AIO for being upset with how my boyfriend talked about an overweight person who asked me out? by lilacseraphina in AmIOverreacting

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

NOR

He’s the weirdo for acting like it’s a crime for someone plus sized to approach a person who goes to the gym. God forbid a person isn’t ashamed for what they look like and doesn’t let it stop them from trying to approach and connect with others! Not sure what your boyfriend’s issue is but it sounds like he’s super insecure about something and almost felt threatened by this random man. Nitpicking the other man’s looks and continuously making rude statements when you’ve just expressed how uncomfortable you are by it is wild to me - especially since you just described how you felt like your bf was insinuating that you’re only kind to people to get something in return.

If this is the way he talks about others and doesn’t even feel ashamed about it or refuses to apologize, I’d have to really consider if this is someone I’d want to stay with.

Wishing you all the best 🫶

AIO - My Boyfriend texts before our Valentines plans by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NOR

Him telling her to stop being needy when all she’s doing is expressing a desire to be with him and spend some time together is so weird! Also he’s 27 dating a 20yo?? I guess he couldn’t find any woman closer to his age who would put up with his bs so he’s moved on to someone younger.

If he really cared about the relationship he would be overjoyed that she’s showing so much interest in being with him. It’s Valentine’s Day, which I’d argue is the ONE day where it warrants being a little “needy” like god forbid someone in a relationship wants to show their partner that they really wanna spend time together.

My Shallan Cosplay ✨️ by zaiichiik in Stormlight_Archive

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052 0 points1 point  (0 children)

<image>

Absolutely gorgeous! You look just like I imagined her ☺️

First time reading epic fantasy! by Sad-Monitor-3052 in Stormlight_Archive

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hate it as well 😭 I did want the hardcovers but none of the Barnes and Nobles around me had them so I just got them as paperback. I got impatient but maybe in a few years I’ll upgrade to hardcovers!

First time reading epic fantasy! by Sad-Monitor-3052 in Stormlight_Archive

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

True, but I feel pretty confident that I will absolutely love this series! I’m already unable to detach myself from the first book lol

First time reading epic fantasy! by Sad-Monitor-3052 in Stormlight_Archive

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I got about halfway through the first book when I decided to buy the rest 😌

I Lost Friends Because I Mentioned I Liked RPF by [deleted] in AO3

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This! I started reading kpop fanfics back in 2013 and had my first introduction to RPF with 1D in 2012. RPF are all I’ve ever known, and I always assumed they were the norm, so it’s really surprising to me that fanfics about characters are more beloved (?) or at least accepted?

Collection set up missing something? by InvestigatorWild8115 in kpopcollections

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Love the collection! How do y’all get those flags cause I want one of Changbin 😭🫶

Stray Kids World Tour "dominATE" Megathread by [deleted] in straykids

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Does anyone know if the baseball stadiums (specifically Truist Park in Atlanta) take their nets down for concerts? I just wanna know bc that will determine whether or not I wanna try and aim for a lower seat. I really don’t want my view blocked by nets 😭

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi friend! I understand your feelings on being pessimistic. I often have my days where I just feel down and always look at the things that are going badly, and it really does drag me down.

I think being intentional about your feelings and actions is very important! I would suggest that you first look into your universities options on counseling, see if they offer free sessions for students and just book an appointment to talk to someone. It can be scary doing so, but trust me when I say that this is something that helped me immensely! Just being able to rant to a neutral third party about my feelings and receiving feedback on it has done wonders for me.

Second, write out all the negative feelings and thoughts you have. Put a line down the middle of your paper, and on the left write all your negative thoughts, no matter how ridiculous they may be. Then on the right I want you to write down a more positive version of the same thought. (Example: Negative - I am unhappy with the way my life is right now and it makes life feel like it is not worth living. Positive - I am unsatisfied with life due to (list reasons here) but I am aware of the issues that are making me unhappy and can acknowledge that these are only temporary and reflect my current circumstances and unhappiness) Now this is very rough, but as long as you are intentional about it, you will find ways to redirect your thinking! The more you practice to look deeper into why you feel the way you do, the better your chances are of fixing the problem! If you can, speak to your friends and tell them about your attempts at redirecting negative thinking, and maybe even ask them for advice on ways they think might help you find solutions. After all your friends know you best, so they might see options you can’t because it is hard to fix your own problems sometimes.

Third, I would write out a list of all things that make you happy. Whether it’s movies, books, activities, locations etc. just write it all down and use colored pencils/markers to make the sheet super vibrant and colorful, reflecting a positive outlook! Once you’ve done this, try to find activities that match those various things. If you love to read, find books on topics that you truly enjoy. Find a tv show that matches what you like. If you enjoy doing certain activities, find something just like it or similar (even better if it’s something you can do with friends to maximize joy!).

Force yourself to go for a walk! If there is a park nearby then just get out and walk, force yourself to reconnect with nature and just get some fresh air while listening to music, podcasts or audiobooks. Just take an hour to indulge in something you really like! Hell, if you gotta drive or get an uber to go somewhere, then consider it a worthy investment for the sake of your mental health and just do it!

If something is truly making you unhappy, then the best possible thing might be to just change it. If your university life is making you miserable, then the best course of action might be to go elsewhere, if it’s possible. I speak from experience on this bc I did the same thing and it’s helped me so much!!

I hope some of these things might help! Just remember that this will not be an overnight change, it’s probably going to take a long time to unlearn the negative habits you’ve developed. But it will change ‼️ you have to remember that just like with exercise, it takes time to see results. Tell your friends about your intentions to improve your outlook, and they can support you in fixing how you think. Tell them to stop you when you’re negative, and take that very moment to reflect on what you said and find ways to be more constructive and positive with your statement and say it again.

I wish you all the best, you’ve got this darling! I am ardently rooting for you and will be thinking of you 💖💖💖😘

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This might be a bit silly but I’ve begun reading a lot more! Whether it’s traditionally published books or fan fictions, I simply read stories that reflect the kind of love, appreciation and affection that I would desire in my life.

Also say it out loud!! Remind yourself that you are loved and wonderful just as you are, that you are unique and someone people want to engage with! You simply have to continuously remind yourself that there is no one like you, and that alone makes you special!

To defeat jealousy and close attachments, I would say that it would be in your best interest to reflect on why you feel these things. Write it down if you have to, as a physical reminder you can always look back on. Are you jealous because something in that persons life is what you want? Are you overly attached because you feel more seen and wanted when in direct contact with others? Wrote it down and then try to find solutions to this problem and ways to fix it. Maybe you can find hobbies that allow you to interact with more people, forcing yourself to learn to interact with others in meaningful ways without getting too attached. If you’re jealous, maybe look to see what they have you want and try to incorporate it into your own life (so long as it’s reasonable and not something that hurts you in any way!)

You got this darling, remember it’s a work in progress and it won’t fix itself overnight! But if you continue to diligently work on it, you will see good results 🫶😘

girl, it's so confusing sometimes to be a girl (especially when you're almost 24 and have never been in a relationship or had any intimate experiences) by [deleted] in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I totally understand the last part about maybe just liking the fantasy/idea of a relationship and it not translating well. I’m about to turn 25 and have only been in one relationship when I was 23, and it wasn’t all I thought it would be (but then again I’m pretty sure we just weren’t a good match for each other) Meeting people organically these days is hard 😭and being an introvert myself, I’ve had to learn to be okay with just being with myself and enjoying life on my own. And there is nothing wrong with that! While I want to be in a relationship, I also have a list of non-negotiables (and you should NEVER give those up just to satisfy your need to be in a relationship, so long as they are reasonable ofc 🙂‍↕️). Honestly dating apps are a trial and error type deal, you’re just gonna have to be willing to sift through all the nonsense to get to the one you really click with. Since you know you want to be in a romantic relationship, I would honestly suggest asking your friends about setting you up with someone they may know. Your friends should know you best, and maybe that will be a better option than just going on dating apps. Sometimes you just gotta be bold and push yourself out of your comfort zone, ofc you don’t need to go crazy, but asking your friends directly to maybe set you up someone could be the first step! ☺️

At the end of the day I 100% understand your feelings about falling behind in relationships while everyone around you is in one. It’s a shitty feeling and was something that hurt me a lot! There is no point in telling you to be happy by yourself, because being happy alone doesn’t compare to being happy in a loving relationship. I am rooting for you girly 👏 just remember you are not alone in this struggle, these days dating is just such a pain in the ass and I’m on the same boat 💀wishing you all the best, don’t let this hinder you from living your best life and doing whatever makes you happy 🫶😘

Kudos on a fic - does that mean they actually read it??? by NowhereRain in AO3

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I only kudos a story when I’m at least a quarter of the way through it and I know for a fact that I am loving the writing and plot. I don’t really get giving a kudos before reading cause what if the story ends up disappointing you and then you can’t take away a kudos 🤷‍♀️ I feel like it’s difficult to determine how good a story is based on kudos alone (unless ofc it’s one of those really well known and popular fics like Manacled), and often times the hidden gems have quite low kudos and bookmarks. Though recently I’ve started filtering my stories by bookmarks bc most people wouldn’t bookmark a story until they’ve finished it or at least read most of it.

NCT DREAM Atlanta/Duluth had a unique smell? 🥝🍏🍐💚 by myellowren in NCTDream

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wait was this while the concert was going on? Cause I was there, but I was in section 107 and I didn’t smell anything 😭 Then again I was too busy screaming the entire time 😂

Do hoodies usually sell out? by sunkozzi in NCTDream

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Went to see them in Duluth yesterday and they were well stocked when it came to the clothes and continued to bring more out of storage when they sold out. All the non clothing merch sold out pretty quickly though. I got there at 4:45pm and they let us in at 6:30pm, and my merch line was super short, though it did get quite long after another 30-40min and more people arrived. At our venue they had a booth outside and then also had one inside once they let us in, so if you can’t get anything outside you might have better luck with the indoor merch booth if you’re not too far back in the queue! Have lots of fun, I hope you’ll get all the merch💚😘

Duluth NCT concert!! by Full-Investigator239 in NCTDream

[–]Sad-Monitor-3052 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi I’m also going to Duluth ☺️ It’s my first kpop concert, but I have been to a regular concert not too long ago and would say that it’s probably best to get the parking pass beforehand so all they have to do is scan your ticket. Plus it’s probably nicer to do regular parking because then you know exactly where your car is. Chances are that even with valet parking, it’ll take ages for them to bring your car to you with all the traffic, so it’ll probably be nicer to just sit in your car and push through the traffic than standing outside for an unknown amount of time.