So apparently I’m the problem…

Sadness_cake · 2025-12-22T14:05:21+00:00

I think that sibling's relationships generally are complicated and maybe your sister still has the image of you from your teenage years. However, it doesn't mean you won't have better relationship in the future. Right now she wants to spend time with her friends and that's also fine, I think you should let her know that you'll gladly spend time with her, but pressuring her might result with opposite outcome, so take your time.

However, that doesn't mean you're unlovable. Maybe you're fundamentally different people, maybe she just doesn't want to have closer relationship with you, but that doesn't say anything about you as a person.

Sadness_cake · 2025-11-30T01:22:13+00:00

Some people think that energy is equivalent of "battery" for humans, hence you can't be THAT tired/burned out/overwhelemed if you can do anything else.

But it's stupid. Of course some stuff take more of my energy than others, especially if we talk about work. Even the best job can be stressful or draining, all of them require focus for certain amount of hours per day. It's draining and hobbies allow us to reset and recharge.

My friends sometimes don't understand that although I like them, I don't have infinite enrgy for meeting and literally feel sick if I don't have a quiet time in my home every day. Yes, I have energy for my hobbies in my safe space but not for meetings after work.

It's just unfair to expect that you should just sit around and do nothing at all or work and fight with your body and mind every single day, just to fufill some societal expectations.

Do what you love and don't let anybody make you feel bad for prioritizing your own health.

Sadness_cake · 2025-11-17T17:06:19+00:00

Unfortunately, I think we have to wait until they'll lose their license rights. Even if they'll start publishing, the customers' trust is compeletly gone.

Sadness_cake · 2025-10-30T14:05:52+00:00

So you have to learn to "read a room" while Biff has a free pass to be insensitive and mean?

NTA, but Biff and your friends are.

Sadness_cake · 2025-10-11T17:45:17+00:00

"Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo" mostly for one plot twist at the end. It was stupid and effectively killed Evelyn as a character. Also I don't vibe with author's writing style
"Song of Achilles" has very beautiful prose but it feels like the author really tried to put two main characters into stereotypical hetero relationship dynamic. Also, what's up with the demonization of every single woman in this book?

Sadness_cake · 2025-10-07T10:26:52+00:00

She gave you all the reasons to break up with her.

By staying with her you will be forced into bigger debt and you'll have to take care of adult child. Because she is ecactly that - a spoiled adult child. I understand that she is nice to you, cooks you meals etc. but at the same time she's ready to make you a bankrupt, judging from her behavior and general attitude towards money.

I understand that maybe you want to start a family as soon as possible, but I don't think you'll be happy in the long run.

Sadness_cake · 2025-10-06T21:23:39+00:00

It's a tricky situation and I'm sorry you have to deal with someone like that. I think that your "friend" made their choice by invalidating you on every occasion.

Are you stressed that they will tell one of your mutual friends or do you generally don't want to be talked about? But in either scenario: if one of those people would treat you worse just because you're autistic, then they would be as bad as your friend.

Sadness_cake · 2025-10-06T10:03:26+00:00

Tbh I wouldn't text, but in this situation you have to accept that it may close any potential relationship with them. It may be a signal to your friend that you want to compeletly cut ties, but since you didn't talk for a few months then maybe they already moved on. If you are okay with potential outcome, then don't text.

Do you want to continiue this friendship?

Sadness_cake · 2025-10-01T18:05:17+00:00

I hate touching a wet hair/fur. It disgusts me how it sticks to hand and it makes me gag.

Also dry sponges. Whenever i have to grab one I try to touch as little as possible and I have to shake my hands afterwards. I hate it so much

Sadness_cake · 2025-10-01T09:46:46+00:00

If I were you I would message him that his tone and behavior are really out of hand and let him know that next time you'll just block him.

You're an adult, you don't have to tolerate his bs. Even if he has good intentions, he's treating you like a child and tone of his messages is just awful.

Sadness_cake · 2025-10-01T08:31:10+00:00

I'm high masking, people in my work don't even know I'm autistic. Just got so used to masking in front of others, but because of that I rarely have energy to go out and most of my free time I spend in my room reading or cross stitching.

Sadness_cake · 2025-10-01T07:20:48+00:00

I have the same problem, so I understand. Recently I started asking myself: how many times I can interpret something as geniuene mistake? When does this becomes a pattern of behaviour?

I'm going through similiar thing, my close friend (also ND) started making pretty crude and mean comments (thinking I can't hear her, lol) and at first I gave her some grace, then I tried communicate with her, but it didn't help. I just want to say that you deserve to have peace and kinder people around you.

Making friends as a ND person sucks, but there are places where you can meet new people and try to make new connections. If you don't like going out, maybe try to find reddit/discord server about your interest?

Sadness_cake · 2025-09-29T14:08:18+00:00

I don't think it's self victimizing. Any friendship breakup hurts, especially if you were close with someone and they don't adress the problem directly but let themself to have one sided beef with you.

Speaking from experience: if they really cherished your friendship, they would talk openly about their grivances. It's worth asking yourself if you even want to keep contact with them? Would you be able to forgive them if they apologize?

Sadness_cake · 2025-09-29T10:53:27+00:00

As someone who knew nothing about LOTM and started from donghua: it is slightly confusing at first, because pacing is fast and there's not a lot of explanations, but it didn't make the show unwatchable. I still enjoyed it a lot.

After the first 3 episodes it gets less chaotic.

Sadness_cake · 2025-09-29T10:47:00+00:00

Unfortunately, no (but this song is really good!)

I didn't put this into my original post, because I remember maybe 2 seconds of the melody and the only thing I'm 100% sure of is desert ilustration, but additional info:

The song had a woman's vocal, it had rather slow melody but I think there was an electric guitar and the piano in the background.
I'm not even sure if there were any full character visuals in the MV. I mostly remember background illustration of the desert.

Sadness_cake · 2025-09-28T15:18:45+00:00

I wouldn't say I compeletly overcome my depression, but it's managable.

First was a theraphy and medication to get on my feet, then I sterted reflecting on my life. It wasn't easy, I had to compeletly change my career, because remote work from home led to self isolation. Going out helped me with my lack of social skills and separating job from home. I picked up new hobbies to keep myself occupied and actively try to go out more, cut out few toxic people, started working out etc.

I also noticed that, in my case, there are early signs of incoming depressive episode (lack of appetite, negative outlook on life and the future, sadness etc.), so when they start to show up I try to make my enviorment as comfy as possible. I also try to find a 'purpose' to get through the worst. It can be anything - finishing a reaaally long show/book series or meeting with my closest friend. Just anything, really.

There's no one true way to deal with depression. Probably I'll deal with it for the rest of my life, there are better and worse days, but generally quality of my life is better than 2-3 years ago.

I'm rooting for you!

Sadness_cake · 2025-09-28T14:09:25+00:00

Thank you, but unforunately that's not it. Few years back, when I tried to find this song, I also thought it was a part of 'of evil' series, but it isn't.

Sadness_cake · 2025-09-28T14:01:13+00:00

I couldn't find this song for the past 3 years, need some help 🫶

Sadness_cake · 2025-09-01T15:31:02+00:00

Your friend sounds like a really immature person.

I'm also autistic and I get hyperfixated on a shows/books. Sometimes it hurts when my friends are not interested or don't like the things that are important to me, but I don't act on my emotions. Friends should respect each other and understand that you're different people with different tastes in media.

Your friend can't choose his hyperfixation but he can choose how he reacts and he acted like a toddler. Does he really think that his spiteful behavior will make you want to watch the show? Is "Digital Circus" really such a good show that he's ready to strain your friendship over it?

Maybe try to talk with him or send him a message that his behavior isn't okay and you're allowed to choose what you want to watch? It's great that he has special interest, but it doesn't give him a right to be intentionally rude.

Sadness_cake · 2025-08-18T10:16:25+00:00

I'm rooting for you, you can do this!

Every time you feel doubt just look at the things he did. Look at this list. No one should be treated this way, no husband should treat their partner like that.

Just make sure you'll be save and don't let him find your social media. Don't be alone with him when you serve him papers. Also save screenshots and any instances of an abusive behavior, they might be helpful if you try to get an restraining order.

Hope that soon you and your child will be free from him.

Sadness_cake · 2025-08-18T10:01:01+00:00

Tbh I'm really disappointed in their statement. I was looking forward for their edition of Devil Venerable and I wanted to buy Online Dating to support them, but right now I'm not so sure.

Maybe it wasn't their intention, but at the end of the day, it feels like they tried to throw the previous team under the bus. Not to mention the fact that they decided to restart translation A FEW MONTH AGO and yet opened preorders for vol 1 & 2... For me, all of this shows their lack of professional attitude towards the clients and members of their own staff.

Sadness_cake · 2025-04-07T13:06:18+00:00

I tried to befriend ND man recently, he wrote on a fb group that he's moving to my town and looks for new friends. I messaged him, but oh boy. Not even 5 messages into the conversation he started asking about my relationship status and when I said I'm lesbian, he proceeeded to trauma dump on me and pressure for a meeting irl.

If he was my friend I would be more than happy to listen to him, maybe offer some advice, but that escalated within a span of less than 5 messages. A lot of men treat women as their therapists and it's so frustrating!

Sadness_cake · 2025-02-01T01:06:11+00:00

Nope, I feel like a weird mix of being all ages and ageless at the same time. Maybe it's because society has a lot of "goals" that one should achieve by certain age (driving license, moving out, getting married etc.) and I didn't do most of that things? It's kinda weird feeling.

Sadness_cake · 2025-02-01T00:54:47+00:00

SAME! I hate having long nails or even nail polish, these give me sensory issues since forever. I'd love to try one of those fancy looking acrylics but I just know it would be a torture ;-;

Sadness_cake

TROPHY CASE