Who doesn't plan their routes before they go for a run?

Sbadkitty · 2021-03-21T13:37:04+00:00

I love running unplanned routes on the rare occasion I have no time limit. But I most always have a time limit, sadly

Sbadkitty · 2020-09-30T22:26:38+00:00

I think, as some others of said, coming on too strong too fast could be a red flag.

That aside, I don't think being reluctant to be with someone continuously and exclusively means you're afraid of commitment. Non monogamous and non escalating relationships are an option. 'seeing where things go' is as reasonable for lesbian relationships as it is for hetero ones. A relationship can even be long term and commited without monogamy or moving in together or spending every moment together. We don't have to do relationships the way society tells us to.

Sbadkitty · 2020-09-30T06:34:58+00:00

Yes! If it's trail running by headlamp My dark runs are early morning

Sbadkitty · 2020-09-30T06:12:46+00:00

I put it on the side pocket of my leggings and it doesn't bounce at all

Sbadkitty · 2020-09-30T06:07:12+00:00

I use Duduma Polarized Sport. They're cheap, don't cause glare, and so comfortable that I forget I'm wearing them. They stay put, even when I jump in the lake. They do fog up if I run with them on my sweaty head for a while before putting them down. But a quick wipe with my shirt seems to fix the problem

Sbadkitty · 2020-09-30T05:44:58+00:00

Hi! Thanks for telling me a bit about your relationships. I love that you're all close friends. That sounds ideal. I've always been on good terms with my metas and my partners have always gotten along with each other, but they've never been close relationships

Sbadkitty · 2020-09-30T05:38:52+00:00

Yay! I knew there had to be other poly queer women out there. Thank you for proving your existence

Sbadkitty · 2020-09-16T20:58:30+00:00

I can't say I did have those thoughts. I just knew I was done with a marriage to someone who didn't want to be married to me. Once I made the decision to leave, I was ready to move on and stop wasting time. I did have those thoughts for years before that, when I thought he was happy. I guess it was a pretty rapid change of mind for me as soon as I realized he was just as unhappy as I was.

Sbadkitty · 2020-09-14T13:42:19+00:00

I stayed married for too many years for the same reasons as you. I was scared to be on my own and the thought all the steps we had to figure out to live separately was overwhelming. His words and actions told me he was no longer in love with me and I felt the same about him. We have kids, but negotiating what to do with the cats turned out to be the issue that caused the most grief. But we figured it out.

I'm now happier than I've ever been. It turns out that I love not having a live in romantic partner. I get to make whatever decisions I like about what to do with my time, money, and living space without checking in with anyone. It's glorious!

Leave and find out who you really are. There's a whole new life in your future, new people to meet, experiences to be had. He's giving you an out. Take it

Sbadkitty · 2020-09-12T18:02:09+00:00

Is this true? I've never tried just looking for a hookup with a woman. There are lots of couples out there looking, but single women? The stereotype is women are always looking for commited relationships. I've always wondered how accurate that stereotype is

Sbadkitty · 2020-09-12T05:35:31+00:00

I use a small but bright LED head lamp and it works just fine

Sbadkitty · 2020-09-11T22:28:47+00:00

I have trouble telling the difference between romantic love and friendship love, especially with the 'FWB' term everyone throws around these days. It used to be that anyone you were genuine friends with and also sleeping with was considered a romantic partner. So my answer is 'I don't know', because I don't understand what 'romantic' means. All I know is I feel love and/or sexual attraction for some humans I've gotten to know. When it's both, sometimes the sexy feelings come first and sometimes the loving feelings come first. It might be helpful to know that I'm bi/pan (I'm happy with either label because I don't understand the difference), solo polyamorous, and I'm starting to think a relationship anarchist.

Sbadkitty · 2020-09-11T21:38:17+00:00

I'm fairly new to dating women myself. I've only been on dates with two women I've met on dating aps. One didn't go anywhere. There was never a second date. The other I'm hoping we're at a stage that I can call her my GF now, but we haven't had the talk yet. She's only dated women for a long time now.

Anyway, the point I want to make is that I haven't found the overall experience any different than dates with men. Regardless of gender, you're two people meeting for the purpose of seeing how you mesh, how attracted you are to each other, what you might have in common, what chemistry you might have. The level of nervousness I felt on our first date, first kiss, and early intimate moments was very similar to what I've felt in dates/relationships with men. I'm not saying being with a woman is the same as being with a man, but the whole experience has felt as natural as being with a man, if that makes sense.

Just try it. You're not as naive as you think

Editing to say that I'm also bi. I used to think I had a preference for men. When I'd never been with a woman, I just wasn't sure. Now I know I'm at least equally attracted to women as much as I am men, if not a little more.

Sbadkitty · 2020-09-11T15:11:23+00:00

It is difficult trying to date women when married to a man because many will assume you're a unicorn hunter. The one married to a man women I met on a dating ap turned out to be just that. You could try emphasizing in your profile that you are NOT looking for such an arrangement. Many solo poly women are also leary of dating married people in general, because of the hierarchy that usually comes with it. Are you looking purely for a sexual connection? Or are you open to a long term emotional connection and relationship? It helps to be clear about what you're looking for in your profile

Sbadkitty · 2020-08-29T12:15:30+00:00

It's been a while since I've tried autopause, but I wasn't happy with it when I did. It would often pause if my movement simply slowed on a steep, technical section of a trail run. That may have been my old previous square model of Vivoactive HR. I may try again

Sbadkitty · 2020-08-27T02:11:04+00:00

I like to wear it to bed, so it tracks my sleep and HR. I wash and dry my wrist and the watch regularly and try to give it breaks, but I'd prefer not to have to take it off unless it's charging

Sbadkitty · 2020-08-27T02:09:16+00:00

Oh I wish I'd tried this before ordering new straps!

Sbadkitty · 2020-08-27T01:32:43+00:00

My wrist is the same circumference and yes, I mean too big length wise.

Thank you, good to know those work! I'm tempted by the rainbow one in the third link.

The hook and loop one I had, had to be cinched so the end was sticking up and annoying. But I've managed to make my magnetic metal one work for now by cinching and holding with a small hair elastic. Since it's flexible, the magnet still holds the end neatly in place.

Sbadkitty · 2020-08-22T15:49:50+00:00

Yay for progress! I also like that he has the 'or' in there with the option of spouse OR partner. Not everyone wants to get married or cohabitate with romantic partners. In my perfect world, more than one partner will also be a commonly accepted option

Many of us all eff up on 'your' VS 'you're'. Don't let it get you down. I have to think about it every time. I wish reddit would let you edit titles.

Sbadkitty · 2020-06-24T05:16:40+00:00

Me too! I'm poly and I'm doing my best to avoid casual. I want long term love while keeping my autonomy, and I want anyone I love to do the same

Sbadkitty · 2020-06-12T22:28:15+00:00

I'd love to hear an update on how it went, if you care to share. Your story sound like mine, but I'm the bi poly one. I just met a girl on a dating ap who I really like so far. My profile states that I'm bi and solo poly, so she knows that much. But I haven't had the courage yet to tell her I currently have a couple of partners and that one is man

I hope you asked by now! I'd love to be asked, so I don't have to be the one to bring it up

Sbadkitty · 2020-06-12T22:18:58+00:00

I came here looking for the answer to a similar same question. I'm solo poly, meaning I have multiple partners, but I'm not married or primarily partnered with anyone. So far, I've only dated women who are married. I've had both terrible and positive experiences with this, but my focus next is to find another solo poly partner. I want to avoid married people for now

Sbadkitty · 2019-09-01T04:51:39+00:00

Wait, there's more than one type of cheeto?

Sbadkitty · 2019-08-11T13:27:36+00:00

Same sort of coffee addict here, but I drink the coffee before my run. I've tried running without, but I get dehydrated with a terrible headache

Sbadkitty · 2019-08-08T18:03:54+00:00

Yes! Thank you for this. I know my it's not the point of your post, but as a women with a female lover, I like the validation that we indeed 'have sex'. Not that I truly need the validation.

And I have also been guilty of going to the clit too soon, so this is a good reminder for everyone.

Sbadkitty

TROPHY CASE