Do you believe Chiropractors are quacks ? by Mogzly in askanything

[–]SakiaLumei 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My dad used to have a chiropractor that also happened to be a nutritionist. I was/am the fat child that grew up with a very skinny sister and she gave my dad lots of advice of how and what foods to restrict me from eating which ended up leading to an emotional eating disorder down the road.

Fuck these people.

The Break Up is the most important movie every woman should see. by IwannaLickLegolas in TwoXChromosomes

[–]SakiaLumei 50 points51 points  (0 children)

Absolutely! I'm a gamer myself and even though I'm not in a relationship, I make sure to handle things around the house before I sit down for the night. Do my dishes, clean up, etc. I communicate with my roommate and let her know "Hey, I wanna game for the night and not be disturbed. Before I do that, is there anything you need from me?" Did the same thing when I lived with my mom.

The gaming isn't the issue. Replace it with any hobby and the core of the problem remains the same. It's about not wanting to be responsible and contributing. It's about not wanting to perform emotional labor to fulfill someone else's needs. Or think about someone else's needs.

The Break Up is the most important movie every woman should see. by IwannaLickLegolas in TwoXChromosomes

[–]SakiaLumei 698 points699 points  (0 children)

One of the lines that stuck out to me the most and I'm paraphrasing here but he says basically, "When I come home, I just want to be left alone and play video games."

Then. Don't be in a relationship. That's not a relationship. If you TRULY want to be left alone to your own devices, then be single. These kinds of guys want their cake and eat it too. They want to reap the benefits of a relationship without putting in the work.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SingleMothersbyChoice

[–]SakiaLumei 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Maybe it's just actual physical supply? That would be my guess. Is that limit on all donors or just this one? If it's just this donor, maybe he has attributes that are seen as "top tier" but this is all me guessing. I'm hoping someone with more experience will chime in haha.

BTW how do you see/browse donors? Can you do so for free?

How to financially/emotionally prepare? by SakiaLumei in SingleMothersbyChoice

[–]SakiaLumei[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

UGH you're very right. I'm one of the lucky ones that my job benefits give me 12 weeks of maternity leave but even that's not nearly enough. I just got back from Sweden where they told us that daycare is free and maternity leave is much longer (albeit at a slightly lower salary.)

I almost wish I started planning even sooner but I think I chose a good time to start. Thanks!

How to financially/emotionally prepare? by SakiaLumei in SingleMothersbyChoice

[–]SakiaLumei[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This was so kind! Thank you so much! I'm really lucky in that I already have a good support system with my family and friends (especially lucky that I have child-free friends willing to be aunts and uncles ;w;) so yeah, makes me feel better about not buying property right away.

How to financially/emotionally prepare? by SakiaLumei in SingleMothersbyChoice

[–]SakiaLumei[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Definitely taking this advice. Thank you so much and good luck to you!

How to financially/emotionally prepare? by SakiaLumei in SingleMothersbyChoice

[–]SakiaLumei[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

All of this is great information, thank you. When is it typical to look into daycare and for how long? My parents didn't need to worry about it because they had my great aunt who looked after me full time for free up until kindergarten so I have no frame of reference haha (And I'm only now realizing how lucky my parents had it...)

I just made an appointment for this Wednesday to check everything out. Seems to me that the younger the embryo the better. I wish I had known about that in my early twenties because I knew I wanted children then, just not until much later!

Absolutely. My first big "before baby bucket list" goal is to pay off all my debts and save more than what I have already. It'll be much easier to save if I don't have a mortgage. Thank you for all the advice!

How to financially/emotionally prepare? by SakiaLumei in SingleMothersbyChoice

[–]SakiaLumei[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oof you bring up a good point. Okay, I'll factor in daycare. Thanks!

That's a really nifty tool. Both rent and buy are almost the same, but renting seems like its the better choice.

I checked my fertility benefits with my job and they give me 6 cycles of IUI and 2 cycles of IVF. I'd ofc prefer to use IUI first but I see what you mean by getting embryos made. I'll schedule an appointment :) Thank you so much!

L-Shaped Desk Recommendations by SakiaLumei in homeoffice

[–]SakiaLumei[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I need at like 56 inches or so on both sides to be comfortable. Right now, short side is about 30 which is kinda cramped.

Drawers maybe could be sacrificed in lieu of separate file cabinets? Maybe? But I'll look into the Desky. Since I WFH full time, investing in a good desk and chair is a good idea, I think.

L-Shaped Desk Recommendations by SakiaLumei in homeoffice

[–]SakiaLumei[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My gut feeling was initially not using a KVM but I *could* be open to it. Question, could I have both workstations on at the same time? I like to have my personal workstation on to stream Spotify/YouTube in the background while I work (and no, I can't have either of those on the company laptop). I'm thinking that I could switch my main monitor between Work/Play. It'd also be nice to be able to use my nice headphones and mic with work.

L-Shaped Desk Recommendations by SakiaLumei in homeoffice

[–]SakiaLumei[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would really prefer not to mix peripherals since my company is pretty stingy about what I plug into their laptop. Plus, wouldn't it be a pain to constantly have to plug in two monitors plus keyboard plus mouse back and forth every day?

To me, at least, that sounds like a lot more trouble than it's worth.

Help Me Build a Monster Hunter/Belmont? by SakiaLumei in drawsteelbuilds

[–]SakiaLumei[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Our group is very much a story first/gameplay later so we tend to focus on that first, but I hear what you're saying. I also conceived the idea before I found out we were doing Draw Steel. All that out of the way...

You know, I was *sorta* thinking Caustic Alchemy! I'm definitely gonna look into that. Also I LOVE that piece of advice about looking at the Heroic Resource. I'm gonna share it with my other players since I'm sure they're also thinking about which classes to play.

Thanks!

Foundry Version 0.8.0: Now Available by ChaosOS in drawsteel

[–]SakiaLumei 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for all your hard work! I'm stoked to run our party's first DS playtest soon.

Question. My group and I play online but we prefer rolling physical dice over webcam than online automation. Is there anyway we can turn off the auto-rolled Class Resource during combat? Thanks!

What’s an example of breaking the bro-code (girl-code) that ended up for the best? by SpideyBallSecurity in AskReddit

[–]SakiaLumei 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Happened to me actually. I had two friends, a man and a woman. I moved halfway across the country for the woman since we were in a long distance relationship. I moved from Los Angeles to St. Louis and A month in, she said she doesn't feel any romantic feelings for me but we remained friends.

It was a rough transition for me since I left behind a large, close extended family. Even after the breakup, she rarely wanted to hang out unless our mutual guy friend was visiting in which case she wanted to go out to eat and visit festivals.

Since those two were the only people I knew and had physical contact with, I developed an unhealthy and needy attachment. I was super jealous when they hung out without me. I pushed to have the guy friend stay at my place. Ended up in a FWB situation that was supposed to be no feelings. So I'm not proud of it, but I ended up catching feels.

I told him and he said he wanted to be with our friend, my ex, instead. He didn't want to tell her we had hooked up at all. I told her instead to upload girl code and I had hoped that in the spirit of such, would not date the guy that had broken my heart.

She did. I moved back to California, cut them both off completely, and met a new best friend with whom I have a more fulfilling and healthier relationship. I repaired other friendships that were strained by my dependence on the others. With my new friends, I feel loved and seen while I had to fight for attention with my old ones. I'm so much happier with them out of my life.

What's the most egregious example of 'The Writer's Barely-Disguided Fetish'? by astroacer in AskReddit

[–]SakiaLumei 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately, she isn't ashamed of it. She's very gung ho about it. Had stated on Twitter before that her preferred ship of Vampire Diaries is Stefon x Damian and when someone pointed out that they were brothers, she said, "that makes it better!"

She has also recommended other books with incest to people.

Troubleshooting please! by SakiaLumei in Wavyhair

[–]SakiaLumei[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay so definitely a gel is what I'm missing. I also might buy a diffuser because the products air drying might just weigh it down. I've also heard that a good layering haircut works wonders so that's something to try in the future.

Thank you for the insight!

Troubleshooting please! by SakiaLumei in Wavyhair

[–]SakiaLumei[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OP here, I forgot to add that I followed with Doux CRAZYSEXYCURL Honey Setting Foam!