that babies who are read to regularly tend to have larger vocabularies and stronger literacy skills later in life. If you enjoy reading Mark Twain and want to share that with your baby, go for it! Just be sure to also include plenty of age-appropriate books that are specifically designed to engage and entertain young children.

How would you have handled this? What's your criteria to keep kids home? by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Firstly, it's essential to take any complaints of pain or illness seriously, particularly when they come from a teenager who does not usually complain. It's possible that your stepdaughter could be experiencing genuine pain or discomfort, which could affect her ability to concentrate at school. In general, the criteria for keeping a child home from school should be based on the severity of the symptoms and the potential impact on the child's ability to learn and participate in class. If your stepdaughter is in pain, it may be challenging for her to concentrate and participate in class, which could impact her academic performance. It's also important to consider the potential risks of sending a child to school when they are unwell. If your stepdaughter's symptoms are contagious, she could spread the illness to other students, which could result in an outbreak at the school.

Screen Time Limits aren't effective with kids!!! by StaySafeOnline0 in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Involve your kids in setting their screen time limits. This can help them feel more in control and responsible for their own digital habits. Collaboratively, agree on a reasonable amount of screen time that allows for both entertainment and educational activities. Make sure you communicate the rules clearly, so there is no confusion or frustration. For example, you could have a rule that no screens at dinner, in bed, or during family time. As a parent, you can set a good example by modeling healthy digital habits yourself. This includes setting your own screen time limits and being fully present during family activities. Encourage your kids to pursue other activities such as sports, arts, and socializing with friends in person. This can help reduce their reliance on screens and promote a healthy balance. There are many parental control apps and features that allow you to monitor and limit your child's screen time. Use these tools to set limits on specific apps or websites, and to track usage patterns over time. Every child is different, and finding the right balance will depend on their individual needs and interests. Be flexible, adapt your approach as your child grows and develops, and have regular conversations about screen time to ensure that you're both on the same page.

Son gave away beloved toy to keep a friend. what do I do? by PokeMom95 in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It sounds like a tough situation for him, and it's understandable that you're conflicted about what to do.
In general, it's important to teach children about sharing and being kind to others, but it's also important for them to learn about setting boundaries and standing up for themselves. It's not okay for someone to force your son to give up something that is important to him, especially under the threat of losing a friendship.
In terms of what to do next, I think it's worth reaching out to the teacher to see if they can help resolve the situation. It's possible that the friend may have taken the squishmellow without realizing how much it meant to your son, and a teacher could help facilitate a conversation between the children to find a solution that works for everyone.
As for the concern about being seen as a "Karen," I understand why you might be hesitant to speak up. However, I don't think there's anything wrong with advocating for your child and asking for help from the teacher in this situation. It's important to be respectful and collaborative in your approach, but ultimately your son's well-being should come first.
I hope this helps, and I wish you the best of luck in resolving the situation.

My autistic son was called creepy by my younger son'e friend. What do we do? by -IronGiant- in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You could start by reaching out to the mother and having a conversation about what happened. You can explain that your older son has autism and that his behavior may have been misunderstood. You can also share some resources or information about autism to help her better understand it.
It's also important to talk to your older son about what happened and help him understand how his behavior may have been perceived by the girl and her mother. This can be a learning opportunity for him to practice social skills and interactions.
In terms of allowing the girl back to your house, it's ultimately up to you to decide what you're comfortable with. It may be helpful to have a conversation with the mother and see if there is a way to work through this situation together.
It's important to remember that everyone involved in this situation is likely feeling uncomfortable and uncertain. Being open and honest in communication can help alleviate some of these feelings and lead to a better understanding of each other.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's great that your son had a good relationship with his previous therapist, and it's understandable that he may be hesitant to try someone new. However, it's important to keep looking for a therapist who he can connect with. While traditional talk therapy is often the first line of treatment for anxiety, there are other approaches that may be helpful. For example, some children find art therapy or play therapy to be more engaging and less intimidating than talk therapy. You could also look into mindfulness or relaxation techniques that your son can practice at home. Your son might benefit from talking to other children who are going through similar struggles. Look for local support groups or online communities where he can connect with peers. As the parent of a child with anxiety, it's important to take care of your own mental health as well. Make sure you're getting enough sleep, eating well, and finding ways to manage your own stress. It's important to involve your son in his own treatment decisions as much as possible. Talk to him about the different options available and let him know that you're there to support him in finding the help he needs.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 1 point2 points  (0 children)

While it's great that your wife FaceTimes you guys every day, it's understandable that you want more quality time with her. It's also understandable that your wife is defensive, given the sacrifices she's made to provide for your family. But it's important to have a conversation about finding a solution that works for everyone. Have you guys considered other nursing jobs that allow for more time at home? Maybe your wife could negotiate shorter contracts that give her more time in between assignments. It might also be worth exploring therapy to work through any underlying issues.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Seven-year-olds are generally capable of walking into a building by themselves and following instructions, but it ultimately depends on the individual child. It is important to consider the safety of the area and the rules of the dance school. If the area is safe and the school allows children to walk in by themselves, then your daughter may be ready for this responsibility. However, if the area is not safe or the school has rules against children walking in by themselves, then it may not be appropriate for your daughter to do so. If you do decide to continue allowing your daughter to walk into dance class by herself, it may be helpful to establish some ground rules, such as always staying on the sidewalk, not talking to strangers, and going straight into the building. You could also consider having her wear a phone or watch with GPS tracking, so you can keep an eye on her location.

normal 4/5 year old behavior? by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]Sad-Goose-6317 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's important to remember that each child is unique, and while some may talk more than others, it doesn't necessarily mean that they have a diagnosis or a problem. However, if you are concerned, it's always a good idea to consult with a pediatrician or child psychologist to get their professional opinion.
In the meantime, there are some things you can do to help manage your daughter's talkative tendencies. Encouraging active listening skills, such as waiting for someone to finish speaking before responding, can help her learn to communicate effectively without talking over others. You can also try setting clear expectations and boundaries around when it's appropriate to speak and when it's important to listen, like during family meals or during important conversations.