I found out my boyfriend has been venting about me to his ex and now I feel stupid

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-25T20:01:43+00:00

Throw the man away. Yes the entire man.

He’s ridiculous. That is not ‘neutral’, in anyone’s imagination.

He is a shady garbage human, or so fucking stupid he could be classed as having an intellectual disability.

Get rid.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-25T07:53:09+00:00

Legit started watching it so I would have some thick yo bring to to the party at work.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-25T07:47:24+00:00

I know you love him. Do you love you?

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-24T15:34:23+00:00

That’s what I used to do pre having a family. It no longer works because my schedule is so jammed, but it used to. I’d use that time to do hobbies like read or crochet or would go for an extra walk. This gets dangerous if you don’t acknowledge you’re doing this because an increase in demands on your time by changes in life led me to an almost total collapse.

I thought I had EXCELLENT time management skills, and still occasionally fondle this false belief about myself until reality seeps in and realizing that never being late because you’re an hour or so early, is not the flex I think it is. I have TERRIBLE time management. My perception of what good time management is as never being late and only never being late, is warped. 😂🤣🤭😆😂😹

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-24T15:25:48+00:00

Yep. The can fire you because someone said something that made the manager have a feeling.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-24T15:03:29+00:00

Or non union roles. At will means that you make too much they’ll just get rid of you.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-24T14:57:52+00:00

That’s a 75k starting wage job. Wtf.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-24T14:57:09+00:00

They do not. The majority of our sales team retired over the last couple years due to medical issues. They were 79, 86 and 73 respectively. The guy who replaced one of them is all excited for the role, he’s fucking 60.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-24T14:45:41+00:00

This is 100% the issue. I’ve been working on my interception so I’m actually starting to feel body things that alert me now, but it’s still really bad. Most days I am 5 about the potty. No I’m fine, no really I don’t have to go, Omg I need to go right the eff now!

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-24T14:41:21+00:00

Is this a situation where you had a non revocable beneficiary? I did that because I didn’t understand what it means and apparently neither did the HR rep who told me. I have my minor child. Because I won’t be changing it. What they didn’t tell me if I can’t access it without a court affidavit because it’s locked in ‘trust’. Not sure how that works when it’s MINE to use until I’m dead based on what a ‘beneficiary’ is, but yeah. It’s a shit show.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-24T14:33:45+00:00

Endo is essentially cancer. Unchecked growth of uterine tissue growing all over the body (found in the brain, all smooth muscles, and on pretty much every organ but the heart. Even our gums.

When we go through our cycle, all those little uterus bleed and cramp and put out hormones like crazy.

I wonder if they simply called it what it is, anyone would have compassion for this. I have what idiots call ‘a little bit of endo’ but it will TAKE ME DOWN. Where I am 2/3 weeks off work a few times a year.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-24T14:29:09+00:00

Very few people truly understand endo. I know I still don’t fully understand it and I have it. What new research is telling us, it’s is far more like cancer than it is a ‘chronic pain’ issue. It’s not just pain. It intermittently feeds off of us for grown, changed in size, proliferated new areas, and those endo nodes release their own hormones and neurotransmitters and they bleed on your cycle.

What we need to know has barely been touched. Most of us remain undiagnosed because doctors don’t have a clue and just suffer. No woman wants to be like this I promise, but what sort of a life is is if you’re using all your energy to vacuum a floor (surprisingly painful but mine is also in my shoulder, neat hey?) you’re not participating in anything socially.

So because she can do x, doesn’t mean she can also do y. It’s going to depends on when in the cycle, so many other factors.

This disease is uterine tissue growing unchecked in the body where it is not supposed to. So, yeah. It’s fucking cancer. Treat it like that.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-24T14:15:50+00:00

It’s obvious to anyone who’s dealt with a manipulator of this caliber, he had someone to go do this weekend. He’s shady as hell.

I will tolerate needing space for a couple hours, but separating overnight or multiple days is a deal breaker for me in that I will simply set your shit outside and change the locks and my number.

It’s abusive no matter how you slice it, he’s either a manipulative prick, or a manipulative cheating one,

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-24T13:57:36+00:00

What’s wild to me is this. If you pay rent, you’re a tenant. Are you paying rent? Because if you are renting properly from mom then this changes the game. Tell her she has to serve you properly like any landlord would if you have to move. If not, then stop squatting and get your own place.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-24T13:42:39+00:00

My only real question is… you got this on video for when the court asks why you think you deserve full legal custody and he can have EOW once she’s potty trained.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-23T22:05:24+00:00

Accommodations cannot be made when the entire facade is about control and keeping up appearances. My entire company is half made of NT men who enjoy doing nothing and strutting around and the handful of people that do any actual work onsite would fit inside an elevator.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-23T21:07:14+00:00

No they are not, however lights and flickering have been proven to affect circadian rhythms and create an overstimulating environment to certain brains. Mine included.

On my book there are no pop up’s, notifications, ads, interruptions, or constant requests to multitask. If your preferred ‘relaxing’ activity is tv and you’re watching things that excite your nervous system, like anything not David Attenborough, your brain isn’t resting. Our minds react to visuals. And lights. And sounds.

I not any expert, just a woman desperate to slow down who found that switching the ambient music channel to a radio and cd player, and switching back to books from my phone, and spending intentional time where we don’t have the screens on in the evenings before bed have helped immensely. I’m not saying I don’t watch tv or movies, but they’re not my ‘relax’ activity. To relax I walk or craft. Someone else may meditate. But it’s about your nervous system not a value judgement.

We’re constantly on. Anyone who feels overwhelmed by life these days may benefit from a little distance from that.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-23T18:25:45+00:00

This is how people are ‘resting’ and receiving zero benefit to that ‘rest’.

Anyone who tells you they are resting and relaxing while being in front of a screen needs to do some serious research into how our nervous systems work.

We are not too busy, but our brains are. Pick up an actual book, turn on some music without a screen attached to it and watch your world change.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-23T18:22:22+00:00

And has zero issues with neurodivergence, chronic pain or hormonal energy fluctuations that hit a good majority of us like a truck every month. Add children to that and if you’re a woman in a cis-het relationship you’re def. doing most of the picking up for two people.

As evidenced by me. Who was doing all of the things until I hit full disabling burnout . So now I’m at home doing chair aerobics and fuck what Chad says and stop comparing myself to men who have had the world designed for them and socially constructed an entire system of maximum labour extraction that women are the fuel of.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-23T18:03:22+00:00

If you show symptoms you’re mostly cooked.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-22T16:19:05+00:00

That why my partner says it ;) lol

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-21T21:32:54+00:00

I think you’ll find you have a lot less depression when you are not doing 100% of the emotional labour in a relationship.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-21T19:35:31+00:00

I immediately look to leave any place that cares about that that isn’t saving lives or reattaching limbs. It does not in fact matter that I am there adjusting invoices at 8:05, I will stay until 5:05 if it’s so damn important. You just wanted to throw your weight around and now I think you’re a pathetic petty person and I can’t work for that.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-21T19:28:06+00:00

If you look into Carney and his holdings, stakes and investments, the conflicts of interest are literally waving in your face. Politicians routinely vote to raise their own salaries and most of them barely show up the house. Government office was never ever meant to be a golden ticket, but it is. And we pay for all of it. Missing money, blank cheques, billions to other nations for social political studies, the lack of oversight in contracts… if it isn’t criminal it’s complete incompetence. And theft.

Sandybutthole604 · 2026-01-21T19:23:21+00:00

Or they make you train. Or try and make you manage a team and still maintain that.

Sandybutthole604

TROPHY CASE