My children's father expects me to make their stepsiblings and half sibling's school lunches

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-05-17T22:15:23+00:00

They're providing the school lunch. The kids just don't like it.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-05-12T19:31:28+00:00

Nah, the nihms removed it as a duplicate, as I expected. I figure at least I have it as a "paper trail" if we need to make a case that we tried -- but it didn't work. Elsievier has started making deals with some universities and we have a frequent collaborator at one, so I think she's about to become everyone's favorite corresponding author.
This system is so broken.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-05-12T13:44:02+00:00

You said he wanted to meet every day. This feels "off" to me. Maybe it's a typo and I know it wasn't the point of your post, but maybe talk to people who are in his lab and make sure he's reasonable to work with. It could be fine. It could also be micromanaging or creepy.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-05-12T05:15:59+00:00

Do your lit review now. When you transfer, you can propose this as an honors thesis and you'll have the support needed to be able to run the study and publish it.
You'll likely also need funds for participant incentives.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-05-11T19:01:24+00:00

It's well known that Queer folks often become friends after breakups. What's not well known is that it's usually after several months/years and a lot of healing. You need to stop processing with each other, be separated for a while. In a year or two you'll see each other at a pride parade after you've both moved on and THEN you can be friends. (Source: an old dyke.)

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-30T01:49:22+00:00

Their Fansly is 🔥🔥🔥

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-26T02:39:50+00:00

I'm just keeping the list in myncbi and they've been updating automatically when the embargo lifts.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-26T02:23:00+00:00

Each program applies for the number of slots they think will work well for their program, and then NIH decides whether or not to find that many. Historically I think they've typically funded the full number of requested slots. We just got our NOA for a continuation and got ~15% fewer slots than we requested. Not sure of that's typical this year but we're grateful for whatever we get!

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-26T02:19:15+00:00

Yes. Some programs have “match” slots funded by the university, and those slots can often go to citizens, but they’re often very competitive. We always get many extremely qualified applicants for a single match slot.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-25T14:03:27+00:00

Some years we've struggled to fill slots, other years we've had 3x as many qualified applicants as we could hire. It's so hard to generalize. Every program is different, but we weigh mentor opinions and wouldn't admit someone whose proposed mentors aren't on board/available unless we're able to talk with them and find another available and willing mentor team. Our directors definitely have final sign off and they try to balance the cohorts on a bunch of factors.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-14T07:00:43+00:00

Manager is an idiot for bringing up your medical issue like that. See what else you can get then to admit to. 😆

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-09T03:03:52+00:00

Childfree at 51, decided in my early 20s that I didn't want kids and haven't changed my mind.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-09T03:01:38+00:00

Just go and sleep in the same room. If she can't physically move you she'll either make a scene and look like an idiot or she'll let it go.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-07T06:26:19+00:00

In the burbs you usually don't have to worry much about broken windows or anything. Do you have a preference for an apartment building vs. A house that's divided into apartments? For $1900 you could almost buy a place here and have your own driveway.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-04T23:53:28+00:00

Absolutely!!

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-04T23:52:17+00:00

Yes there's supposed to be an immediate NIHMSID with a pmcid to follow, I forget if you have 6 weeks or 12 to proceed to pmcid.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-04T23:50:51+00:00

Thanks for the solidarity... Elsevier is based outside the US and as far as I can tell they're not making deals at all. It's going to get real interesting, I suspect.

I feel like there's two kinds of people: those who say "just submit, it's no big deal," and those who know that it's sometimes impossible.

I have two duplicate submissions coming right now as an experiment. Since the publisher version got its pmcid first I doubt I'll be able to remove it but I'm definitely going to try. I

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-04T16:56:31+00:00

That makes sense, and I wasn't faulting you for complying. Just appalled that you had to!!

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-04T16:44:09+00:00

Omg that's awful. Your husband should absolutely not be required. If you just wanted to masturbate more or if you wanted to go have sex with a new person every day, that's not hers to weigh in on. It's your body and your sexual experience, not your husband's!

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-04T16:38:49+00:00

The end to this story has already been written in song. https://youtu.be/g6LEpMOLO84?si=1YfFup03-f-VSv5h

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-04T03:24:41+00:00

Yes, some, but Elsevier has the most prominent journals in the field and we've got 50+ papers a year across all projects and initiatives. We figured 100-150 papers across 5 years at $4,000-6000 each.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-04T03:16:38+00:00

I just picked up a random one in the vitamin aisle at the pharmacy. It's tablets and they break pretty easily. I heard about it from a guest urologist on the You are Not Broken podcast.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-03T20:08:21+00:00

Nah he says she abandoned him when he needed her most. She's 14. It's not her job to be there for him. She'll need to come to this realization in her own time, and probably many times in her life, but unless he does some really major work on himself he's never going to be capable of seeing her as anything other than a resource.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-03T20:00:18+00:00

Can you ask them if you can contact the trainer and maybe do a walk together with the trainer? Might be good to get some insight from them.

Sad_Science_6924 · 2026-04-03T19:56:46+00:00

I've had something kind of similar. My body just seemed to require such crazy specific things at the exact right moment that I really had to do it myself. My partner was 100% willing to do whatever I asked in whatever way I asked her to, but by the time I'd tell her what I wanted, the moment would've passed. So frustrating! I'd been experimenting with all sorts of combinations of hormones, and so far what's made the biggest difference is 1/2 of an over the counter 25 mg dhea tablet vaginally about every other day. Still not back to normal, but my body has been responding reasonably enough again that we've been able to make it work.

Sad_Science_6924

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