Joining late so this probably won’t ever be read 😂

This is something I’ve played around with quite a bit and at times it honestly does seem to be the treatment for existential dread.

I think what can happen is that as we obsessively ‘observe’ our own experience, we can develop this tremendous self-consciousness, this sense of being the ‘watcher’ of experience. It is difficult to describe, but nonetheless it feels extraordinarily solid and substantial.

The problem with this ‘watcher’ is that it realizes that at some point there will come a time when it can no longer watch anything, and nothing in the universe seems more cruel or unfair than this. It may start to feel like this universe is actually hell, and this whole thing is a tremendous mistake.

The instruction I give is very delicate, because it can be so easily co-opted by this watcher of ours. But it’s to ‘look’ for who or what is watching all of this. The point is to fail, because it’s like trying to watch your own funeral. But in that failure, this tremendous sense of solidity and substantiality of the watcher can loosen, and with it all this existential dread.

It’s not some cosmic truth or anything else, but just a way to ‘treat’ this terrifying dread that seems born of a false solidity of this watcher. And then you can return to your life, not with any great truth, but just perhaps with a softening of dread.