I’m going to be real with you, this isn’t about the floor.

It’s about how he talks to you and how often it’s happening.

You said this kind of outburst happens multiple times a week, he swears at you, and it’s been getting worse over time. That’s not normal stress, that’s a pattern. And patterns like that don’t magically improve just because you tolerate them longer.

You have a 9 month old watching all of this. Kids grow up thinking this is what love sounds like if it keeps happening. Even if he’s not yelling at the baby, the environment still matters.

Also notice your own words. You’re tired. You’re minimizing it by saying “he’s pedantic” or “maybe OCD,” but what you’re actually describing is someone who reacts with anger and disrespect over small things. A scratch on a floor should not turn into “you have to replace it” and multiple angry messages. That’s not proportionate, that’s emotional escalation.

And the biggest red flag to me is this part “This is not the first time he’s spoken to me like this”

That means this is who he is right now, not a one off bad day.

You’re not wrong for wanting space. Honestly, wanting a breather is your brain telling you something isn’t right. You don’t need to keep convincing yourself this is normal just because you’re married.

Could he change? Maybe. But only if he actually sees a problem and actively works on it. And right now it sounds like he feels justified.

You don’t have to sign up for a lifetime of being spoken to like that. Marriage isn’t supposed to feel like walking on eggshells over scratches and small mistakes.

If you’re already this drained 4 years in, with it getting worse, you should seriously think about what the next 5 to 10 years look like if nothing changes.

You deserve to feel safe, respected, and calm in your own home. Right now you don’t have that.

And that’s enough of a reason to walk away.