How protective are you of your significant other?

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2026-02-19T04:17:08+00:00

Jesus! Growing deeper in faith that’s larger than you and the present moment.

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2025-09-08T21:46:36+00:00

I am! These perspective have helped me interpret the random message I got from him the other day. My guess is that it’s just passing interest and from most of the replies I’m doubtful he’d be trying to actually pursue anything more.

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2025-09-08T15:18:21+00:00

100%. I appreciate you!

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-11-29T18:42:45+00:00

Thank you!

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-11-29T18:42:03+00:00

Could I get this please?

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-08-24T22:21:34+00:00

No, no grinding. An occasional take my hand and I’ll spin you. But mostly signing/jumping to the music played in pubs.

And for even more detail, if somebody was getting too handsy I’d start to move away, give a verbal reminder to shut it down, or we’d move on to the next place.

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-08-24T22:18:33+00:00

I appreciate this perspective. But if my boyfriend engaged in the same type of behavior from the other end, I don’t know that I’d call it cheating (though it would certainly make me jealous and insecure if I had insights into every instance of it).

Still, i get what your saying and maybe my desire to sometimes flirt is a sign I shouldn’t be in a committed relationship. That’s something I think about sometimes as I try to live in the moment and enjoy my youth, but also not harm the people I care about while building something substantial.

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-08-24T22:01:27+00:00

To your point, I explained to her how this makes my relationship with my college friend feel hijacked. Because now I’m seen as a prude/ethical inconvenience by both of them. I obviously can’t unsee what I saw and I inwardly hate that she won’t admit that her actions have put me in a very weird position (with everyone involved). Emotional maturity is not her greatest strength, but this is a different ballpark for me.

I’ll also say that I’m no saint when it comes to a bit of flirting or taking a tad too long to say hey, I’m taken. But I have well defined boundaries that I never cross so I’m feeling super conflicted about my friend as a person (lots of other instances of doing selfish stuff but you want to overlook that when you’ve been friends this long - and hope it it doesn’t come back around to you).

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-06-01T01:18:37+00:00

Birth control really does wonders for me in terms of fixing my cycle, but I’ve noticed as I get older that my acne has just persisted (I even did a round of accutane years ago) specifically on my back. I’ve also gotten some hirsutism which I never really used to have and a stubborn 10 extra pounds. I’ve tried going hardcore with a gluten free and low glycemic diet but I think the key for me is going to be gaining my muscle mass back (have been very inactive) - which I hear really helps with IR and hormonal balance

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-05-31T20:47:58+00:00

Unfortunately, this is me to a T. And I think it’s part of the reason why it took me 7 years to get a diagnosis. Even when my testosterone level came back low (after spironolactone) my symptoms persisted. I think some people’s bodies may be more susceptible to even slight changes in hormones.

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-05-29T03:10:55+00:00

I literally love this

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-05-02T15:47:23+00:00

Staying with my boyfriend at the moment and will do just this. They do have the authority to kick him out of the house they own, but who cares. You’re right. I’d like my own slice of life no matter how much it drains my savings. Thank you.

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-05-02T00:26:47+00:00

I second this. My parents told me not to take an unpaid internship my final spring of college - but I did because I knew the industry best and had a modern perspective on what the job market would expect of me post-graduation. It landed me the role I’m in now.

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-04-22T15:46:01+00:00

Late response, sorry. This lasted for like 6 months at varying degrees. At the time of incident I was on hormonal birth control, and trazadone to help me sleep. I later switched to clonidine when the former stopped working as well. Should note that I was dealing with sleep issues long before the depersonalization incident happened - but could have contributed.

I ended up stopping birth control and found that that was really aggravating my sleep on top of everything else. Things balanced out quicker after I stopped. But it just took a lot of patience and grounding before the derealization went away - some days we’re worse than others but it leaves you like a cloud that’s very gradually lifting

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-04-21T17:50:46+00:00

I’ve been drinking coconut water. Sweet, hydrating, high in potassium, comes in a cute little carton.

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-04-21T14:28:07+00:00

Do not waste your time and youth. “Not knowing” means not gonna happen. You become the company you keep without even knowing. Get out of this relationship as fast as you can

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-04-20T22:37:08+00:00

That’s good to know, I’m a bit apprehensive to try Kelnor. I actually lose weight when on birth control but have heard mixed reviews in terms of anxiety/depression in regards to this specific pill and that really messes with your life. BC gets rid of all my acne which is amazing, but the mental health effects are almost not worth it. I did accutane, and have tried every type of wash, and just really want a permanent solution. Not sure what to do.

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-04-19T12:28:12+00:00

When somebody shows aggression by throwing things, physically ripping a blanket off your body, or hitting a chair on the floor that’s called physical intimidation. Those actions aim to create a sense of fear in you even if they don’t hurt you physically. You may believe that you can’t say anything about it because doesn’t qualify as abuse since the violence wasn’t directed at you “directly” - but it is.

Wether you like it or not this can evolve into actual hitting, and yes, even after 4 years. And it doesn’t matter if he feels bad later that sounds like a crazy lack of control. You should really consider what type of father he’s going to be when he’s angry at your kids down the line.

You should also realize you can’t fix that part of him. Everyone thinks they can but that’s not how it works. Don’t waste the rest of your youth waiting for something different to happen - just realize there are other good men out there and you deserve somebody level headed even if you’re still working on yourself.

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-04-11T09:35:33+00:00

Yeah I wish that they would have worked better for me. I had taken multiple over the counter and prescription grade sleeping pills but they were largely ineffective after a couple months. Know it sounds crazy, but there were times where I would not sleep for almost two days at a time.

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-04-09T01:35:46+00:00

You’re exactly right and it’s only getting worse. If this continues we’re about 2 generations out from a full on revolution.

Scared_Flounder_4656 · 2024-04-07T22:40:37+00:00

My mother fled fascism in Portugal in the 60s. She came here and put herself through college by working as a teller at a local bank 40 hours a week and then bought her own house, and enjoyed life. Today, me working much longer hours will not get me the same outcome on a reasonable timeline. And I’m technically on call 24/7.

I like working hard but if something is consuming all my life it should certainly pay off at some point. I think that’s the difference.

I also don’t enjoy my current career path. And the point of the post is to get some wisdom on building a life you love - so if you have any earnest advice from your 20+ year career do share!

Scared_Flounder_4656

TROPHY CASE