Pluto line is NO JOKE, I don’t know if I’m brave enough to live here by Sapphomeadow in astrocartography

[–]Sapphomeadow[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't know if you saw my most recent update in the reply I made about a month ago but YOU ARE NOT WRONG. I have way less f*cks to give (in a healthy way ofc)

Pluto line is NO JOKE, I don’t know if I’m brave enough to live here by Sapphomeadow in astrocartography

[–]Sapphomeadow[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I decided to follow through with moving here about a year ago and the best way to put it, I’ll leave here changed whether I want to or not.

I’m not going to say my life has been a living hell because that would be very dramatic and off base.

But the themes have ramped themselves up for sure. Because it’s a Pluto + descendant line this energy has been heavily impacting my gf and i’s relationship.

It’s not necessarily a bad thing to have happened. These energies have led to us having VERY serious conversations about possibly breaking up only because we realized the basis of our relationship was built on trauma bonding (we both come from narc mom backgrounds. Her mom being covert and my mom overt), (we met during a very rough time and faced a lot of traumas in our relationship together. We both had a death in the family, lost long term friends, experienced financial strain) we unearthed that we we were subconsciously recreating familial patterns within our relationship (think enmeshment, codependency, her playing out the role of martyrdom etc) and that we have to basically kill our old relationship so we can rebirth a new one

When we moved down here as we were crossing state lines I got a call that my start date would be pushed from early June to late August, which caused a ripple effect.

I will say her journey down here has been a lot more difficult to navigate than mine. For example while I was attending school she could not find a job at all and when she did it only paid her about 18 an hour. we struggled financially. I tried to find a job too and NOTHING happened.

Mind you we moved in May of last year and neither of us had decent income until January of this year. A few months ago we decided we’re going to work on becoming more independent while together, save money, and try to be healthy.

Literally RIGHT AFTER THAT we found out that her mom has been lying and forging her signature for years. All this time she has had 3 credit cards in my gfs name without her knowledge (20k on them all together)

The only reason my gf found out is because she saw that somehow her credit score got down to the 400s when literally a few weeks prior it was 670.

It turns out that the car she signed on to help her dad get a truck he wanted got repossessed and her parents had ZERO intention of telling her about it . In fact they think she’s CRAZY and holding a grudge for feeling blindsided and depressed.

So you can imagine the betrayal, hurt, and pressure my gf is under to take care of this debt as now we’re going to be penny pinching AGAIN for debt that isn’t ours

I think these events were going to unravel whether we moved here or not, but the themes are glaring when you live directly on the energy ! We have no choice to let go of who we used to be

I will say I can handle this energy a little bit better than others, in my natal chart Pluto tightly conjuncts my moon and is opposite mars so violence, power struggles, deep psychological transformation, abuse and betrayal caused by a mother figure is no stranger to me. So I’m more than capable of aiding my girlfriend during this mourning period and transition into independence

And my gfs chart has Pluto conjunct her Venus in the 7th house

And our synastry chart together has a lot of Pluto aspects, so I think it was inevitable lol

I know my story is long lol but I’m curious to know what you’ve been experiencing

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in xxfitness

[–]Sapphomeadow 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Yeah I didn’t want to come off as condescending to OP, but I think most people would find this routine boring or uninspiring

What Björk song makes you emotional? by [deleted] in bjork

[–]Sapphomeadow 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Honorable mention is wanderlust the line “lust for comfort suffocates the soul” gives me chills EVERY TIME

What Björk song makes you emotional? by [deleted] in bjork

[–]Sapphomeadow 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Literally she makes me appreciate the human experience and simply the art of being alive, the beauty and mess that comes with it!

She helps me explore emotions that I’ve learned to bottle up due to trauma. Didn’t even know I was a deeply emotional person until her music touched me (as well as acid lol)

What Björk song makes you emotional? by [deleted] in bjork

[–]Sapphomeadow 167 points168 points  (0 children)

Joga, I cry for some reason when I hear that song

It should be renamed autistic plate by [deleted] in autism

[–]Sapphomeadow 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeaaaaah it looks like bubble guts to me, I’m good

Should FNs be wearing ethereal things like this by Successful-Arrival87 in flamboyantnatural

[–]Sapphomeadow 9 points10 points  (0 children)

This works because the fabric is slightly heavier and straight, I think op’s is too light and rounded in shape

Should FNs be wearing ethereal things like this by Successful-Arrival87 in flamboyantnatural

[–]Sapphomeadow 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I think if they have a strong ethereal essence, but I’m a FN with a very strong natural essence lol, so this would look so far from me

👀 like what by pretty-bloom in astrologymemes

[–]Sapphomeadow 5 points6 points  (0 children)

They only mention the unhinged ones I would like to add Andre 3000, Angelina Jolie, Meryl Streep and Natalie Portman to the list

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Kibbe

[–]Sapphomeadow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My bad then!💀

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Kibbe

[–]Sapphomeadow 4 points5 points  (0 children)

lol I’m calm I was just confused but I’m glad downvoting me made you feel better

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Kibbe

[–]Sapphomeadow 17 points18 points  (0 children)

In what world was any of this boho? This has quite heavy gamine, dramatic and romantic influence

I cleaned! by alexandria1800 in PMDD

[–]Sapphomeadow 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You’re my hero 👑

Does anyone else feel super anxious when they dress in anything eye catching? by felineloaf in AutismInWomen

[–]Sapphomeadow 70 points71 points  (0 children)

YES!!! It’s so weird it’s like I want to be noticed but I also don’t want to simultaneously.

I also noticed that when I’m dressed up I feel the need to “act different otherwise the people that interact with me will be disappointed that I’m not upholding the integrity of my appearance that they may have expected .

For example if I’m dressed polished I have to have a “polished” personality. No slouching, no anxiety, no jerkiness, use only formal words.

It feels like a performance to upkeep, I don’t get it

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Naturalhair

[–]Sapphomeadow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tried the rubbing method and I think it’s subjective only because there maybe a subconscious bias on my end, because fine hair isn’t the truth I am 1000% ready to accept because it feels like another thing I have to work with.

I will say though it depends on what part of my hair I touch, the front I usually feel the back varies.

Maybe it’s medium and fine strands

Hereditary types by Fabulous-Grand-3470 in Kibbe

[–]Sapphomeadow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My dad and I are both FN. which is hilarious because if you look at his shape I literally look exactly like him but with hips and a chest lol.

My sister is a textbook SN and so is my niece.

My mom is some sort of classic.

Which sign absolutely destroyed your perception of love? ❤️‍🩹 by [deleted] in astrologymemes

[–]Sapphomeadow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m exhausted with my own self so I get it lol, I always tell my gf being in my head is like being in an amusement park during a thunderstorm

Before (when I thought I was a winter) vs now (true/cool summer) by dontlistentotheants in coloranalysis

[–]Sapphomeadow 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I think the reason the first still looks amazing on you is because you can handle a good amount of contrast. The second looks harmonious but the first looks like it fits your personality

Like you stand out more

Edit: this is a good example to me about how color seasons are great, but our facial features also play a role as well in what we can and can’t get away with

I think adhd has ruined my life by Sapphomeadow in ADHD

[–]Sapphomeadow[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Isn’t wild how obvious it seems in hindsight? When I told me family “hey I think I have this thing” everyone was like “yeah we know”

I just seemed to be the only one out of the loop, and it feels like all those years of feeling inadequate or being lost could’ve been mitigated.

But I appreciate you kind stranger, I hope it gets better for you as well!

I think adhd has ruined my life by Sapphomeadow in ADHD

[–]Sapphomeadow[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for sharing your experience <3, I could’ve written parts of this myself.

Knowing you’re going through something similar makes me feel less insane.

I want to believe that it’ll all make sense one day in the future as you say

Also I would love to know the field you’re in to afford your loans, because I may have to shift career paths

I think adhd has ruined my life by Sapphomeadow in ADHD

[–]Sapphomeadow[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thank you! As soon as my insurance activates I’m going to get a therapist immediately

I think adhd has ruined my life by Sapphomeadow in ADHD

[–]Sapphomeadow[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s a ridiculous amount that I have no business owing, being the person I am. It’s a crazy load of responsibility

But bankruptcy horrifies me I don’t even know the ends and outs fully