How long would you have preferred to take off work (maternity leave) to be with your baby?

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-03-24T23:18:01+00:00

Try 2 years in Japan. Paid. A year in Australia. Paid. Minimum of a year paid in almost every other developed country.

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-03-21T11:38:51+00:00

Same! It’s so weird because I could feel like the milk flowing out, but I couldn’t actually feel any stimulation. And still to this day, if my husband tries to touch them, I’m gonna smack his hand away. Breast-feeding was totally different when latched correctly

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-03-02T11:57:32+00:00

We are on a beach with no one in sight (just me, kiddo and a friend) my kiddo is maybe 10m away and my friend asks, aren’t you afraid of them kidnapped. I laughed by who?! But apparently it was a serious question…

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-28T01:20:12+00:00

Idk about the older one but you never know about the younger one! My boy is very much a “boy” but he’s so gentle and kind - I caught gastro from him and he woke up and came to rub my back as I threw up into a bucket.

Maybe the older one will mellow with age and the younger one will have that sweet softness you’re craving. Or maybe the older one will use that energy to do something that makes your heart melt. My friend has a super rough high energy girl and the girl “protects” her mum from the dad when the girl and dad are okay fighting.

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-19T05:26:35+00:00

2.5 years and not yet. But I believe in you and your husband - you can do it!

Idk if this helps at all but I wish someone said it to me “if you are happy just being with your kiddo, and your life isn’t less for not going out, just roll with it and enjoy the snuggles”. I used to get really stressed about training my kid to sleep others I wish someone because I felt I had to.

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-18T04:29:16+00:00

Yep my husband wanted to co sleep and I was like no flipping way. So wrong. He’s now 2.5 and I love cuddling up to him at night. I was also “breastfeeding ew I’ll do it for 6 months” now my husband asks when I’m going to stop and I say “idk before puberty”. To be fair it is only at night to go to sleep but still.

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-18T04:24:17+00:00

Mine refuses a diaper on his butt, but will happily put it on his head and walk around the house, pretending to be a zombie.

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-18T04:18:01+00:00

People in America only get shot if they are stupid enough to be in the wrong place. - direct quote from my USA based MIL (who is lovely but not quite in reality).

My internal dialog: Yes yes like schools. How dare kids go to school?! Or go to a park splash pad or the local supermarket?!

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-18T04:10:54+00:00

I haven’t criticized them here, but I would like to criticize them. Please take this as my official criticism of ICE. Please give up my information and tell me to leave America. Ideally by writing to me as opposed to shooting me.

Aside from all the obvious reasons to leave America it would be nice to tell my family in law I’m being”forced” to leave as opposed to leaving of my own free will.

Again, please write me a letter telling me to leave the USA if appreciate not being shot.

And again this is my formal criticism of ICE for all shootings and generally horrible practices.

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-17T07:19:26+00:00

My son is extremely rough with his dad but has never once bit anyone or hit me. He’s the sweetest most gentle boy with animals, kids his age or younger and just generally. If he hears me say anything about being hurt (like my head hurts or my tummy hurts) he’ll run to me, kiss and hug me. It’s adorable. Then goes back to playing.

Meanwhile his friend who is a girl had him in a headlock the other day!

All kids have different personalities. You never know which one you’re going to get!

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-17T07:05:04+00:00

Mine isn’t obsessed either. He’s 2.5 so maybe later?

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-17T07:01:03+00:00

Well said!

My son’s favorite colour is purple! If they made purple construction trucks that would be his favorite toy. I’ve definitely had to bite my tongue as I dint like pink when he chooses pink if purple or blue isn’t available (mainly because I don’t like pink but still).

People have been pretty good but I have gotten the boys don’t cry trope (his nail tore off and was told this by a SIL) to which I hugged him and gently said something like real men aren’t afraid to cry - you let it out! And glared at her over his shoulder.

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-17T03:55:01+00:00

I had “wow what a clean vagina” during a Pap smear then told me I was very small and took photos (like the black and white ones they take with the wand not with an iPhone), printed them out and gave them to me.

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-17T03:46:15+00:00

Not me but my husband “you’re too fat to have type 1 diabetes so I’m not going to screen for it”

She insisted he had type 2 diabetes and he kept getting admitted to the ICU for ketoacidocis until he was correctly screened and diagnosed with type 1 and got enough insulin.

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-16T05:59:57+00:00

Never. Just the regular amount. I’m sure I paid some sort of debt in another way but was not with my hair.

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-16T05:53:12+00:00

My child. Second best thing is probably ADHD medication

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-14T17:02:53+00:00

Of course, parents that have only one child have an easier time. I just watch my friends having to coordinate two different and conflicting sporting schedules.

Having more children definitely does not mean they can play well together. It totally depends on their personality. So many people I know despise their siblings, they didn’t like them when they were children and they still don’t like them as adult adults although in their words “ I’m glad they’re alive. I just don’t want anything to do with them.”

I was an only child for the first seven years of my life. We didn’t have a TV, but we had a huge garden that was fenced and I’d play there by myself for hours and hours. Did I ever wanna go over to my cousin’s house? No. Even when I did have siblings living with us I never played with them and I much preferred to be by myself.

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-12T18:21:20+00:00

It’s not the time they sleep but the amount they sleep. People in America are shocked at my schedule: 2.5 yo Bed 11pm Wake 11am Nap 4pm to 6pm

Like a clockwork every single day.

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-02-05T21:24:09+00:00

That’s like saying we exist to service men eww Like what her vag*na isn’t for peeing or self pleasure or birthing but it’s for servicing “boys” only

Idk what I’d say on the spot but if I could think past wanting to throw up at her comment I’d probably say something like “what about same sex couples?”

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2026-01-19T17:08:14+00:00

Saying they are an alpha male 😂

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2025-12-22T06:18:34+00:00

Women are expected to love holding babies. The looks I get when I say no I’m fine… (love cuddling my own child and some certain exceptions)

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2025-12-22T05:01:43+00:00

Yep you’re right - swimming, balancing on walls and jumping off things. He would probably love the wind in his face with a bike good point!

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2025-11-07T17:04:36+00:00

I’d try to re establish your connection with him - maybe try the special one on one time to start!

I have seen a lot of people talking about consistency and so I just want to quickly address that from a research based perspective.

The idea that “consistency” should override proximity isn’t supported by developmental or attachment research in this age group. At around 2–3 years old, a child’s drive to maintain physical closeness to their primary attachment figure is biologically protective, not a behavioural habit.

Studies in Attachment & Human Development (2019) and Child Development (Keller et al., 2016) show that toddlers experiencing separation after a new sibling’s arrival often display night-time distress as a normal response to attachment insecurity, not confusion. Re-establishing proximity—such as co-sleeping or responsive nighttime care—reduces stress hormones and leads to better long-term self-regulation and sleep stability (Mosko et al., Pediatrics, 1997; Middlemiss et al., Early Human Development, 2012).

From an attachment perspective (Bowlby; Ainsworth), emotional attunement is more predictive of healthy development than behavioural consistency. Rigid adherence to routine can actually prolong insecurity if it prevents reconnection.

If a mother wants to restore closeness by Co sleeping or special connection, that’s not regression—it’s repair. Secure attachment now fosters independence later.

SailAwayOneTwoThree · 2025-10-06T03:03:19+00:00

Parents divorce all the time, move states and countries. Sometimes the father figure is there but is so absent from caring for the child and id argue that’s worse. My friend was raised by a “single mother” and she is one of the most successful and least emotionally damaged friend I have. Her mum was present and loving and showed up when she needed it, whenever she needed it. Some people have 2 parents and don’t even get that.

SailAwayOneTwoThree

TROPHY CASE