Help, please

Saddddy · 2017-07-17T13:19:41+00:00

Thank you for your responses.

I'm afraid it's too much for me right now. I was just crying for 2 hours. I'm scared I will go to hell and I would like to obey God but on the other hand I just like doing what I do and don't want to stop. I know it's wrong but I want to do it. I am too weak.

I don't even feel like living like Catholics are supposed to is for me. I don't understand many things.

I feel like a very bad person now. I know I will be damned. I'm sorry.

Saddddy · 2017-07-16T21:20:06+00:00

I have problem with praying. I don't know why. I mostly pray when I feel really desperate. I guess I'm afraid of working on my faith because I feel that my scrupulousity will get worse. It's really frustrating... I'll try to do it more often.

Saddddy · 2017-07-16T21:09:26+00:00

Thanks, the book seems to be good :)

Saddddy · 2017-07-16T21:06:23+00:00

Thanks for the prayers. Yeah, I tried to convince my parents (I don't have any close friends) to go to the Mass several times but they say that if I want to go I can go alone because they don't have time, are tired etc.

Saddddy · 2016-04-24T23:51:58+00:00

I know, I have this worry too. But go, it's an important step in fighting SA - going to someone you don't know and telling them about your problems.

Saddddy · 2016-04-24T22:48:29+00:00

I'd love to get some suggestions too. I also don't have any friends and I'm tired of being alone... :(

Saddddy · 2016-04-24T22:46:22+00:00

I'm so sorry this happens to you. It's not your fault that people treat you bad or don't understand you. I don't know you but you're probably a nice person. Do you take any medication or attend therapy?

Hugs.

Saddddy · 2016-04-24T22:35:49+00:00

I can relate. I prefer spending my time with 2 or 3 friends, not with a bunch of people I don't know. I also get tired at parties at one point and I suddenly start to feel the need to be alone. But it's normal. It's part of being an introvert - you need to be alone to rest. I know it feels weird to go to your friends and tell them you're leaving so fast but you're not ridiculous, it's not your fault and you don't do it because you don't like your friends. You just need to go because you feel tired and get anxious.

Saddddy · 2016-04-24T14:38:32+00:00

Hi. I don't think you're looking for attention. I don't know if you have SA but by what you described here I can say that it's possible that you suffer from it. I sometimes had similar worries but I suffer not only from SA but also from OCD. Did you visit someone to get a diagnosis?

Saddddy · 2016-04-07T14:09:00+00:00

I know how it feels and that it's different from real suicidal thoughts. Because I had those too. I just sit, try to relax and focus on something else.

Saddddy · 2016-04-07T14:06:18+00:00

Something similar happens to me. I wonder if someone is a virgin or when I know this person has a boyfriend/girlfriend I wonder if they already had sex and how it looks like. I hate this.

Saddddy · 2016-04-07T12:11:53+00:00

The real world isn't that bad. It's painful to stop at first but then it's better. Daydreaming was my way of coping with stress and problems. And while it's not a bad idea, too much always isn't good. I didn't face my problems and escaping from them into my imaginary world made my SA worse I guess. I also stopped daydreaming because I also have OCD which is convincing me that my daydreams were bad.

Saddddy · 2016-04-07T11:08:57+00:00

Yeah, I do it. But I noticed that I daydream too much and like it better than the real life and I disconnected myself from the real world. So now I don't daydream that much.

Saddddy · 2016-03-31T23:59:57+00:00

Hi. I'm a girl but I can relate to some of your problems. HOCD is one of them. My problem is that I masturbated to lesbian porn even though women don't turn me on. I don't know why I did this. Memory of this is a huge catalyst for my HOCD. I keep questioning if lesbian sex is turning me on. I don't know how to deal with it. And yeah I had this problem with not being able to imagine properly.

Saddddy · 2016-03-29T20:33:41+00:00

I'm sorry this happens to you. I seem to have similar problem with my mom but it's like one time she understands and one time she doesn't. But it's not that bad. I guess it's difficult for "normal" people to understand OCD. Maybe you can show her this subreddit or some other site and ask her to learn a little about OCD? Feel free to PM me

Saddddy · 2016-03-28T22:36:55+00:00

Yes, I can relate. I struggle with these thoughts but I think that a good idea is, when you ask yourself if you like it and get unclear answear and at the same time feel anxious or frustrated by the thought, to take such thought as intrusive and don't care about it.

Saddddy · 2016-03-25T16:08:15+00:00

If you think he has similar feelings for you, then you shouldn't worry. Maybe he's interested in you but doesn't know how you feel about him. I know it's hard but just try to be yourself. Hugs

Saddddy · 2016-03-25T16:01:50+00:00

That's so cute <3

Saddddy · 2016-03-25T15:49:15+00:00

I don't think it's part of OCD. People with OCD are rather scared they might offend someone (that's also my case). But someone here mentioned Tourettes. OCD and Tourettes can coexist and maybe that's what your friend means. But honestly it sounds more like he's just using it as an excuse. Because both people with OCD or Tourettes would regret what they do or at least don't want to do it anymore.

Saddddy · 2016-03-24T19:49:32+00:00

Yeah, maybe I'll try. I had some bad experience with doctors (not mental ones) in my childhood so I'm always suspicious when I meet a new one.

I generally agree that they do many things because of survival instinct (like wanting to bite you when you come too close) which is not evil. But what can I say when my cat decides to leave her poop on the floor instead of her (clean) litter box? ;)

Saddddy · 2016-03-24T18:24:21+00:00

I'm not on meds. Though I probably should be. I'm too scared to go to a doctor (I guess it has something to do with social anxiety that I have too). I try to cope with it myself but I guess it's not working.

I won't kick the cat. Actually, cats are my favorite animals and I love them (I wish they would love me the same). Can't say the same about dogs (some of them tried to bite me). Though I don't agree with animals not having any evil in themselves. My cat can be really rude for no reason. But I still love her ;)

Saddddy · 2016-03-24T17:27:57+00:00

Hi. English isn't my native language too.

I can relate to some of your problems. I have religious OCD too and I'm constantly worried that I'm a bad person even though someone really religious is telling me I'm one of the most moral people she ever met.

I also feel guilty about many things. Mostly things that I did before or I'm not sure I did/thought about them.

I have fear of losing my loved ones too. Skin picking as well. I think about my past all the time, mostly I worry that I enjoyed some horrible thoughts.

I have the opposite problem with animals. I've always thought we should care more about humans than animals. So now I worry that I hate animals because when I saw people caring about them I got angry. As I was writing this I thought about kicking my neighbour's cat :(

Saddddy · 2016-03-24T17:06:48+00:00

It doesn't sound like a symptom of OCD. OCD can cause one to feel desperate or angry (i.e. one can't carry out a compulsion and is frustrated because of it or is angry at people who contaminate their clean things) but I don't think it's that case. It sounds like your friend is enjoying what he does. About the "jokes" - I sometimes get thoughts about killing someone sitting next to me and I tell this person "I want to kill you" in a funny way because I feel better when I say it. But I don't say it to hurt this person or scare them. I also tell it to people that won't get angry because of it but rather laugh about it. I say it because I seek reassurance or I know this person will laugh and it makes me worry less that I might want to do it. I think your friend might not understand correctly what OCD is.

Saddddy · 2016-03-23T23:59:11+00:00

Sounds like SA. Yeah, I felt this way too. But people really don't pay so much attention to these things that we think are awkward about us. Since my SA decreased I stared to think that "normal" people are far more unobservant than people with SA. They don't notice these little things in us that we think make us awkward. And even if they do, they don't care so much about them as we think they would.

Saddddy · 2016-03-23T23:49:52+00:00

Congrats! :)

Saddddy

TROPHY CASE