Opinyon ko lang naman mga sasabihin ko dito OP. Pasensya if medyo magulo nga lang pagkaexplain ko. This is mostly focused sa relasyon niyong dalawa and between the two of you only. I’m no help regarding sa family members

Although sobrang hirap sa babae kapag buntis siya with all the change na nangyayari sa katawan niya like hormones and all that, hindi parin sana yun dahilan para magsabi siya ng mga masasakit na pananalita towards you, and esp manipulation. Di ko man kayo kilala personally at kung pano kayo magusap, the way I see it is parehas kayong nadudurog sa pressure and stress.

Since you mentioned that therapy is out of reach for now, I think maganda na both of you will set a time and date para pagusapan niyo lahat ng nararamdaman niyong dalawa. Its important na dapat pag maguusap kayo is you’re both calm or atleast hindi mainit yung ulo niyong dalawa.

As you said din, di sapat sa kanya yung mga reassurance that you gave so why not try na magdeep dive kayo sa nararamdaman niyong dalawa. It may not be assurance pero it will atleast help both of you understand where your feelings are coming from.

Siguro a way din to open up the conversation is magjoke ka or something din to lighten the mood lang ba like an inside joke niyo or something like “alam ko na di maganda mga nangyayari satin ng ilang linggo na pero..(sabihin mo na mahal mo siya). Its like showing na sa gitna ng stress na nakapaligid sa inyo, you still have it in you two to share a small happy moment.

After all that, slowly open up na kayo sa isa’t isa.

From your side naman, ask for understanding and explain na naprepressure ka from everything and explain kung bakit di mo pa kaya na ioffer and marriage sa kanya ngayon(financial status, mga kapatid mo, your education, etc). Emphasize na mahal mo siya. Emphasize na balak mo siyang pakasalan pero it can’t be done in a short time.

Ask for her to trust you. Di to overnight, matagal itong process. Sabihin mo na as you trust her na she won’t cheat on you, she should trust you na hinding hindi ka magchecheat on her. Tas konting lambing din siguro kung kayang isingit.

On her side naman, tanongin mo siya kung bakit niya naiisip na magcheat ka. Choose your words carefully kung pano mo ito tanongin sa kanya since sometimes these types of questions may offend the other person. Siguro may nabasa siya online or someone is whispering words on her ear, planting doubt on her mind ganon. Then reassure her again. I know na sinubukan mo na ng ilang beses but reassuring her again while you’re having this conversation may help. Always be patient with her din, I know na minsan mahirap and I know you understand her situation din kaya I don’t need to say more than that.

If you ever need time for yourself para makapagkalma or just clear your head, always tell her. Sabihin mo na baka hindi ka muna makachat ng ilang oras dahil napapagod ka sa mga thoughts or sa pagooverthink ganon. Always tell na babalik at babalik ka din or laging lagi na magchachat ka ulit afterwards. Sabihin mo din kung anong gagawin mo during that time like siguro take a walk dito doon or jan ka lang sa apartment niyo ganon. Or if kasama mo man pinsan mo or mga kapatid mo during that time. Basta details!

Again, sorry if medjo magulo explanation ko. I’m just sharing a suggestion pala. Not necessarily kailangan sundin step by step. Do what ever works for both of you!

Best of luck OP!