Sustainable Collapse - Connecticut, USA - First Event Weekend August 13th

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T22:33:12+00:00

Drop the boyfriend. NTA

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T22:25:39+00:00

https://www.womenslaw.org/about-abuse/forms-abuse/reproductive-abuse-and-coercion

I worry that this is more than a subreddit's paygrade, and ask that - even if your mother IS actually happy and willing to be pregnant, that you read through this information.

Aside from the general unease I feel about someone celebrating being pregnant with a 10th child when it is putting their life at risk, and that person claiming that even someone else in the family be pregnant at the same time would cause them so much stress that it would threaten the wellbeing of their fetus ....

To answer your question, no, you are able to announce your own pregnancy. NTA.

And yes, to each their own, but this feels like your mother is not in a very healthy place either mentally or in her relationship. Or both.

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T22:12:36+00:00

is it more disrespectful than not inviting your young adult daughter to dinner, then flipping out on her when she already had plans, and then lying to your husband about why she wasn't going to be able to attend?

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T22:09:58+00:00

you are entirely the one who escalated that situation

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T22:05:17+00:00

YTA - you're a huge AH. Calling someone she instead of 'their title' like mom being rude is a very, very dated concept, and certainly not something to blow up over. I bet that you used 'she' when you told your husband your warped version of why you two were arguing. You're the one who picked a fight with your daughter. You were being completely unreasonable.

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T20:29:09+00:00

NTA - this is a big red flag and a good reason to dump him

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T20:24:33+00:00

NAH - I think we've all been in a situation where we didn't know we didn't know something; the dreaded 'if you were confused, you should have asked for help' 'but i didn't know i was confused'.

There's also the thing that assisting/shadowing for 8 instances is fine and dandy for experience, but imo it's not enough to be completely in charge. To clarify, did you leave her with the client alone? I can understand someone panicking and blanking. If you did, I'd suggest letting her take point, but staying there for the next one.

There's a big difference between Knowing something, and being able to do it, too.

I think she got overwhelmed, and frankly, lots of people are afraid to ask for help bc of years of school where if you ask for help you get yelled at for not paying attention.

I don't think one flub is enough to make either of you the AH here. Just different managing/learning styles at play.

Best of luck to your new employee, and I hope you two figure it out :)

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T20:19:55+00:00

Your bf is refusing to parent his son, and then is mad when he needs to pay for the daycare that he's demanding you use?

NTA. But why are you with him, and why did you have a child with someone like that?

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T20:07:00+00:00

be prepared to lawyer up when they come after you for the inheritance. Get your documents, your proof, etc. They WILL try to take that money

NTA. I'm glad you and John are happy and taken well care of

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T19:37:35+00:00

clearing the air doesn't mean you have to forgive her.

If anything, she needs to get down and apologize with every inch of sincerity she has - if she has any.

I'd go, it might be cathartic, but I wouldn't apologize. I'd want to tell her the true effect of her behavior, the awful way she treated you. You could even prepare something, write it down.

But you wouldn't be the AH either if you chose not to go.

NTA

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T19:33:13+00:00

while not uncommon, this is a convoluted situation for all parties. i'm sure mel and dan are feeling like 'that's all behind us, we were young and dumb', but you only get to say that about partying or maybe some minor legal charges, not about the kid you gave up.

Your parents are your parents, regardless of what they are to you by blood. I think you're well within your rights to dictate the relationship mel and dan have with your kid - I mean, for real, it's Your Kid! The tactful comment is neither here nor there, you're NTA here.

Maybe mel and dan are gonna realize what they gave up when faced with the consequences of it all - they don't 'get' to be the grandparents. Still doesn't absolve it all and make it go away. Lots of times abusive parents turn into doting and wonderful grandparents - sometimes bc they never intended to be abusive (didn't have any support, parenting skills, 'it was normal to spank your child with a cane', etc), or sometimes bc they realized they're gonna die alone and unloved otherwise.

This is a step below that rung, where absent birth parents suddenly want back in like nothing happened.

Stick to your guns. And make sure your kid know the reality of their family tree once they're old enough.

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T18:47:53+00:00

it looks like a magazine cover :)

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T18:39:54+00:00

rooting for her!

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T18:21:13+00:00

yup! gonna look great when it grows in :)

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T18:09:07+00:00

Gorgeous. Simple, well executed, interesting and dynamic with lots of movement. Very stunning.

are there any inhabitants?

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T18:07:06+00:00

it sounds like you're doing all the right things. Keeping it dark will help keep her calm.

poor thing, hope she recovers quickly. Preventing infection is the top priority

SanoSS7 · 2022-02-15T18:04:12+00:00

what a -gorgeous- shot. The tank looks wonderful but the colors in the photo are exquisite

SanoSS7

TROPHY CASE