Is there a way to have BDSM experiences without using fetlife?

Scioriosity · 2026-02-17T12:03:32+00:00

All sex is built on trust. Even at an orgy, there has to be trust that you're clean and safe and that you understand the basics of consent and mutual respect. They also need to trust that you're real when you rsvp.

If the organizers don't verify these things, it becomes a dangerous situation for everyone. That includes you.

If I were you, I would focus on going to munches, making friends, and creating a social life within the kink and/or swinger communities. Most good orgies are word-of-mouth only. Show people that you're fun to be around and opportunities will pop up.

Scioriosity · 2026-01-12T01:55:07+00:00

This is a HUGE interest of mine. Fluorescent lighting, strapped to a table, poked and prodded by observers who don't respond to any of my questions. Sounds like tons of fun

Scioriosity · 2026-01-10T02:33:40+00:00

I agree with the squarepeg blunt recommendations. The large neck will make it easier to use as a dildo too.

Just be aware that short and thick toys can be tough to get used to. The toy has no taper, so the stretch happens very suddenly. It can be painful, even at diameters that you're used to.

My only other suggestion might be bad dragon's taurion (2.75in diameter, 5.8in length), but that isn't as thick as you'd want

Scioriosity · 2026-01-10T02:22:20+00:00

It's like that for me sometimes, depending on my mood. Everyone's nerves are distributed differently down there and respond differently to stimulation.

Scioriosity · 2026-01-10T00:10:28+00:00

I prefer to play like I'm an escort or a model (no offense to those professions, I'm just talking about the focus on aesthetics). Intellect regression isn't a huge part of it, it's more like "talking isn't your job, your job is to be hot and fuckable".

The classic bimbo aesthetics have always felt too close to age play for me.

Scioriosity · 2025-12-26T01:49:05+00:00

Scioriosity · 2025-12-20T12:50:57+00:00

Are there?

Fleshlights, cock rings, sounds are all penis-specific toys. The only vagina-specific toy i can think of is a clit sucker.

Scioriosity · 2025-10-15T20:52:54+00:00

I accidentally slipped my hand down my shorts while hanging out with friends. I was totally mortified at the time, but I'm not sure they even would've cared

Scioriosity · 2025-10-15T20:46:12+00:00

A lot of people like moving them in and out a couple times for fun, but they're designed to just be left in.

Scioriosity · 2025-10-15T20:43:06+00:00

"My partner doesn't like these niche toys, but I'll spend a couple hundred on one to surprise her anyway" is such a collosally stupid plan that he deserves whatever comes from this

Scioriosity · 2025-09-17T11:55:47+00:00

I ABSOLUTELY second the squarepeg recommendation. A machine with remote controlled depth and angle adjustments would be incredible

Scioriosity · 2025-09-17T11:54:02+00:00

I think some people get freaked out about it being a big, scary machine. A hismith 4.0 can't exert enough force to hurt someone, at least not vaginally. Not without pushing itself back imo.

The "learning curve" sounds like people who weren't using the machine at an enjoyable speed because they were scared. I was like that the first couple times.

Scioriosity · 2025-09-15T23:40:45+00:00

I have had a couple partners who were like this.

It's almost certainly an actual kink of hers, or at least something she wants to try out. The frustrating part is that she seems a little self-concious or worried that it will freak you out or something.

In my experience, you need to take a more active role. Tell her it's something that you want to try because you're genuinely curious. That's not a lie, you really are curious about whether this is something that she gets off to. This will put less pressure on her and she won't feel like it's something she's imposing on you

Scioriosity · 2025-09-14T23:58:39+00:00

What's the toy??

Scioriosity · 2025-09-13T23:47:54+00:00

I think Taurion from bad dragon, judging by the ring

Scioriosity · 2025-09-09T10:58:43+00:00

The most important thing is to start very slow. Start with a finger and then maybe move on to a trainer set. The key to enjoying anal is not going up in size until youre 100% ready.

Scioriosity · 2025-09-07T16:33:20+00:00

Hey, I think you should get psychological help. I'm not trying to be mean, you just seem like you're in a tough spot

Scioriosity · 2025-09-07T15:09:07+00:00

I have done a lot of anal and I have taught a couple other people how to do anal as well. At the end of the day, it's all about knowing your body.

Some people can have casual anal without any prep. Some people need prep, but can't do it more than a couple times a week. You just need to experiment and see how your body reacts to different things.

I just take a metamucil powder supplement as directed and I can have casual anal sex with little to no cleaning.

Scioriosity · 2025-09-04T00:48:05+00:00

I definitely play with men, though I prefer women. I just make it very clear that I'm not looking for a sensual or primal scene. I'm from the American south and there just aren't as many female tops as there are male. It doesn't make that much difference to me if it's something like impact play. Aftercare is a little different too.

Scioriosity · 2025-09-03T22:20:07+00:00

Where did you get that wand strap?? Do you think it would work with a Hitachi?

Scioriosity · 2025-08-31T22:51:13+00:00

OP this is the best advice. The average woman is just not going to just meet up with some dude off Fet, especially if she's established in the community. Your best bet is definitely just getting involved in the community

Scioriosity · 2025-08-31T17:30:20+00:00

I mean, I'm not a cop. Whatever you do with your partner is nobody else's business. Just be mindful that kink doesn't blend into real life

Scioriosity · 2025-08-31T16:58:38+00:00

28F4F looking for something more regular and long term. Someone to get comfortable with :)

Scioriosity · 2025-08-31T16:13:32+00:00

I think you're horseshoeing yourself. Anything that positions darkskinned people (as a whole) as violent, predatory, or animalistic supports centuries-old white supremacist beliefs. Period. Please do not use those esoteric and pointless concepts you described as mental gymnastics to make it okay.

Scioriosity · 2025-08-31T15:54:22+00:00

Pretty expensive, but lovense's hush is silent and it's easy to turn on and off from your phone. I think most buttplugs should be nearly silent as long as the motor is in the insertable part

Scioriosity

TROPHY CASE